Stuck at inner game. PLEASE HELP. :]



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PostPosted: Mon Jul 16, 2012 9:49 pm 
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Hey, guys.
I've done a TON of stuff to improve my game lately, but there seems to be a GREAT sticking point in how I could move on in my inner game.

I need to stop thinking about what others might think and might say about me, aswell as I need to notice the moment of NOW more (I keep getting into a thought-trance and it really drags down my game.).

Has anyone got any advice on how I could achieve this?
NLP? (Any beneficial beliefs?)

It would be awesome if the method would be joined with fun or making fun of something.

Would acting funny about the things I notice be a good way? I've already tried this a few times but I just keep getting myself into the thought-trance. :roll:

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 3:03 am 
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I've found that the best way to NOT give a shit about what people say or think, is to understand WHY it's beneficial to only listen to and take advice from people who have what you want.

How many friends do you have that live by the "I don't give a shit what you say" mentality? For me, I realized that MOST of the things people say are just OPINIONS and not fact.

I only listen to people I look up to and respect. Everyone else is probably just as confused as the next guy. Who are the guys you look up to that are around you?


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 11:02 am 
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Thanks, zlibby76.

But my problem is a bit different, I always search to be praised by others.
I want to be the best in their eyes and that seems to be a bad thing, because I just start creating myself the way THEY want to see me, the way THEY would like me.
This really hinders my creativity because I start thinking in the box and it's impossible to get out of.

Also, honestly not many people to look UP to for me.

Anyways, I added some of the stuff you said to my mind map, it's really useful for me, Thanks. :wink:

...lol I think I just fixed my first problem. It's funny how I have 2 characters, one of them lives in games, he's a fucking natural PUA but the one irl is an AFC. I have a ridiculously stupid mind.
Belief: I should create myself the way I think I would live and enjoy my life better.

Still needing help with the thought-trance. ;[

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 6:03 pm 
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You are more stuck on the idea of change than actually changing. Changing is an act that can be measured for it's progress. Telling yourself that you need to be something will never help. You have to experiment! No change happens by yourself. You have to have a good environment were people enjoy your company. A true sense of place to fall back on. Like this place I guess, but I prefer also having real people in my life that like me more than I like myself. Rise above the ego, focus on EMPATHY as Niel Strauss says "It's the key". Fuck what and who you are. Where is our choice anyway? Why do we protect what we didn't create? This body, these looks, this personality. Don't protect it, BE it. I didn't make my DNA, my anxiety problems etc. So I'll throw what I don't want out, and keep the best parts. We are totally, by nature, allowed to do so. Don't over think! I promise that if you focus on others happiness, you'll get it all back!

Practice by imagining yourself outside of yourself, above the situation. I did this the other day at a coffee shop with a girl and ended up being smooth as if I were acting in a movie. I got everything right because I chose not to be completely immersed in the situation. I didn't feel I needed to validate myself and it that I ended up being validated. I even told her, thinking about being outside of myself when I started, that "I live in the stars. It's peaceful there....by the way, we are all stardust" And created a whole routine on the spot (that I'm now trying to perfect) haha.

It turned out that she loved star wars and we talked about that and she gave me her number to hang some time.

Live in the stars, not in your body.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 6:47 pm 
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You never mentioned the guys you look up to. You can come here and post that you want help, and I'm suggesting that the REAL help comes from being around people that have what you want.

IF you haven't been around the kinds of guys that "get it", then TO ME that's something to focus on. Focus on asking for help from guys around your "physical" domain, and ask them if you can find out HOW they're doing what they're doing that's making them successful.

Gemini is absolutely right when he says that "change" happens with action. He may have downplayed the importance of the "think it and it will come" idea, and I'd like to add that 'thinking it' DOES make a HUGE difference. Once you think about what you want, HOW are you 'acting' on those thoughts?

Have you ever walked to someone and asked them to help you understand something?


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 7:30 pm 
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Book a flight to South Africa and travel.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 8:11 pm 
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Wow, THANKS GUYS!
I think, after a while of doing some thinking myself and adding Zlibbys and Geminis thoughts together I've finally overcome my situation.

The stuff I found out on my own was this little question:
What can I do with my life/the world right now?
I just ask that to myself whenever I feel down etc.

Also, that, probably, was the last step that I needed to take.

Thanks, Thanks, Thanks. :mrgreen:

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 17, 2012 10:51 pm 
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Cool. Glad to help!

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