i was out last night with my friend - an HB9. i had three incidents in one night.

incident one - we held hands, thats what we do while moving in and out of a dance floor. while i was passing by, and some fat wannabe jock yelled out saying "fuck how'does he do that?" he was wearing a rugby jersey in a club. - nuff said about him i walked on.

Incident two - another club, another idiot, he goes to my gym. thinks he's better than everyone, always rolling around with his looser gym wannabee posse - pretty much looks like a bad remake of jersey shore. stares the girl up and down and makes comments. then later comes and tries to dance next to us trying to steal her.i just exposed him to her and she ejected herself. lol this is a funny one tho. i havent seen him even once with a girl in town, and every time we've bumped into each other i've had a girl. this is obviously doing his head in

Incident three - some tosser in a car bluntly screams "why are you with him? to her as he drives past. she hears it. and starts giving him shit.


now here's the deal. i have massive innergame issues. im working on them. in the past, the above situation was a daily occurance when im seen with even an average girl. im not th best looking lad out there but i do well to look after myself. i goto the gym, i look MUCH MUCH better body wise to any average bloke. also i look indian. this could be a race related issue for the AFC's trying to break my confidence. however, when this sort of thing happens, my confidence falls on the floor thinking im not good enough for anyone.


is this the sort of thing that i should expect as i get better?
how should i deal with these situations in the future?

Hey man, I hear about this kind of stuff a lot with guys who are with HB9+s... and you know what, I've even been guilty of it in the past when drunk and with equally drunk friends.

It could be that since she's your friend, the guys see that there's not a proper vibe between you and they feel they can usurp you. If she was actually your girlfriend I bet they wouldn't feel they have such a chance.

Either way, don't let it get to you man. I hear about lots of guys who have this kind of problem, just got to brush it off and realize they're jealous. Guys even do this to guys who drive really nice cars and shit, because they're jealous.

A lot of those guys ARE clueless idiots. Why would you pay attention to them in the first place? You have the girl. They don't. They seriously don't know why those girls are with you not because they get tons of girls, but because they don't.

It's lonely at the top. Being out there living a good life, people WILL get envious, or act like they can do it too, or like you don't deserve it. The way that you convince others that you deserve it -- the way you convince YOURSELF -- is to pay them no mind.

Next time a guy like that tries a move, turn to your girl and say "man, that was the coolest guy I ever saw. He must get all the girls." Make her laugh, then get back to exactly what you were doing before.

thanks HoldOrFlod and vcwriter for your input


i have bought this up with a good mate of mine, a good looking lad, now he's got game - he said this sort of thing would never happen to him. this makes me think if you are well out of a girls league this is going to be a common occurence?

I'm a winner. People hate me. I'm extremelly proud of myself. Tons of people giving me shit every day. AND GUESS WHAT?
I don't need them.
I can't be liked by everyone.
The people I need love me.
Chicks love me.
I've dragged chicks off other guys DAMN THEY HATE ME.

And ofcourse...
Their shit just brings me up. I know I don't care and they keep pouncing the "don't care" button in my brain. Just be alpha. Stop giving fucks. If the girl wants you it's either sexual or feelings NOT your value, trust me, unless she's sociopathic, then I'd dump her. BE PICKY. BE THE DOMINATOR. ACT LIKE YOU CAN HAVE ANY OTHER CHICK EASILY, even with the shit they're giving. Fuck the shit.

_________________
LIFE IS A FUNNY MOTHARFUCKUR. ;3

You're letting THEIR insecurity become yours.

If some insecure asshole thinks girls are attracted to money, he's going to look at some broke ass guy and say "why would any girl be into him?"

If some insecure asshole thinks girls are attracted to the biggest muscles, he's going to look at some skinny guy and say "why would any girl be into him?"

You get the idea.

How would they know that those girls are out of your league? Maybe you're the next internet millionaire. Maybe you've travelled to every country in the world. Maybe you fuck like a boss. Or maybe you just know how to talk to women, make them have a good time, and they enjoy being around you.

These guys know NOTHING about you. But they think that they have more going on than you. Do they? I mean, honestly, would you want to be these other guys?

just shows how damn attractive the girl is, not how much these guys randomly hate you

they just envy you man, that's all

if you were with some uggo, no one would say shit, they just want to be you, don't take it personal

if you are going to react or what ever and say anything at all, at most just talk to the girl

''wow, guys are trying hard to get at you tonight, how'd I get so lucky haha''

if guys are tooling you hard in a social group, just roll with it and don't allow it to make you mad, just either ignore them (as long as your ego can handle it) or talk some shit back to show them that they have to risk being tooled, in order to do some tooling, and if you can tool people with the best without giving a shit about what someone says about you, you can put people in to ''be quiet mode'' but the most important thing, is just don't lose your temper, or your emotional cool, stay completely fucking dead inside or happy inside, what ever suits you (lol hopefully you're not dead inside), mad = you care, you care = what he/she is saying is actually important, between two people, the stronger frame absorbs the weaker frame, if you truly believe what he/she is saying is not important, others including that person, will start to believe it too, the more the guy/girl gets the feeling that your frame is stronger the more they will react, and feeling like you are not important or de-valued is not a good feeling, it will usually make a person angry and resentful, or insecure and quiet, but it really depends on the frame they are coming from, one of the best tactics to handle this IMO, is continue leading, but ignore the negativity as if they didn't speak, but you have to hold that frame, if you are just quiet all the time cause you are insecure you are reacting, but if someone talks some shit, and you say nothing, but while they are talking later or what ever you just keep talking and it doesn't bother you, you're value is fine, if they try to tool you again and you have something to say, and you're just like... yah sure.. cool man, and you just say what you have to say and seriously don't care, same thing, the less you react emotionally, the better

I've had a few conversations that started with some guy insulting me, my favorite is when a guy starts calling me a faggot, or trying to tool me by framing me as gay, sometimes my ego gets involved and I get into it instead of ignoring it, just to stop the behavior cause I don't want to listen to some guy pipe up and call me gay all night, you don't even have to say anything ''witty'' to beat him in a battle of wits, the strategy is just to be unoriginal, use his own insults against him, if you can't think of anything just repeat back exactly what he said in a retarded voice that mocks him, keep the focus on him and off yourself (don't answer his questions, or comply with his demands), if you don't know what to say point out what he is doing and put a negative frame on it, or agree with him and blow his words out of context, you can also strawman a guy, start a thread building him up really high, but make sure there is a negative frame associated with it (tongue in cheek/sarcasm), or you can just compliance test him (tell him what to do, the smaller the demand the better)

so for example

guy:you're a faggot
you:you're just saying that cause you want to suck my dick
guy:no blah blah blah more hateful shit about you being gay and him not being gay
you:yeah... sure thing there queer boy, lol

or the agree and blow it out of context

him:yeah well, don't front we all know you're a big loser fag
you:sure am, but you're the master, you taught me everything I know about being a big loser fag

or mocking the guy

guy:blah blah blah, gay, blah blah blah
you:blah blah blah, gay, blah blah blah, haha shut up queer boy (totally irritating high pitched immature voice)

now the thing is with this, the words don't matter, it's the guy who stays the most emotionally congruent who holds his social value, so just don't lose your cool, sometimes having some ego driven pissing contest can escalate to a fight

but there is always framing his actions as ''low value'', and the most common trolling tactics come to mind, (he can do the same thing)

him: NO, YOU'RE A FAGGOT AND RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE (raising his voice and emotionally reacting)
you: well, looks like you're getting mad, why you getting mad man? you're not gay are you?

this kinda of thing usually just leads into a pissing contest until a guy has a full blown spaz attack and either shuts up and leaves you alone (this lowers his value as long as you don't react and can still lead), or has a full blown spout of yelling (don't react, or yell with him and escalate it, just keep egging him on to get worse and worse, this also lowers his value as long as you don't react and can still lead) or he will just try to fight you (this is the downside of tooling someone, just don't fight him, don't comply with his demands, some girl you barley know is not worth getting in a fight over, and if it's your girlfriend, it's up to you... some nights suck more then others)

so basically, fights if they can be avoided, should be avoided, no one likes a broken hand, or a soar face, just because they felt they had something to prove due to big ego... but hey, it happens, no one likes to be put down and dis-respected, regardless of skill level, emotional control or what they say, unless you are a sociopath you will always care to some degree, the trick is to be as proactive as possible so that you can maintain a strong frame, and keep your emotions in check, either that or don't feed the fire