This past weekend had me INFURIATED. This one girl, this BAD Japanese/Russian HB10 not only controlled the fuck out of my frame, but she fucking destroyed it and tossed it back to me at the end of the night before sending me home.... fk.

Generally, I'm so used to be being dominant with my frame and controlling girls like my puppets. This generally works on younger girls for me. This has been happening pretty often, but with last night's experience, I feel shook and violated that somebody could take away my frame just like that.

Just some background about what's going on:
I'm 25 years old, fitness professional, and fucking aesthetic. I'll admit, I'm addicted to frame control and I fucking HATE losing the feel of losing the frame. I'd rather get all aggressive and blow a set out than be some girl's bitch.

A few weeks ago, some girl, 27 year old Asian, Teacher, had me stagnating all around her. She was grabbing my THANG from under the table in front of her friends. She lived near me, so we split a cab with her friends. Kino was high and her hands were all over me, but she wouldn't let me kiss her. I didn't go to her place, she didn't go to my place. She doesn't respond to my texts no more... oh well.

Last night, I was walking through LES and came upon this BAD 32 year old Japanese/Russian girl. OMG FUCKING BAD. Def HB10. She had her hands all over me. I totally alienated her friend, who was a 5 or 6 at most. I took her to some venue and her hands were all over me. I thought she was gonna play me and make me pay for drinks. But fuck that, she got it herself. I was trying to escalate, but she shot me down with the "I'm kinda seeing somebody back home" bs, while still feeling me up. Long story short, I think she controlled my shit and had me stringed along. At the end of the night, she just sent me home. She did text back this afternoon saying that her and her friend felt lazy during the morning, and I invited them out to Meat Packing so I can at least get her friend laid.

One thing I'm realizing is that recently, by going direct, some girls are not feeling it. Younger girls love it. But I think these older girls are not. Clearly, I've recognized I need to calibrate, and I'm trying to focus in on going indirect. But I hate fucking all the fake stories, BS, and time involved in going indirect. I want a quick fuck from a cougar type. Bascially, this girl had me in her frame and she was the one gaming me. I didn't lose any money nor did I get hurt physically, but the time I invested in that interaction was only for the sole reason of making her feel validated. With my frame destroyed like that, I feel violated and raped...

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Check out my blog: GDBCrew.com http://gdbcrew.com
Always down to sarge in NYC - Holla at me

hey man,

you seem to have the wrong idea of what frame control is,

the frame = the meaning behind the interaction

your frame = your persception of what the meaning is behind the interaction

person with frame control = person who is most sure of their frame, will eventually have others seeing the frame through their perspective, once others see things through their perspective and they are defining the meaning, they have control of the frame

you don't have to domineer people to hold court and be socially dominant, you just have to be more sure of your own reality and it all starts at an emotional level, the less reactive you are, the more clear and concise you can make your descisions congruently through your own frame, there is absolutely no need to force people to do anything or get anything from anyone, this has nothing to do with frame control, when you are in control of the frame you are merely dictating what the meaning behind the interaction is, you don't have to be domineering people to control the frame, if you say wow it's so fun to be here at this club, and what you say seems certain and congruent, then everyone understands and starts to think that club is fun, you just controlled the frame, if you ask for compliance and are met with non compliance, this by it's self has nothing to do with you losing the frame, it is the perception of why this happened that has everything to do with the frame, not the compliance it's self, it's not what you say or what you do, it's how you say it, and how you do it, and why, the person that can remain the most certain of why, can define the reason for why to others, you can even let a person talk for a long time about what they want, and simply make one comment, if you are more sure of yourself then that person, it could alter the frame completely of what has just happened

even when in control of the frame, it doesn't mean you can just get any girl you want, you can keep the frame productive to your ends, but at the same time a guy could be in frame control and frame the whole interaction negatively and fuck it up, simply having control does not = success, it merely entails that you have control to define the meaning, and it starts with being able to project your emotions on to others, the person with more emotional control, dictates the emotional state, the emotional state mixed with the outer frame work (the words that put a context to the emotions) define what the meaning is, once again the most certain person, will hold the frame, not the guy who is telling everyone what to do, or insulting everyone
chances are you are telegraphing neediness, your whole frame revolves around getting, rather then giving, just alter your perception of why you do what you do, and how people should react to what you do because of why, and you will see a shift in reactions

if you don't offer a valuable product, no one will want to invest, being able to control the frame while demonstrating a low value, will just have people resisting and not wanting to be lead by you, if you can frame things so that what you have to offer is worth buying, you can sell nearly anything, but merely being able to pitch your product through your frame does not guarentee success, especially if you frame the product as low in value

GOOD LUCK

I feel you on that
I'm re-evaluating lots of shit

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Check out my blog: GDBCrew.com http://gdbcrew.com
Always down to sarge in NYC - Holla at me

I agree with Pumpington completely.

Also your comment here was telling: When you are fixating on control above all else, this is what you end up doing to others. A girl may not have lost anything real or been hurt physically, but if at the end of the night the whole thing was about you controling her solely to bolster your own feelings of power and dominance--and yes, to make you feel validated as a man, because it seems from your post that is in large part what sex and game are about to you--Wouldn't you think she might feel violated and raped? A stupid one, probably not, or a girl who naturally tends to be submissive and likes to support a dominant role, but there are plenty out there who might have the same feeling you did.

She may have willingly had sex with you, but you never want to leave someone feeling empty and used.

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魔鬼身体

You by definition are a "natural" with women. very alpha. very aggressive. very direct. this by no means is a bad thing... but While this may work sometimes... your forgetting about building rapport, building an emotion connection, building a physical connection... ect. this takes time and yes a bit of work.

your a studly guy who has a great body, pretty face, and has used that to win over girls.... for a night. the next day they just view you as the muscle guy from the club... why??? because you dint build any rapport. thats why your girls are flaking when you text them.

now about the framing. i agree with some of the posters above. you have an idea of framing... but its not exactly clear. you need to say things, do things, run yes ROUTINES, to frame correctly. if you just go up to girls and say omg like i had to come over to u and say hi because your super pretty... the older girls for sure will toss you 2 the side... and the really hot younger ones will 2. Why??? bc they have heard it from every other dude at the club... and early at the mall... and at their work... and everywhere else. ITS OLD FOR THEM... lol. this only works on 8s and below who dont get hit on like that every day...

being a PUA is not about getting the girls number. its about building relationships with girls. any guy can get lucky and get a number and makeout with a HB7... but the true PUA will be able to see her again... and again... and again... and again.... without flaking.

GL!
Duke

I feel you guys on this. I appreciate and value all your feedback.

I've been taking my time to deload and review material - mostly indirect stuff to avoid getting too sexual too soon. One recurring issue I also see in hindsight is that I don't do enough push-pull; too much pulling and yanking. I also don't neg girls and often my friends who were nearby would tell me "Yo, that girl needed to be negged hard." Maybe I got the wrong persona going on (because I am an aesthetic sick knt after all), but I got mad girls assuming I'm stupid... anyway to play the "I'm an intellectual" card when I got this Party-Boy Aesthetic look going on?

Any source for yes routines? I was reading "How to Win Friends and Influence People" today and they mentioned to begin disagreements with a question that forces them to say "Yes" and logically maneuver them into that direction rather than disagreeing right away and butting heads.

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Check out my blog: GDBCrew.com http://gdbcrew.com
Always down to sarge in NYC - Holla at me