We live together. We used to spend alot of time together outside of work. Recently I got a gym membership and started working out every other day. She is cool with this. I dont have a facebook. We where hanging out on the couch and she was facebooking on her laptop. I was sitting next to her. She uploaded a new picture and one of her coworkers commented on it calling her hot, with a heart. That combined with her not having sex with me for over a week (usually we have sex multiple times a week) has me thinking that shes cheating. Jealousy? Being Beta? She keeps saying im being cold. She wants to be close, but doesnt want to have sex. I hate feeling like this. what do you guys think is goin on?

Dude shes denying you sex, that's not acceptable. Whatever you do, dont let that go on very long, or you are going to be made a fool of.

A weeks not a long time for a woman. Especially if you are being AFCish wondering what she is up to. Guys do make comments on fb. She could be or could not be cheating who knows. I don't think you have anything to go on or any proof. Let it go incase you are wrong and just keep your eyes open. If she was banging her co worker he would know about you and not to post on her fb or what ever. He's just making a comment.

No sex is a sign of a failing relationship. Worry after a month. She could have feminine problems. A girl I'm seeing is putting things off a week now for that reason. I believe her, she is all over me and sexually frustrated.

Don't stress over cheating. Either you don't put up with it and she is gone. Like legit gone, not playing games hoping she will learn her lesson. Just give her the boot. Or if you can handle it, make it an open relationship. Don't bother trying to control her or the situation.

I think you are over reacting though. I hope you didn't accuse her. If there isn't enough reason to suspect and she didn't do anything wrong you will come off way needy.

Like I said a week is nothing. If last week she was banging you like mad that's a good sign.

Yeah I wouldnt worry if its a week. If she wants to be close then give her it! Cuddle her! Get her flowers. Write her a romantic note. Do something with the frame of not wanting anything back.

I've dated a couple girls where that's all it took to get her horny again. Just that security of knowing you love her and care for her.

BUT the previous poster is correct. If you get all romantic like and after a month there is nothing. Something is most def up. I had a girl cheat on me once and she used to play it off as she "just wasn't in the mood lately". When I knew for a fact she was the horniest girl in the world. And when I would ask her things about what she was up to she would say things along the lines of "are you the police" "are you my dad?". These usually are tell tale lines of guilt.

After posting this, I had a talk with her. She is going through some emotional stuff with because of her abusive relationships in the past. We talked and then had amazing sex. Ive been cheated on. I have also been with girls that are in relationships or even engaged. Its fucking with my head. I dont want to be that guy that gets made a fool of. I also dont want to cheat on her because I do love her, and if she is faithful, I dont want to break her heart (bahahaha, fuck off, I love her). I want to be with her but I dont want this to be fake. to be a sham. Love sucks.

The thing I've learned about cheating is that it's something that you can't control. If a girl's going to cheat on you, she'll cheat on you. There's nothing you can really do about it. All you can do is be the best boyfriend you can be, which will just reduce the odds that she does cheat on you.

Best thing to do is just accept that you can't stop her from doing it. If you can do this, any jealous behaviour is eliminated, which is often a big cause of cheating. Keep an eye on her. If she acts out of line or actually cheats, reprimand/break up with her. But you mustn't get jealous or cold over nothing, it's simply counter-productive and ironically, often causes cheating.

I definately feel something, it is probably jelousy...She knows it too. She asks me "whats going on" I dont say anything because I dont want to come off as a chump and call her out if its not true. At the same time if it is, or could be, Id be a chump. and Im not. So I want to cheat. But I dont want to hurt her. It is a vicious cycle. Bottom line: what you are suggesting is accept that I cant control it and if I love her, then love her until its a fact that she cheated on me.

This guy just gave you all the advice you need.

Your boy,
870

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really? lol. not having sex over a week happens. its no big deal. then because she was on facebook and a guy comments on it you think shes cheating? wow you are insecure. if your girl is good looking it's expected that guys will come on to her. just keep being confident and the guy that attracted her in the first place

That was inspirational in a sad way hehe... But its true, if a girl wants to cheat on you, she will do it, like my gf said when I called her out on some FB messages "If I wanted I would be meeting him, and any other guy I wanted to, but I don't want to" ...

I just don't actually get it, maybe Im not used to it, when you say not get jealous: some girls actually take that as a sign that you don't care for them, couldn't it actually turn around to bite you? Most girls I've been with have said a time I get jealous has been "cute".. but maybe there's the psycho jealous and the cute jealous. Guys have said to me I should act like I don't care when she shows me her FB messages (Which she does) .. or even act as if I didn't cared when she tells me that X Guy sent her a message .. Couldn't this also be interpreted as a sign of "I don't care" ... and will cause her to actually not feel, like you care?

I get the "Be the best boyfriend you can be"... I still believe that a person can be 100% faithful in a relationship, maybe not mentally, but I have known couples that have been together for a really long time without cheating, at least its my mindset .. I don't see the point in cheating.

if shes showing you her facebook messages thats fucked up. shes likely testing you and want to get a reaction from you. my girlfriend and has never showed me anything from facebook or whatever its a shit test if she shows you shes talking to a guy. or shes just fucking crazy

Re-reading this, I laughed at myself. I did some meditating and this is probably me looking for an out because im scared. I expect her to cheat on me because then it would be OK for me to get back into pickup and enjoying the single life. Why am I scared. Because being in a relationship with her makes me feel happy and content with life. I feel like im settling down. Shes been over to my parents and they love her. They joked about us having kids and being grandparents. I had the talk with her and she told me she doesnt want a kid for years (im glad because that scared the shit out of me). This is the first serious relationship ive been in. The first relationship that has lasted for longer then a one night stand, then 6 months, the first relationship where I count our time together in years, not months or lays. I want our relationship to work out, and if it wont, I want it to end now. The advice everyone is giveing me can be summed up in: enjoy my time with her day by day and focus on that. Know that I cant keep her from doing things. Enjoy the fact that she choses to be with me, to live with me, to put up with and even be attracted to all of the dorky things I do. Thanks for listening to my story and sharing your input.

Se7in

you don't known how to be in a relationship. you need to develop those skills.
also I bet she knowns something going on. you are demonstrating insecurity.

New relationships are the number one thing that hinders my game. I go from being the pimp who has all the options to suddenly having to deal with an entirely different reality. I have trust issues too because I know what women are like. I start Choding myself out. And more often women do the same thing.