Ok so basically i was watching my sister in a show and new i was going out for her birthday after.... It just so happens the whole crew came..
I was being Mr sociable dhv'ing the bar chatting to girls and 2bh on this night i had no real agenda to pick up i was having a great time... I sat down for a break randomly next to one of the dancers... basically we hit it off i passed the ultimate shit tests by having a pick up competition with her! We had a great night.
Fist date went great comedy club then to a bar and stayed at my mates... didn't sleep with her.... second thirs fourth date i didn't establish any sexual dominance i failed to sleep with her and barely kissed her..... Yes i made the old onitus mistake and put her on a pedistal.
However she's stuck around we've had sex a few times been extreemly shit, i let my insecurities take over and i stopped a few times while we were having sex..... After reading the first section of sex god i realise how fucked up my programming and stuff was and how dominant i need to be.... sex is psychological no physical.... so i know given time i could turn it around.
However after the last fuck up of sex i went back to uni for a week and she asked me to help her with thsi night out thing.... but she said i couldn't stay with her after as she had just got back from germany and would be tired....however ofcourse if things were right she wouldn't say this.... then on the night out whilst she was working and in uniform i tried to kiss her a few times and she was like not now im working....... I opened upto her about the way i felt and was honest about how things had gone wrong on this night out....probs not the right time but i got a little drunk! She was really nice about it spent alot of time with me looked at me in a loving way . as we said goodbye she said she'd call me to talk tomorrow.
She didn't so i left it as i dont wanna come across as needy she text me at midnight that night... asking if i was ok..... i didn't text back till the next morning (today) all i said was ye im ok you ok.... as i was expecting more from her! She hasn#t responded!
Could someone tell me what the hell is going on here.... If i can save it and how?

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Aristotle: We are what we repeatedly do. Therefore excellence is not an act but a habbit

You failed to establish that dominance then, and thats whats hurting you now. You need to ask the pros on how to get her crawling back to you so that way you ultimately have control.

The bad sign is, she told you shed call, and she didnt. She texts with minimum effort too. The only way i know of on how to fix that is if she takes a step in that direction , you need to take two steps in that same direction. Always be winning the game.

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Romaniac

HAHA yeah i got ditched....but i leanr alot so it's all good!
Thats the last time i get oneitus Next girl....

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Aristotle: We are what we repeatedly do. Therefore excellence is not an act but a habbit

Thats the attitude i like to see

Whenever you're gaming a girl, simplify your perception of the entire dynamic with her. So in your case, this is obviously just a lack of interest. Don't think:

"Hmm why isn't she putting effort into texting"
"Why didn't she call me when she said she would?"
"Why isn't she letting me kiss her?"

There aren't specific reasons for each of these; they can all be attributed to a lack of attraction. That's all you need to know. And how is attraction increased? By being a dominant, confident, charming guy who is a CHALLENGE to her. If you make it too easy, she no longer chases you. Be a guy that other women want to fuck, women love the challenge of trying to keep a guy to themselves.

Remember this: The ultimate goal of seduction is to get the seduced into thinking they are the ones doing the seducing. Even though YOU'RE pursuing a girl, you essentially want to arrange it so that SHE'S pursuing you.

Your Oneitis is coming from a lack of other options. Your mind is perceiving whatever it already has, and what it is already invested into, as inflated in value.
Try and avoid this type of thinking. Simply phrasing it like that, "what the hell is going on?" not only complicates a simple situation, but indirectly pedestalizes her. It puts her actions under a light of mystery and bewilderment. The attitude you want to adopt is of amused mastery, an aloof detachment that communicates to her that you DON'T care - that you are outcome independent. As you think, you shall become; the more you THINK that women are unpredictable and arcane in their ways, the more you ACT like you don't know what you're doing. When you THINK they are predictable and easy, you ACT more confident and dominant because you believe it.

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My Blog: www.solvemygirlproblems.com

Wrong thread at a wrong section! Please move this to another Forum... Thanks!

I actually learned quite a bit on this subject the past 6 months with this girl I dated. I in the beginning, I was carefree and had the attitude that I could care less if she left. She expressed this to me multiple times throughout our relationship during the first 6 months ("Why is it so easy for you to leave?!"). The truth is I felt superior to her in the beginning. I felt like she was just for the time being and I was open to the fact of having someone better come along. The Sex was whenever and however I wanted it. The relationship was extremely disfunctional throughout the 6 months and I believe that she was classified as a "freak". The unfortunate thing of it all was I froze her out after 6 months for a week for what I thought was being to "clingy". We didn't talk for a week and she txted me saying how she felt. Without knowing it I played my cards right and kept the freeze going. I screwed up once I re-ingaged a couple days later. I started to get the feeling she was moving on and this made me instantly "Beta". I basically did everything wrong for the past month (buying her gifts, begging/pleading, crying, dropping everything i was doing for her, etc). I remember her telling me it was weird because it's like it was everything she wanted me to do from the beginning. I think she was thinking logically when she told me this. The problem is her attraction took a turn for the worse. We have not had any sex since the freeze out. This tells me everything I need to know. I caught oneitus the past month and did everything wrong. Through Frustration of not knowing what to do, AKA not being in control of the situation, I probably pushed her away for being too clingy. I'm now trying to salvage my self-respect and I'm now in the process of freezing her out to get my mind clear and possibly move on for good. It has been just a week and I have gotten some txts from her which appear to be feeler txts. I'm not sure where they will go, but I vow to never turn back to my beta-ish ways. I learned a great deal from this experience and will carry it into my relationship. I carry a little hope of us talking again (I miss the sex! ) but I know as soon as I start moving forward with someone else it will fix this. I know she is wrong for me in every form. Lol. The funny thing is I drew up a Pros/Cons sheet and Sex, Companion, Loves to Travel and Eat are the only Pros I could come up with. I can have that with anyone! Oneitus is no joke! The challenge I face now is finding the fine line between being Alpha and being an Asshole. The other thing that bothers most men is the unfair natural tilt women have in moving on. When a guy gets oneitus he has to start from scratch and step his game up. A woman can easily get hit on to help curb her oneitus.

Hey dude that last post was good to read..... I've moved on since been out tearing it up and been on like 4 dates, but i've felt like im losing myself in it all! Sometimes i wonder whether i'll ever truly get this side of game if i'm honest.

I'm an extremely passionate person and when i set my mind to something it's all or nothing i don't do things half heartedly. I think for me to change it's more of a change of perspective and a re-invention of character and moral beleifs. which im completely confused about!

I don't want to let go of my morals beliefs and values just because it's gonna help me pick up women, but i can't be sure that my own morals and beliefs are innately hardwired or that of social programming.

Either way i can still become more dominant than i am most definitly sexually. I'm just not sure seeing loads of girls at the same time does it for me..... I feel innately monogomous i guess and i find it more of a strain to see lots of girls that i don't particuarly like just to ensure i dont get oneitus. The truth is i want Oneitus!

Maybe my parents screwed me up or theres a hormone inbalance hahah who knows! thanks for the advice tho guys i always appreciate it!

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Aristotle: We are what we repeatedly do. Therefore excellence is not an act but a habbit