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my question to you is this, obviously this confidence we are discussing, if not solely with regards to women, has very much to do with women. so where would someone (total afc) try to start to gain some inner confidence? i wasnt that confident, but my main problem was AA. opening all of these sets in many different scenarios got me over my AA very quickly, which elevated my confidence hugely, does that make sense?
sorry if this is confusing, its 420 (

) AM and ive been snorting adderall all night reading half a semester's worth of reading to get this paper done before tomorrow night so i can fuckin sarge!
Nah, it's not confusing at all. Don't get me wrong, I think it's great that you can approach girls with confidence. Not many guys can do that, so I admire your ability to do so. The problem I have with it, is using it as a source of confidence.
To really answer the question fully, we have to first understand why we do what we do. And it's not about women. We do what we do because of a subconscious search for masculinity. That is what we are really after. We want to feel masculine, to feel like a man. We tend to project that onto women, because we have an unconscious belief that "if I can get women, I will be a man and I will finally find my masculinity."
But, we are mistaken in this belief. When a man makes his search about women, he could have the most gorgeous HB10 in his life, but he still wants more, more, more. No matter how many beautiful women he has, he will never find satisfaction or fulfillment, and he certainly won't find masculinity. That is because femininity
arouses masculinity, it does not
bestow masculinity.
The reason I say such a method of gaining confidence is a problem, is because since industrialization men have had a lack of mature male mentors to teach them how to be a man. As a result, men turned to their mothers and a female-dominated education system to learn what it meant to be a man and to be masculine. This led to men being comfortable being defined by women and dependent on the approval of women. We have given our power away to women and believe that "in order to be a man, I must get women to like me and approve of me" and that our power comes from women.
Your method of gaining confidence continues the dangerous trend of gaining power through women. You gained confidence because the women you approached approved of you.
Imagine now that the first 15 women you approached had not approved of you and responded to you in a negative way. Would you still have gained confidence from that? Or would your confidence have been reduced? It is likely you would not have even gotten to 15, and would have given up after the first 3 or 4 women who rejected you.
If you look around this forum, you'll see many guys posting things along the lines of "I've lost my confidence with women," or "I can't get my confidence back," or "I used to be good with women, but now I don't feel confident," etc. The reason they are in that situation is because the confidence they had came from women. However, after a series of negative interactions with women, and most often a breakup, their confidence is gone because it was dependent on continuous approval of women.
They know and tell themselves that they are still good with women, they know the things they are supposed to do, and they know that there are plenty of other women out there. Yet, because of the nature of their confidence, their subconscious is telling them "I wasn't good enough for that girl, she didn't want me, there must be something wrong with me." And they have to essentially start all over again with building their confidence back up by experiencing positive interactions with women.
Whereas a confidence that comes from within, is not dependent on women. It doesn't matter if you have no women, an amazing woman, or many terrific women, it has absolutely no impact on your confidence at all. That is because you have constructed your life in such a way that you have so many amazing things going on, that are not motivated by trying to attract women, that even single you feel completely whole. If you decide to bring a woman into your life, it is not so she can complete you, but because you have deemed her worthy of someone with whom you would like to share your amazing life. She is not your adventure, you are merely bringing her along on your adventure.