Alright so this past saturday i went to a club for someones 18th birthday party. I was flirting with this one girl in particular, touching her a bit and i bought her a shot or two. Things were going good and she invited me back to her house (I didnt go cus her parents were home). Anyways it turns out its one of my little sisters friends and shes pretty hot maybe a 7, i dunno.

So fast forward to last night when i was driving my friend and some fat kid to a party. In the car i told them what had happened at the club while we were talking. So it turns out the girl is there, i approached her several times but she wasnt drunk like last time and i couldnt keep a good conversation going, i would just run out of things to say. So then i see this fat kid (who i told that i wanted to get some action from this girl tonight) talking to her. Now this is the type of guy that will tell girls anything and i know that he told her wat my intentions were because next time i appraoched her and tried to put my arm around her she walked away (i know embarassing). So Can you guys tell me what I should of done.

I know my chances with this girl are done, i dont really care about that but i wanna learn from my failure.

Should i have not approached her so many time?
Should i have let her approach me( she did at the club)?
What should i have talked about to make her laugh?

I also learned not to tell anyone who you're interested in cus they try to steal the girl or fuck shit up for you.

Any comments appreciated.

Yeah, you kind of messed up a little bit but its alright you just have to learn from it. Definitely don't tell anyone about your intentions with a girl unless its your wing because most guys are assholes even if they are your "friends". If you don't have a trust worthy wing, get one.

You probably should have talked to her about something interesting and non-threatening. Ask her to help you settle an argument you and your fiends have been having. I like to ask "What would be easier to catch, a monkey or a human". You can bag on them about whatever their answer is. Its a no win argument that can spark a large debate, and then just switch it over to other conversation or do a comfort building exercise like the Cube or Styles EV. Look at some of the threads about this shit and if you haven't read the Game and the Mystery Method, read them and watch some clips online of Neil Strauss and Mystery talking and just pick up on their body language.

After conversation runs dry with the girl or if she shows any IOD (indication of disinterest) move to a set of girls or guys/girls within visible distance from your target and just work on them while ignoring your target. It should make her jealous and add to your value because she sees that other girls are into you. As you walk between groups of people just pat her on the back and keep walking and ignoring her. It'll make her notice you but notice that you "don't care" about her. You can then wait for her to come back to you or go back to her and say how everyone disagrees with you about the monkey or whatever. The key is to have high value and make her think you are a cool guy who she should be after.

Well telling the fat kid your intentions was your first mistake. Unless he is your wing then he is potential competition. So don't make the mistake of underestimating him because of weight. I've seen fat guys pull tens man, you need to remember looks aren't important to women. So basically you need to work on your material and possibly get a wing that can watch your approach and help you out. Your probably are also doing things wrong you don't even notice yet. If you approach one time and get blown out then come back to try again that lowers your value. Not only in her eyes but to everyone else in the room. Practice on another girl build social proof then wave her over to talk later don't make yourself look like a low value guy.

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http://www.realpuas.com

To try and seperate things i wana say this.

NEVER tell people what your intentions are sexually with whom your not gonna be actually having them with.

The reason for this is it comes accross as sleezy, the girl will get wind of it, and when she does you lose automaticlly.

Its not the intrest in her that shuts her down, its the assumption you make that she is willing to return the intrest, sexually.

Its OK to tell people you have an intrest in someone, but keep it short. Do NOT tell them in a way that seems like your assuming a returned intrest or like your bragging about the interaction.

Ive told friends before i like a girl and they a few days later she aproaches me clearly displaying intrest...because i was discrete in what i said to my friends and what they tell her just gives her the greenlight to display her intrest in you.

This type of indirect aproach is a lil AFC, but if like you said you have already aproached and built a little attraction then its ok.

_________________
-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."

Alright thanks for the replies. Yea i couldnt keep conversations going at all, it sucked. Can you guys link me to good material on conversation. I find whenever i ask a question i always get a short answer from them and then im just like "yea cool", then im stumped. I know i should have stopped appraoching her cus she didnt seem too interested but i was drunk and well, what can you do.

When having a conversation, if you run out of things to say and find yourself asking questions to fill space, here are some suggestions...

-Use the questions in more of a game format (Do you have any phobia's...if you tell me your ill tell you mine, OR What are your biggest goals...tell you what to be fair we will go one for one on this, you give me one ill give you one).

-When she responds use her response for you to launch into a story. Ask yourself how what she just said relates to you and your life.

-Save canned material like games, tricks, etc for when you dont have something to converse over, this will help fill the gaps and allow you time to come up with or create a topic of convo.

Hope this helps.

_________________
-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."