Single as a dollar, and not looking for change.

30likes in 15 min mostly girls

A lot of these are great, I usually get 10-20+ likes (just shy of 200 friends.) I update a few days per week and once per day to avoid "over-saturation". But I've noticed that some people who "Like" these posts stop after a while. It doesn't stop me from updating at the end of the day but it made me wonder, can too much DHV breed jealousy? I could care less if guys are jealous but I've noticed this from a handful of chicks (who receive a lot of attention themselves for no reason other than having a vagina) Is it a competition for them?

I avoid the overtly sexual/macho ones (unless they're outrageously ridiculous and obviously a joke) but can too much DHV also make one appear cocky? Can those who don't know you too well judge you negatively by your cocky/funny status updates?

I use Facebook for fun, is there a way to poke fun at/neg people who take it way too seriously?

"How does a girl change a light-bulb? They don't they just hold the bulb up and wait for the world to revolve around them!" My Facebook literally blew up!

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

This happend to me in real life, so I used it as facebook status and it worked wonders!

Not really into putting too much thinking into my FB-status. However this actually happened so I put up:

"Girl here wears a shirt that said 'Guess'... so I guessed implants"

Not mine, read it somewhere, but had some nice results 25 likes but one from my mate and one from some gay guy... so 23 it is!

Oh and the girl got mad so no luck there, her loss!

. 15 likes. One girl commented :"??!!" and another commented "you know you got issues against girl right? Chill dude" .. What would you reply to the second comment with? I just replied with : "aww, how cute when you get all serious"

_________________
In this world, you don't get what you deserve but what you fight for!

Haha that's a perfect reply to an instant shit test!

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

-Anybody wants to meet up at an airport and do a briefcase exchange, like in the movies. I’ll fill mine with cookies.

-"I will run butt ass naked through your imagination, I don't give a fuck"

18 likes and 4 comments in 2 hrs, this one rocks!!!

Did the lightbulb joke and got some male likes and 1 female comment -.-

I modified a little the cleaning facebook friend list one. I put this:

"I have been cleaning up my friends list, so If you can read this, congratulations! You are cool enough, but don't get too comfortable I will double check"

I put it on a Sunday night around 10 pm and after 10 hrs I had 18 likes and 8 comments, some attacking me with the same sarcasm, so I just fired back in the same way receiving a like for the person I attacked. Most of the comments and likes are from girls

There is this guy who is always funny in his FB posts. Normally he gets lots of comments and many likes. please Thank Paul for all this shit:) but consider is just to make people laugh, so what out cause girls may not see any value but just a guy who could make them laugh in a date ( a value itself)

- The way I bend the rules should qualify as yoga.

- "How To Win Friends And Influence People On Facebook"
Post pictures of dogs and cats.

- My doctor gave me a prescription for anti-depression meds but my Bartender is having a hard time reading his writing...

- Hey ladies, tired of your boyfriend complaining about how long it takes you to get ready? Start blow drying your hair in the nude. I promise no more complaints.

- when are they coming out with a lesbian bareback mountain movie????

- I now have the same number of Tour de France titles as Lance Armstrong.

- Alcohol does kill brain cells. As a kid I could name all the dinosaurs. Now I can name maybe three, and I'm not even sure armadillos count.

- The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until
you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months warm, happy, and floating...you finish off as an orgasm.


hope it helps or at least make you laugh
DG

I thought it was quite funny as well, but it appears my friends did not. Only two likes, both of them guys (out of 350+ friends). Different crowd I guess.

_________________
One of the most useful things you will ever learn about body language.

I put this FB status today:
" *DG* is choosing to start the week in a happy state of mind"

14 likes: 9 girls, from those girls 5 are HB between 7.5 to 9

DLV score: I believe this is an 8/10. Girls feel like you are a happy dude. I have received before the comment of: "you are a very positive guy, we should talk more" and all this thanks to FB status.

btw. I am very positive, so I am just using a real fact to work on my favour. It may not work same way if you are in your early 20s but in the 30s this works.

DG

So I heard avicii made a new song about cats... "ohh sometimes, I get a good feline".

Puns

_________________
DISCLAIMER: The author of this post does not take responsibility for any form of vomiting, headache, or any other illness caused by the stupid vocabulary and/or the opinions expressed and used throughout the post.