i met this awesome chick and we have been seeing each other for a couple of weeks now. Everything is good she has good morals, hot body, pretty and is one of those lady in the street , but a freak in the bed types ( i am soooo lucky i know).
I was a little nervous the first coupe of dates we went on ( so i got on it). Had really awesome times with her. fucked her sober was ok... fucked her high as fuck was really good... fucked her tipsy another time was getting better.. anyway she asked me if had taken drugs in the past, i said yes. She asked if i still do, i said no, but quickly changed to yes because i knew she knew i was lying. i gave a long story about how some drugs are stigmatised etc and a bit about my past without SPAM the present.

regardless of what state of mind I'm in i really like this girl, but when I go out i like to party.

relationship is still fresh right now, i feel if i tell her she will be acting funny around me if she knows I'm on something and feel that the feeling I'm projecting is fake, but she is ok with us having a couple of drinks to set the mood though ( like most ppl)

should i tell her or does she already know?

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you can fake it till you make it, but if it feels REAL go with the flow!

I really don't understand the overall question here? You said you told her and then went on to ask if whether she knows or not.. If you already told her then surely she does know?

A lot of girls are mindset in that drugs are "bad" and it has to do with their upbringing and always been told the horror stories. Some girls cannot change their opinions and it is just something which they have their mindset on and trying to change them would/could result in exclusion from their lives.

Maybe a choice has to be made between the drugs and her. EVERYONE loves to party but drugs are something in which my opinion may heighten the intensity of the night at that exact moment but in long term they have nothing but negative side effects. I do believe in living for the moment but if you really want this to work long term you might have to make a decision between her or the drugs.

Sit her down, talk about it, consider your options and choose. It really all comes down to how much you really want to make this work and how tolerant she is. Her tolerance will depend on your mindset and general appearance when under the influence and also how she feels about drugs in general.

she doesn't know about the present usage and what it is exactly ( but i feel that she might be suspicious)

sometimes we hang out and im on something. I make sure i have few drinks to let her think that my behaviour must be what i am like when im drunk, but she really doesn't know whats going on inside of me or what state of mind i am really in.

i don't think I should tell her cause she is very conservative and probably holds a strong view against it. i try to avoid her when i am having a come down too ( i get very agitated and aloof, but i don't try to fill the void i just ride it out).

but i feel a sense of guilt and might start tapering it off in the future

this behaviour all started after a big break up a year ago to mask my pain ( which actually isn't present anymore)

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you can fake it till you make it, but if it feels REAL go with the flow!