My ex-OLTR of 10 months dumped me 2 weeks ago. I emailed her a couple days after (the dumping text msg exchange was real awkward, left a bad taste in my mouth) saying that it was my fault (I HAD been acting weird, and had done something not-so-cool that I assumed had triggered her decision).
She emails me back today saying it wasn’t my fault, but that the new guy she has been seeing “found out about you and was angry that I was still talking to you. I'm not even exclusive with this guy. No idea what's going on.” She then added that she barely sees me anymore, which is true – we both moved back in with parents, and I’ve been studying for this insanely hard test in December (on top of that, the new guy is friends with her best friend’s boyfriend, so naturally he’s around more/more convenient). She ended the email by saying that if I ever changed my mind about being friends she’d be there (when we were together I always laughed at the idea of us being friends after… because it really is a comical idea to me).

Anyway… I want this girl back on the roster… and I think she’s down given how us being open for 10 months was every-bit as much her idea as it was mine. Clearly, with her description of this needy new bro she has set the table for some boyfriend destroyer type stuff… I have zero experience with this type of game and zero experience with any LTR stuff in general… suggestions? What do I reply with? How long do I wait to reply?


MUCH LOVE

You dont reply... you leave her be!

Work on your exam on december....

She already has a guy to fill her void... dont waste time! confronting her, or trying to be her friend will only distance yourself from your true objective, and she will play you like a fool, so dont even think going on that road.

Start meeting new people, new girls, eventually she will pick up that you are not chasing her, this will intrigue her ... and when that happens, its your time to strike.

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Oh! You've gotta be kidding me!

Thanks for your help!! My inclination to reply is twofold:

1) The messages I sent her in response to me being dumped/apology email I sent her after were a bit AFC. In this next message, I might be able to re-frame and show that I’m not worried about the whole ordeal and have moved on

2) Replying would allow me to let her know that we can pick up right where we left off… because we we’re OPEN to begin with. I really never had an issue with her seeing other guys (which apparently this new guy does)…. It just feels weird to play the silent game when we were never attached to begin with.


With that said, after reading your response I went “DUH!” and agree with you. Goddamn it’s tempting though.

Again dont contact her...

If you see her be playfull and funny, show her it didnt had no effect on you.

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Oh! You've gotta be kidding me!

When will I know this is the case... because from the way she described this guy "he ALWAYS has my phone so my text messages are never safe" and "were not even exclusive. No idea whats happening" she is already dissatisfied with him. Like obviously me "being friends with her is out of the question... but if I get a drunk text from her next weekend of some sorts... how do I know the I've reached the "time to to strike" phase and the "she'll play you for a fool" phase has ended?


Thanks again

If you receive a drunk text ignore it....

I have to say this girl is dangerous, and if you want some type of relantioship dont.

You will notice, when she will constantly trying to get your attention, setting up dates calling you

Or you full ignore her for a full month and then set up date your choice.

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Oh! You've gotta be kidding me!