So I've been seeing this girl like 2 month now. She sleeps over at my place, sometimes I sleep over at hers. We are both 17. No sex yet, she believes in marriage before we stuff. 

Either way yesterday I talked to her about making the relationship exclusive. Even though we are not gf an bf we do everything as if we are. Like see each other 5 times a week & stuff. But when I told her that, she didn't want to make it exclusive. She was like its not gonna change anything but a title, yet could bring problems. Plus guys hit her up all the time, especially her ex ( he still loves her). So what should I do, I feel like the title would make a difference[/quote]

to be honest, i've found that labels complicate - and often ruin - things.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Yeah just forget about the title, leave that shit for the birds man. I made this mistake a few months ago. I made the decision to make things exclusive and should have left it as friends. I actually made a post about this earlier this month.

Also she may not want to be exclusive because she is still in love or cares about her ex. She may still be talking or dealing with him, and using you to fill that void until they get back together or something. Im not saying this is true, but make sure you are paying attention to this. Always have your gaurd up in situations like these.


FYI....
Dude if you want sex now and she isnt trying to give it to you. Let her know you guys can still kick it, but you are going to be seeing other girls. Let her know that you have different values and don't believe that sex has to wait till marriage.

UNLESS you really want her, and you have the same belief that she has, but don't just settle. Stay focused on what you want, and GO FOR IT. Trust m

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Thank you both!

Alright I'll leave the label alone. And ye k really want her so I'll just stick to dating only her. It's just I have issues of trust where sometimes I feel like she don't wanna kick it with me( idk why I can't seem to get that point) but she told me countless times she has no feeling for her ex, though he still loves her( she even showed me a message where she tells him she has a new "boo" and everything.

Also her bestfriend (we used to talk) hates the fact in with her an is always telling her im a player and everything.. ( I was but I kept on telling her I dropped that)

How many times are you going to post this same question using different wording?

Your boy,
870

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"Do not blame, call out, alpha male, superman, or water sprinkle any hoes. And what will be, will be." -Hobbit

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Well in this situation you are going to need to TRUST man. Thats what dating, and relationships involve. If she doesn't want to hang with you as much, maybe she wants space, or she may be scared you may get tired of her by seeing or spending to much time together. i've had chicks like this before. You must give her her space and let her realize that its pushing you away rather than bringing you closer to her. UNLESS she has some shit going on with her ex, but i suspect she doesn't. You MUST be willing to lose her. Thats just how it works man. If you are to pressed, you will give her power.

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a "title" will not change anything if she still loves her ex. dumping a boyfriend is a very easy thing to do if there is no emotional attachment.
if she has commitment issues (i.e. she is afraid of commitment but if she were to commit, it would be to you and nobody else), then there are ways to overcome that, provided she likes you enough and you are ready to risk losing her.
if she has commitment-to-you issues (i.e. she is ok with commitment, just not to you), that's a different story.

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nice guys don't get laid
"It's disrespectful not to bang them when they sleepover." (Hellhound)

Listen you man, right now you don't have jack shit with this girl! you are not getting sex (which at 17 is normal by the way) and you have no real "title" although a title might not change much....so you are basically her "beta best friend" who she uses when she is bored or lonely, and once a alpha comes along who she likes more then you she will drop you like a bad habit!

Next time you see her you should tell her "listen I like you a lot, but it is clear that you and I are not on the same page as far as what we want in our relationship, You want to be just friends so us hanging out and sleeping over can no longer happen, we should stop hanging out and end this thing we have going on" she will probably be cool with it at first, that is because she will think you are bluffing, wait a couple days, she will tell you how much she misses you and wants to hang out and which point you tell her "I already have plans that night, have to go"...make real plans, go out with the boys, go hit on girls and let her see you hanging out with other women.

Trust me man what you are doing now is just digging a hole! By the way you are only 17 and I know you think "I like this girl so much" but chances are you wont date her after high school so just enjoy your youth! have fun and don't worry so much!

If I understand correctly you asked her to be boyfriend and girlfriend and she said: "it's only going to bring problems". And you seem to take the fact that other guys hit on her as some sort of reason. You're in acceptance of the fact that she's waiting for better guys to come along!

She's not that into you, when a girl really likes a guy she'll do anything to make him her boyfriend. You say you are sticking to dating only her, but she has different thoughts. This is beginning to look like oneitis.

Stop acting clingy (don't see her 5 times a week) and start flirting with some other girls you like. The way to get the girl in this situation is NOT by giving her more attention without getting sex.

And can you define 'no sex yet'? (the degree in which you guys are sexual is the best indicator of attraction in my opinion)

+1


That's the point i was trying to make...DONT GET ONE-ITIS!

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