The MYTH of DHVing!



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PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 12:00 am 
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Pf ban me dude
I'm gonna cry for weeks if you do.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 1:52 am 
Romeo, I know in your world everyone loves you and that's all great. But, let me point something out . . . you say I need to grow up and act like a man . . . yet I didn't use any personal attack against you. I simply said cut the bullshit. Yet, look at what you've done. Personally attacked me. Obviously our own behavior shows who's more mature.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 2:08 am 
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You implied that DHVing through routines and talking was not an effective way and that was what I was talking about Romeo. If you read my whole post, you would have seen that I agreed in the merrits of your style and that it is similar to my style, because I DHV in the same way. I wasn't attacking you at all, but maybe you are just being defensive because you think that we're all out to get you, which I'm not.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 2:50 am 
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alrite all of this isnt necessary, take the post for what it is, obviously it caters better to some than others or this post is going to end up like meths post about sex advice and tips, that was entertaining though haha

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 3:02 am 
LOL, Ice, you're living in a dreamland man. Some things just can't be ignored. They just have to be taken care of in life.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 5:55 am 
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if i was living in dream land, take no offense, but everyone of you guys would either be dead or never existed and i would be the only guy left on earth full of bisexual hb10's

lol

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 5:58 am 
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Romeo, good fella, after reading your post, I have realized that some of the material is not congruent. Maybe you misunderstood some of it, or for another reason, but DHVing is part of even the "natural" approach. The quote you used from Hitch, "...if you're shy, be shy..." is saying exactly what the other guys are telling you.

Simply, to explain the quote (since I used it as an example), that particular person's DHV is the shyness. Somewhere out there out of the billion or so women there are in this world, one of them is attracted to that shyness. She will see it, it will make him different, and cute, and whatever else the female is thinking of him. Hell, PUAs use "not showing interest" as a DHV all the time, some girls take this as disinterest, but others as shyness particularly. Rye said it earlier, it's verbal semantics.

It's higher value because he is himself. He is not trying to change who he is to get a girl, which is I think the point you were trying to get across?

Some of us add canned things to our arsenal, some of us unfortunately lie, we learn from mistakes and observation, but whatever it is, however we are doing it, DHVing is necessary. Humans are creature of habit and we always want what holds more value to us or in this case the girl wants something of higher value to her.

Having confident body language is maybe one of the simplest DHVs. I am only 19 years old, and I wouldn't even be able to get into bars/clubs without being alpha. Try it. If you are still not convinced, try not carrying yourself well and see how much value people perceive you to have...and then take note of how it detrimentally affects your game...


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 7:13 am 
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Woudlnt personal attacks be DLV in the first place?

In a way your right, but Im sure your misunderstanding the whole purpose of DHV stories, real or not.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 7:55 am 
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Not sure who you were replying to?

Personal attacks are DLV. I was constructively criticising the point he was trying to make by addressing him personally since he is the originator of the post. I offered my understanding, what I thought to be his, and others (or in other words, I thought the best way to be objective). Then I offered a solution for him to test out his representation. There is quite a difference between attacking someone and trying to gain something from a situation. Now it is up to him to tell us how, if at all he tries what I am suggesting he do, it affects his game. Again, it is a learning process. How can he, and us for that matter, know if what he's saying is true without trying it?


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 8:55 pm 
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Quote:
Agreed with Romeo. Banning is for people who are otherwise powerless in real life, immature too.
i see a banishment in your future :lol:

c'mon lets lighten up

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 9:14 pm 
Sophistication, apparently you aren't very sophisticated. A forum has rules. These rules are in place to keep things running smoothly. These rules include NOT trashing other members of the forum, especially when that trashing is unwarranted. Mods are in place to enforce the rules. Is there a problem with this method in your mind?

Keep that in mind as you're calling Brad, the owner of this forum, powerless because he has the power to ban someone because they are out of line. A person won't keep a job for long either, if they continue to be a jackass.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 9:34 pm 
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Internet Power = Pointless

The trick is to have power in real life.

Anyway, see? My beautiful thread has been killed by attacks, err from now on, I'm ignoring that.

Of course, nobody attacked, nobody told me:
- Cut the bullshit (As if I was lying)
- That DHV works, and it should be shocking! (Wow, really? what a discovery?)

Yup, that really shows who's more mature

On a happier note though!

Rye Lee, I gave you the reason, I'm not attacking you, I will repeat this

What I wrote is *MY VIEW* just like anybody else writes.

And one more time

DHV through your personality is what happens right away as soon as you start the interaction and even previous to it.

DHV through stories serve to magnify on the attraction that you initially started with other attractive traits, find commonalities and open other threads.

They complement each other

My POINT however was this: When people filled their brains with so much stuff, they become a mess inside. Keep it simple and you will be happy.

Point, Peace.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 11:16 pm 
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I risk using the term "you guys" in fear of putting you guys on the defensive right off the bat. The word you is a very powerful word and when used without thought of how it will be perceived by the other party then it is going to be the end of a rational conversation instantly. It is easy to put people on the defensive, we all know that- we also know that nothing gets accomplished. Be careful when using peoples names and the word you please people. I respect *most* of the people here but I will stand by Voltaire and fight to the death for everyones right to be heard regardless of how stupid/immature something is- not to mention half of the things people say that aren't field tested...

I am asking that you do not ban respected members Brad. Even though they might not be respected by some members, for example the moderators, there are plenty that do. Just the same as there are some people who do not agree with what some of the moderators have to say, there are plenty that do. It is the same exact scenario on both sides but the moderators are the ones with the power ( the power to ban that is ).

_____________________________________________

Now to the content of the post

I have to stand by Romeo on this one 100%
What I believe Romeo is saying is that...

The difference between assumed and given value is the mindset behind it all (as is the key with everything, your reasons behind it)

My best friend, the best natural, smartest and most intuitive person I know, told me two days ago that I had it all along (after I told him about my introduction into the community a few weeks prior and my social group as I told him that I go out with). He told me that I wore my soul on my sleeve and that women would come up to him constantly and ask him about me (they would come up to me as well but I didn't realize what they were doing). Although I did not see it at the time because I was frankly afraid of being close with girls, I could have pulled any girl I wanted. He told me that recently I have become a different person to the watchful eye and that although I know what to say to women to get them into bed or whatnot its different because I'm actually TRYING!

after thought for a couple days
I realize that trying is what has fucked me up
although it was a necessary step for me to take in order to reach where I am at now
All you have to do is be yourself and if you don't get that- which I assume most of you won't and I know exactly who will ( the people with opinions that I respect ) then keep trying new things so you can realize that yourself. Me telling you that will not give you the epiphany fully, you have to climb the ladder yourself, rung by rung.

I had values
-I upheld them
I genuinely cared about people
-People saw that
FUck the rules and all you haters but I AM a nice guy I will not fight it anymore
-but I did not let people walk over me (I say nice guy, not the girls bitch- huge difference)
I didn't ever plan what I was going to say
-And yet women would know exactly who I was because it radiates through you if you are congruent

Romeo is saying that the value that matters is the value is read between the lines. When I met Romeo in person I was able to tell his character and his values simply by listening to him and attending his seminar. He wasn't GAMING his students. But if you read between the lines you can tell a lot about a person and Romeo is a legitimate respectable person who has plenty to say that deserves to be heard.

EVERY SINGLE WORD AND SENTENCE YOU CREATE AND SAY TO SOMEONE SHOWS YOUR CHARACTER AND YOUR VALUE OR LACK THEREOF
EVERY SINGLE FUCKING WORD should you choose to admit it or not
You don't need a story to display it

And yes I agree with meth- there is much need for canned lines and stories in the beginning as they are the boat that carry you across the river from canned to natural. So if you disagree maybe you have yet to cross that river and instead of arguing with me initially, why don't you think about it. I think the word you might have just fucked me so if you are on the defensive GET OUT OF IT haha. I love humor- it allieviates a lot of things
I love you guys!

This post alone probably can tell 90% about me if you read carefully.
hint* 1 of them is that I ramble a lot which could lead to me not being an organized person and can also lead to me not being an organized thinker
which means you should probably be wary to take any of my advice in the first place

I urge you to be careful before you argue with "just be yourself" because you might be under the impression that you can get ANY girl you want. Truth be told- you can't- and you shouldn't. People are different for a reason, find one that fits you- don't try to match a square with a triangle. However, I am not saying that a triangle can't be reshaped into a square but thats a different topic. Be yourself, be social to find women who you can spend time with, and then MOVE ON TO THE NEXT OBSTACLE IN YOUR LIFE!!! PU IS NOT THE END ALL THING IT IS MADE OUT TO BE!!!!!!

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 12:04 am 
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I agree that every word you use communicates something. To quote someone clever whose name I forgot, 'it's impossible to not communicate'.

And because of that, routines kick ass. At the core of it, the task of the PUA is to convey his personality. The only way to do this is to use material - the material is the vehicle for your personality to ride in. And since it's going to be the same personality you attempt to convey, you will most likely be using the same material. We are performing artists, remember that. Much like comedians, our rehearsed material helps us convey who we are.

Someone here mentioned using the same material over and over is lame. But... everyone does it. And I don't just mean PUAs, I mean everyone who is at least a little socialized. Is there anyone who claims they've never told the same story to two different people? Am I not getting something here? I highly recommend Swinggcat's "Demistifying Charisma" (it's only 6 pages long, but it really shared some good insights about routines).

One point I picked up from the discussion (can't remember who made it, but credit where due) is that you have to be congruent with your material. And while I agree assuming value is just great, I see nothing wrong with having some rehearsed material.

Some people seem to have the idea that in a routine you're supposed to indirectly brag about how great you are. IMO, that's not it at all.

A lot of the routines I use are just dumb games - 5 questions, for instance. Or 'tell me 3 interesting things about you, make one of them false, and I'll try to guess which one is a lie. Then I'll do the same for you'. I'm not bragging, but I'm subcommunicating that I'm fun and I don't like boring conversation. I'd much rather find out about a girl through a fun game than through a painful interrogation-like process. Same goes for the 5 questions game. I explain WHY it works afterwards (silly as it may sound), and I'm subcommunicating that I'm an interesting, cunning guy who's obviously been out and about a lot, and has probably won quite a few drinks in his time. What I like to do then is to give away the drink I've won - again, subcommunicates I don't take everything seriously and I'm a giving guy.

Those are just examples.


And yes, I agree that if you are congruent with your material it will radiate to your targets. At the same time though, don't overestimate women's ability to read you. As amazing as it is, she doesn't know you until you convey your personality to her. If women could just see RIGHT through you, PU wouldn't exist. There would be no need to convey your personality. It would just 'convey itself' sort of speak.
Quote:
When people filled their brains with so much stuff, they become a mess inside.
How little faith you have in the members of this forum... ;-) J/K

To reiterate my point, though: in order to consistently convey your personality, you need some rehearsed material. Plus, having a couple routines up your sleeve gives you something to talk about should you blank. They're also a great way to cut off threads which are dead ends (such as target+obstacle talking about their common friends you don't know - jump into the best friends test. Happened to me on a few occasions already, and I only started this summer).

Don't shoot me, just my point of view.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 12:29 am 
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For instance you have quoted from the worst movie ever..This'Hitch' is just a tool to convince AFC's to stay losers forever and it is full of wussy advice and other shit..When was shyness attractive to girls, and i am talking about the hot ones here 8+...If you are shy,then fucken get some good body language and radiate your confidence.I dont see any harm either in telling stories that would DHV in me,remember u only have a few minutes on meeting a stranger and u have got to show her ur attractive traits..


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