Help guys I need to stop this behavior, but first a litte background.
My girl knew a guy over myspace and facebook, for a long long time, and in some way he was the kind of guy that she was attracted to (Physically) cause she says she wouldn't have a relationship with him, it would've been just sex.
So, a few months ago, she met him in person, she didn't meet him alone, or set up a date, it was like a coincidence, we were at the mall and saw him at his work, and he talked to her blah blah.
From that day on, my jealousy started, this was rougly 1 month ago, 1 and a half. He started telling her things, that he had always been atracted to her, that he found her beautiful, he wanted to have sex with her... well, things like that, and it got me so fucking jealous, the fact that my girlfriend couldn't say no to his proposals, BUT she never actually met him.
So a lot of things happened, then roughly 3 weeks ago, she deleted him from Facebook, and he didn't realized until yesterday when he sent her a message telling her that.
He also sent her an email, I saw the email, and saw the last replies, where she kept telling "yes" to him.. but again, never saw him.. the last message from her, was one day before she erased him.
This affected me.. seeing that message.
I talked to one of her best friends, a guy that knows her in and out, and he said, that along the years, he had noticed that she tells everyone things, and then she hopes for the guys to forget about it, and when they don't (Like this guy) it turned out into a complete mess, the end for us was near.
So, maybe then when she truly saw the end near, she finally decided to learn to say "no" ... it affected me seeing a message almost a month old, the same day when she deleted him.
I know I have my reasons to be jealous, but she has also done a lot of things, and she says she doesn't know what else to do. She erased him, she stopped contact, everything, and I still got affected by this message, old message.
I need to stop this, I need to forget that matter, yes I know she lied to me, and covered it up, she apologized, she changed her behavior, but why can't I let go yet? Why does it still affects me? I have forgived her, but I can't let go completely, sometimes I remember and go all quiet.
What can I do guys?

Jealousy can be a self fulfilling prophecy. Your own jealous behaviour can often cause what you are so afraid of to come true.

This isn't really the place to come to find out why you cannot overcome your jealous. Perhaps try a therapist if it's really serious.

Maybe you're right, they say the jealous doesn't get jealous for what he sees, but for what he imagines.
I'm having a hard time letting go, and obviously she gets upset, because she has done everything she can to take this guy out of our lives, I mean, how much does she really care about him, if she erased him without a doubt.
The problem is I'm having a hard time forgiving and forgetting.

Let it go Decessum, jealously and insecurity will kill your relationship quicker than cheating on her. Not only will festering about this eat you up inside, it will destroy her attraction/interest level and increase HIS value.

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Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. - Robert Greene

I discovered what was eating me and was keeping me from letting go:
I wanted her to understand how I had felt, and the pain that I went through, I asked her some questions like:
If I had done that would it have hurt you? And she said yes, I just wanted her to understand how I had felt, and now that she got it, I feel like I can finally move on with this.

I know it feels good to tell your girl what is bothering you and to hear she understands but please do not be naive and believe what they say, ONLY look at their actions.

Forgive but don't forget, if this was my girlfriend i would tell her that i feel like she disrespected me and i find this very unattractive in a girl, if she does shit like this again i would hard next her ass.

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Do not make external things like girls define your happiness or you will live a harsh life. Keep doing what you love and keep improving as a man.

Yeah I actually told her that, the very day it happened, and since that day she actually did changed her behavior. I know it, but she was the kind of girl that didn't know how to say "no".. and she hoped for people to forget about it. The first time (And last time) I allowed her to do that, I told her how I felt it was a huge disrespect, and she agreed with me, changed her behavior. I think, that by seeing that message I just remembered everything that I went through and affected me.

This is exactly why you should of listened to us on here and chucked her the first time she said yes to this guy regardless of if she's met him or not

Its not entirely your fault you are jealous I would be a little like that if I saw the same on my girls phone, the difference being I'd of dumped her on the spot and wouldn't be in this situation now

This is exactly why you should of listened to us on here and chucked her the first time she said yes to this guy regardless of if she's met him or not

Its not entirely your fault you are jealous I would be a little like that if I saw the same on my girls phone, the difference being I'd of dumped her on the spot and wouldn't be in this situation now

I'm not sure I understand. What exactly was she saying "yes" to? Did she actually tell the guy in the email that she would have sex with him?

If so, dump her. She knew when she was typing those words that you would be hurt, make no mistake. She didn't care about you at the time, and if you hadn't caught her up who knows what may have happened. She was thinking about him pumping her full of his man juice.

If a girl is with you, and making arrangements or agreements to have sex with another man, she is not one to keep around. What happens next time when you don't catch her? Being in the pickup community, you probably know that "no" means "yes" a lot of the time. I shouldn't have to tell you though that "yes" means "yes" virtually EVERY TIME.

Just as Napoleon Hill said in his book "Think and Grow Rich", everything you see in this world, no matter how great, began with an idea. I don't know if that's a good analogy but if she will fantasize about cheating on you, and the fantasy is so agreeable that she tells the other guy "yes", she will cheat on you. She cheated inside her mind already, and actions stem from thoughts.

Maybe I'm taking this the wrong way, but I have been cheated on before so I'm a little over sensitive to cheating behaviour. I know from personal experience that once a woman takes that step, she no longer has any respect for you whatsoever, and anything you do to try and "win her back" will only make you feel the fool in the end. Once a cheater, always a cheater.

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"I've got hair on my face to hide my soul."
"I already told you that you're ugly and not that cool." -Sixty Years of Challenge

if you cant trust her to say no to a guy on fb then how can you trust her to say no when some guy comes upto her in a club, just dump her like you should of the first time you seen what she had been saying

To be honest, I never felt a true threat on her cheating on me, but I just hated the fact that other guy was probably making fun of me saying on his head "Oh I will fuck your girlfriend" .. Maybe, seeing all those messages, made me imagine that she would do it, and that's what causes jealousy, what I imagine, and made me act crazy.

Thanks for the advice, I did realized that I deserve something better, so I am giving her the chance to act better, but I am confident, that if shit like this happens again, I will leave her, because I won't tolerate it. I know of at least 5 girls that would love to have sex with me, hell, I even erased one of those, but I know I can get more.

I will try to act like Flume says, and that was my behavior, but this shit got the best of me, I will regain control on this relationship.

Thanks everyone!

This ^

I have been in this situation before, in my younger years when I was stupid. The more you accuse her of shit, the more you drive her away and the more likely it is that she will actually cheat. And at the same time, you come across as a needy AFC, which decreases your value.

You just have to learn not to base your happiness around anyone else but yourself. Sure, it sucks if your GF cheats, but someone with a healthy attitude will move on pretty quickly and not let it affect them for long. The best way to get over one chick is to find another.

Dude, you make me want to throw rocks at you! You are done, or rather she is done and just has not let you know yet...She still has a safety net with you and until she does not feel the need for that net, she will stay with you.

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Crypto...
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All girl's are Freaks...It is your job to bring it out in them! - Crypto

You need to stop bending over and letting her ass fuck your brain! - Heywood