I went to a bar on campus with a friend and we were just chatting away when we noticed these three girls sit down 5 or 6 seats down. I immediately saw the one I was interested and made her my target. However, I didn't approach her right away because (before this) I had never approached a complete stranger and started chatting/flirting with them.

After a few minutes, her friends left the target by herself and I knew this was a golden opportunity. But, since I was so nervous I had to wait a few minutes to calm down, grab my balls and remind myself, as well as my friend remind me, that I AM a man.

I eventually said fyck it and thought "what do I have to lose?" and I approached her with the following line:
"Hey, I saw you from over there and I thought you were really cute so I thought I'd come say hi."

She reacted really well to this, despite how cliche it is, and we talked for a couple minutes before her friends came back. I talked with them a bit, escalated kino, showed interest, made her smile, laugh etc. Then I finally built up the courage to just go for the kill and get her number. She gave it to me!

I was so fycking happy! My first real attempt and I didn't die!!

Anyways, this is where I went down hill.

I texted her 1h30min later and since that night (October 19th) I haven't heard from her (although her friend added me on FB [nothing but friendship there, believe me]).

Did I text her too soon? Did I make myself look desperate and ruin everything before it could actually have started? Did she give me a fake number? Or is she just playing the waiting game?

Full kudos for approach it seems like your value came over as to low for her, this is why I always neg as it lowers her value and makes her want to please you, not the other way around which makes you look way out of her league.

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Leave her better than when you found her...

A lot of the number closes you do, especially the ones on clubs and night game, won't text you back. That's the hard truth of it.

Then again, it also depends on what you write in that text and ofcourse how long you wait. To be honest, I don't follow the "you have to wait 2 days before texting her" rule. I text when I feel like it, but you should evaluate the situation before you do so.

Good going approaching her though! Just keep on approaching girls, and if she doesn't reply, she will soon be forgotten.

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Alea iacta est - The die has been cast

I n-closed this girl and couldn't really get her to respond back after texting her several times. So I moved on. Friday night I was making out with some other chick and that previous girl texts me out of nowhere with "Sup". It had been a couple weeks and I honestly think she probably just wanted me to buy her alcohol or something.

The point is that they may respond right away or never again, or when you are with another girl and no longer care about them. You can't control when/why/how they respond to you, so you might as well just keep gaming other girls in the meantime. If they decide to communicate with you in a normal way, they'll get some dick slid in them. If not, their loss.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn

I disagree with this. Negging just makes you look like a dick.

OP, why didn't you try to fuck her that night? Always try and take it as far as possible.

You didn't text her too soon, I always text on the same night. Maybe just try and text her again, or call her.

Thanks for the kudos man. Why would you say that my value came off as too low? Negging will definately be something I'll have to look more into
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- So, does that mean that you're more likely to get a reply from a target you pickup from daygame? Thanks for the props and the advice! Makes a lot of sense.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I thought texting a girl a lot makes you look desperate? Or is that just persistence?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Believe me, I wanted to. I just went in with this mentality that I wanted to get her number. Depsite the fact I wanted to fyck her like crazy (still do), I figured that if I got her number everything else would fall into place. A stupid newbie mistake...Let's hope I've learned from this and can actually improve on it

Think about it, if someone approached you at a night club and you gave your number to them. Or, if you met someone during day time at the mall or w/e. Who would you reply? Besides, she was probably a little drunk, and might not trust her own judgement at that time. Point being, don't get too stuck up with this one HB and one number-close. When you've gotten a couple of numbers, you'll have so much going for you that you won't put too much thought in to those that doesn't reply.

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Alea iacta est - The die has been cast

Wow!

That's a really good point! That's the sorta thing you would never think of but as soon as someone mentions it it makes perfect sense.

Quick question though, any tips to overcoming AA? Cuz I have found myself with many chances yet I'm still reluctant to approach. Today alone, I had two really good chances but I didn't even move from my spot.

Thanks a lot for your advice by the way! I'm sure you can tell that I suffer from oneitis lol

AA is quite the bitch. The only way to get over AA is to approach. There's a lot of guides, self hypnosis etc. as to how you can get over your AA, the only useful thing I've gotten from those is the rationalizing of it.

First of all, a huge part of AA is the belief that "She'll probably think I'm a wierdo for approaching." Truth of it is, most women don't. But what you need to realize is that even if they do, does it really matter?

I don't remember his name now, but there was a PU Guru that had sent one of his new students out a night to open sets and overcome AA. When he returned, the guru asked how it went. "Well.. On my way to town, I saw a girl sitting alone on a bus stop. So I thought it would be a good warmup to open her! I went over to her and said hi.. She replied with PISS OFF!"... So the Guru said "Wow.. That's pretty harsh!" "Yeah, but I wasn't about to give up that easily. I remembered what you told me about persistence, so I asked her if she was allright. I mean, to be that harsh against a stranger she had to be pretty down!".. The guru then asked him "So.. What happened then?" The student smiled a bit and said "Well.. She said: Either you piss off, or I will. She stood up and left." This girl was sitting at a bus stop.. She was most likely waiting for the bus, and she stood up and left! "Well.." said the guru, "How did you feel afterwards? Did it ruin your night?" the student answered "No, that's the wierd thing.. I felt like a god! I mean, this is the worst possible thing that could ever happen, and I've allready experienced it! I did more approaches than I've ever done in one night, because I knew that no matter what happened, nothing could be as bad as this. It was great!"

The same Guru also said a quote that I love - First you do the things you're scared of, then you get the courage.

Now this is one aspect of AA. You have to get rejected to understand that it's not that bad. The worst part of approaching, even if you get rejected, is the fear of rejection.

The second most important part of understanding how to overcome AA is the belief that "What if people see me approaching, won't they think I'm weird? And what if I get rejected? They must think I'm a total loser." First of all, most people won't even notice. Second, why should you let it bother you what the other guys think? Why would you let what someone else thinks of you stop you from doing what you want to do? They are complete strangers, and you probably wouldn't give a rats ass about what they do! If they went to approach a girl, you wouldn't really care.. Hell, if anything, when I see someone approach a girl, I actually think higher of them, because I know most guys don't have the balls to do that!

The bottom line of it is - Why should you waste energy thinking about what some strangers think of you? There is no point at all doing it. Even if someone observed you doing it, and actually payed attention to what you did. They won't remember in 10 minutes anyway. The girl you're approaching? If she rejects you, she'll most likely be very polite about it. If it's night/club game, she might be quite rude about it, and I actually (for your sake) hope she is! That way, you'll realize that it's actually not that bad.

As I mentioned earlier though, the only way to expand your comfort zone, is to move out of it. If you use affirmations, you might want to add that to your list "I love moving out of my comfort zone". The only way to get over AA is to approach. I hope though, with this information in mind, it will be easier for you to realize WHY you have to do it. Trust me, even when you know this, it will still be as scary as before. But now you KNOW why you have to approach, and hopefully you understand that all those thoughts popping up in your head as to why you shouldn't approach, is irrational thoughts purely based on fear and not logic.

First you do the things you're scared of, then you get the courage.

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Alea iacta est - The die has been cast

Wow! I can't thank you enough for this info! I've copy/pasted your message and saved it on my computer; it's that helpful!

So much of what you said relates to my situation and what I'm thinking. For example, I worry that girls or the people in the area will think I'm a weirdo if I approach them...but like you said, who cares?

I have tried to start using affirmations so that's a really good suggestion and I'll see if this is something that will continue to help me improve my game.

From some of the answers I've seen you give before, you look like a PU Guru to me. Your answers all make sense, they're well-thought out and, most importantly, they help.

Damn man! I don kno how to thank you aside from saying it but I will try and justify all the advice you've given me by trying to put myself out there and get some results. If you ever think about coming to Ottawa, Canada let me know!

Now if you'll excuse me I have some AA to overcome!

this line is never cliche, its a good opener, but its the delivery which counts with these things.

And yes you texted her way too soon, And as that other guy said, expect number/text flakes, its part of the game. Just keep approaching and opening, eventually you will be able tell the difference between a firm prospects and weak ones.

lol you didn't text too soon, in fact you texted TOO LATE.

Bro how are you going to get a girl's number, and dip?

Rule #1, text her immediately while she's in front of you. MAKE HER SAVE YOUR NUMBER IN YOUR PHONE.

The buying temperature is high once she gives you her number, but when you text a few hours later or a few days later, her mood has changed. It won't be the same girl emotionally that you interacted with.

Also before you get the number, suggest that you two hangout sometime. This reduces flakes/no responses by a HUGE MARGIN.

You come across as a genuine guy, rather than a guy who's goal is to get the number to satisfy his little ego.

Also try taking your interactions farther, you were playing too safe.

detox75: How long do you generally wait? Cuz I would have texted/called her right in front of her actually but the bar was in a basement with no service.

VietnameseProdigy: I don kno why I jus headed off. My intention going in was to ger her number and once I got it, I left. Newbie mistake, I know.
That's a great idea about suggesting to hang out before asking for a girl's number. I tried that yesterday and it worked (we're talking now).
Still don really know how I to take interactions farther. I know a big part is kino but that's about it. Any suggestions?

I will amend my previous statement for the immediate text exception, as the Viet-P said, that gives her a chance to text you first which always sets the table much better; making her show interest first. Better to attract and be pursued then to attract and then have to work for it. And if you text right in front of her, rather then an hour or two later it doesn't look desperate.

But barring that I usually wait 2-5 days. Then ping with some non-sequitor random half-ass text to calibrate her interest before I go for the meet up. with first texts I always send some random, brief text, to calibrate interest level before I go for a date, this prevents looking desperate or try hard. If she wont respond to my four day late, half ass text I know its not worth my time to go out with her, I no longer pursue low interest get togethers, I'm too lazy; I would rather focus my energy on high-interest woman and new prospects.

It doesn't help you to text her early or often, or run extended text game. Texting gets a lot more new guys in trouble then it actually helps. Your job at this point is just not to fuck up, either you have enough attraction that she wants to see you again, or you don't, in which case your goose is cooked. Use text to establish credibility and value but be succinct. The game will resume on the meet up, not over the greyscale screen with black letters.

eventually said fyck it and thought "what do I have to lose?" and I approached her with the following line:
"Hey, I saw you from over there and I thought you were really cute so I thought I'd come say hi."

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rohai hans