I was talking to a good friend of mine. He is what I consider a Natural. He worked on his confidence, and his ability to not care what people think since he was a kid. He had to to get by in his world. Today, I doesn't bother him to do anything, talk to anyone about anything, even if her doesn't know anything about the subject.
We talked about the fact that I can talk to anyone, but don't know what to say when I get there. He says it a lack of confidence, not in my ability to approach anyone but a lack of confidence to hold an interesting conversation. He says its a fear of regection for not being interesting. He instilled in me that you can be interesting with just the basics. "Hi, how are you, what do you do?" Then take the frame for there and make it yours. Own the frame. Your still in your reality, but starting to let her into your by getting to know her. Expect nothing to happen, and the most you can expect is to meet her and maybe make an acquaintence. Do get hung up on being what she wants. Be you and all you can be.
Hoch

Here is something i would also like answered. Is there a certain way to overcome that fear of rejection of not being interesting because i sometime have that problem. And it stops me from even starting a conversation. sometimes has me just sitting there saying nothing. If anyone had this same illness how did you get over it?
Highly appreciated...
Sleep

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Slap that ass and ride da wave in...

Hi Hoch and Sleep,

I personally like to combine spontaneous conversational threads where I try to control the frame with canned routines, where I know where the story will lead. I would say I try to keep it about 50/50.

But in short, I think you definitely need to have the canned threads to keep the conversation going during dry moments.

Hope this helps.


Respectfully,

M

Hey Sleep
Sometimes you just have to take your balls in your hands and say something, anything. Never worry about rejection, its going to happen. Even the best have been rejected and still get rejected once in a while. I've read a book called "Feel the Fear, Do It Anyway". It helped me alot. There are still days I draw a blank on what to say, but I just make some stuff up and see where it goes. If she rejects me, ok. No worries, move on and get the next frame on the next woman working. Or sit back a second, look at what didn't work and make improvements. Then jump back in the game.
Like Nike says, "Just Do It"
Hoch

Thx from both of you. GJ Hoch.

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Slap that ass and ride da wave in...

Just courious, what does GJ mean? Its the intials of the town I was raised. Just courious.

I'm going to assume GJ means "good job".
Just an idea.

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You can learn and learn and learn all you want... but until you go out and use it, it doesn't mean a thing.