Hey guys,

So last friday I did a good gaming with a girl I've known for a while but screwed up in the closing... I will spare the detail but if you're curious to know them here is my report :
hb-85-good-gaming-but-bad-closing-vt144 ... highlight=

So comes the time to set up a date for day two. First of all I call and no answer. So i decide to write her a Facebook message. This is how it goes :

Hey, I tried to call you earlier, but since you were probably too shy to respond, I'm writing to you :p

Seriously, I would like to go see a music show this week and I'd like you to come along. I'm free in the beginning of the week. What do you think?


And that's what she respond to me :

Actually this week I need to practice for an audition, so I won't be able to go... Maybe an other week

At that point knowing her, and since last friday she told me she was up to do something with me this week, I"m pretty much sure it's an excuse and that at this point my only other chance to see her is to bump into her. So i'm thinking of playing the card of the guy who just doesn't care and see how it goes from there. And this is what I'm thinking of writing back :

Hey!

No problem if you too busy, but we both know what you're message means. It's probably for the best since I would have broke you,re heart ahah!

No, but seriously what I told you last friday was true. I do like you're energy and I think it would be sad to lose you as a friend.

There is probably some mistake in the message, but I'm french and I will write in french, just keep in mind the main idea

So, any suggestion?

I'm far from being an expert but I WOULD NOT send that message if I were you. Here's why:

1. She told you that she can't make it, maybe another time. You shouldn't go from "another time" to assuming she doesn't want to see you again. It's way too reactive and makes you seem insecure. Maybe she really does have an audition to practice for or something more important came up. If this is the case you'll totally weird her out with that message. Why would you react like that? Why?

2. On the other hand, maybe she actually doesn't want to see you again. So what, fuck it. Plenty of girls out there. Your still coming off way too reactive and needy which is totally unattractive from the girls point of view. Do you think this message will make her change her mind and suddenly decide to take up your offer out? Realistically?

3. Think about how she will interpret your message. I think you took the neg a bit too far, "I would only break your heart." Are you directly trying to tell her you just want to fuck her and leave? (It's a great neg for other situations though!) Then, you totally contradict that by saying you'll be sad to lose her as a friend. wtf. How do you think she'll reply to that. I personally think she won't even text back.


I could be totally wrong and you might send that and get a perfect response from her, who knows? Just my opinion dude... good luck

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Agree with the poster above. Your message back is way too reactive. It just screams that you've been thinking about her reply and that you over think it even if it could be true it took a fair amount of your time and affected you in a big way for you to respond with that.

I would just be laid back about it, just brush it off and probably state you can easily get someone else to come.

"No problem, Il just have to find a replacement. Enjoy practising ;P"

Find someone else to go with you, go with them. Worst case scenario: She doesn't care. Best case scenario: She cares.

Your message would just get a classic bitchy response.

Yep, I'm with you guys, thanks for the tips! I was trying to think of a way to make a reaction by saying I don't care, but like Bitmixit said in the post above. The best way seems to say the less things.