I've just read this whole post and I can't help thinking that playing a relationship game like this is pretty immature.

Why do you want a relationship? You're presumably looking for a girl you could spend years, if not all of your life with (think cohabiting, kids, marriage). Given that assumption this girl seems like a bad choice. Do you really want this drama and hassle? If you have to play a game like this to keep her then that's a total ball ache. Do you really want to be doing this a year or more from now? Plotting your next move. Strategising. Intentionally being seen with other girls to make her jealous. Why are you playing such a complex game to get someone who sounds like a pain in the ass back into your life? What's so special about this one?

To me this sounds like an inner game issue. It's a good thing that your girlfriend sees you get female attention but this should come from having great female friends not being 'accidentally' seen picking up girls in a bar. Lots of needy texts in a day when she didn't get back to you. She could of lost her phone... That would of made you look like a tool. I reckon you need to have more things going on in your own life (sports, hobbies, business, travel, friends) so you don't get so obsessed about a girl.

It sucks that I'm going through this, but I love this girl. I'm doing all this hoping that we'll be serious and she won't take me for granted. Maybe I'm going about it all wrong, but its getting her attention.

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Tryna "Wife" Them Bad Girls

It's obviously getting her attention, at great cost to you. You're exhausting a ton of energy on a game, that at the end of the day has no real reward. It might work for another six months or so, but I would expect the same 'need time' line in the future.

I guess this game is fine if you really don't care, you do... I would be much more interested in the other woman you're being seen with.

women make up shit all the time. when they say they "need a break" or they "dont want a bf right now" thats womenese for 'I am losing interest in you" or "I lost interest in you." Meanwhile if it gets worse she will be sneaking around with other guys while you wait around during her me time. I suggest you back off a little and do give her some room. Try to be more spontaneous, dont always accept her offers to hang out or go on dates. It's ok to say no every once in awhile. Keep yourself busy.

I agree with wolf. I've been in the same situation. Cut the ties now man. Go out and game. She does not sound worth it at all, she sounds dramatic and manipulative and thinks you'll come back if she leaves.

All it comes down to is that I love this girl. I left the game for her and I want to be with her for the long term. I've been playing the games that i have so that she can see I'm capable on my own and that I don't need her. I really don't need her, but I want to be with her. A lot of girls who are way better looking than her are interested in me, but I still want her. This goes way beyond looks.

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Tryna "Wife" Them Bad Girls

Nines&Dimes, i know exactly how you feel, man. i'm in the "need time/break" situation as well right now. she has a lot of shit in her life now, true, but i know for a fact it was cuz she lost interest. i was maybe a little needy at first, but totally cut it off for over a week now. she's not one to ever text first, but i know her and her friends have told me she's itching a little. we live in different parts of the city so not probable we will be running into each other very much right now, but just in case i will keep your success so far at the front of my mind.

if you know you want this chick, don't get too discouraged. i mean maybe it isn't the best situation for you, but if you made the decision then be confident. besides, does anyone here REALLY want to settle down with someone who doesn't keep you on your toes?

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-Phoenix

GAME OVER

Well boys, I delivered a finishing blow to this situation and it appears that I am officially back in the game. I do not really want to be, but it is what it is.

I let my emotions get the best of me and I basically destroyed everything that I was working towards. But as many of you have pointed out, she probably isn't worth it and is a wast of time and energy.

I started to get fed up with her because I felt she was just using me for emotional support or whenever she got lonely. So I decided to wager all my chips for one final move that I was hoping would have a positive outcome. I told her that we needed to have a talk and so we met up at her house. Basically I said to her that I felt that being in contact with her and hanging out with her once in awhile wasn't doing either of us any good. All it did was lead me on to believe that something more would come of it and it was stopping her from the the space and "me" time that she asked for. So I told her that I don't wish to continue seeing her in person and that contact through the cell phone should be little to non existent.

The next night she texts me "I really need my pillow back" followed by a phone call. She left her tempurpedic pillow at my house and has been bugging me to get it back. Well since I don't want to have contact with her, I figured I should take the pillow with me so I can give it to her so she can stop asking me about it.

I see her out at the bar the next night and she leaves as soon as I show up. I had my suspicions as to why that was, because she never just leaves like that. Well later on in the night I decide to pass by her house so I can give her the pillow. I was going to call her when I got there and if she didn't pick up I was just going to leave it on her porch or something in a plastic bad and text her that I left it for her.

When I show up to her house, her ex boyfriends car is parked in the driveway. I fuckin snapped! I absolutely despise this kid. I had already got into a fight with him like 5 weeks ago because he was talking shit outside of the bar. And the other reason it made me so mad is because of how hypocritical she was. All she did was talk about how much she hated him and how he was an abusive bf who cheated on her at least 4 times that she knows of. And that he had a bad coke habit. So I am like why the fuck would she want anything to do with this guy?!

Well, I went on to send her these texts. Mind you I was in a rage and had been drinking a little.

"Fuck you cunt. I hope you u and ur prince charming have the perfect life together. I fuckin hate you. Never talk to me again."

"Ur dead to me bitch"

"U disgust me. Ive never met such a miserable low self esteem pathetic excuse for a female.. ur a fucking loser"

"Have fun! U had the best guy u possibly ever could've had and u threw it away because ur a tapped bitch."

I should've just played it cool, but it was so hard for me to bite my tongue knowing she was hanging out with captain douche. He is one of those wannabe body builder jersey shore guys who gets fake tans, lives in the gym, and has a faux hawk.

I mean now that I think about it it makes sense. She was using me as a crutch and when I took that away from her she turned to her old crutch. So basically what it comes down to is that I really fucked up the situation. She blocked me on FB. I don't think we'll be talking any time soon if ever.

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Tryna "Wife" Them Bad Girls

Unfortunately .....i have to agree

Girls are stupid over the phone. They take what you say to seriously.

UPDATE

So even after the blow up from a week ago, she unblocked me on facebook and sent me a text while she was on vacation in San Francisco saying "Am I still dead to you? and do you still hate me?" I tried to ignore her, but then she called me from an alternate phone number and I got sucked into talking to her. We had some good conversations. She had been saying things like I've been picturing you here with me as well as sending me some barely clothed photos. She also asked for a picture of me because she missed my face. She can't view my facebook profile because I removed her as a friend like a month ago.

After having some good conversations while she was on vacation with lots of flirting, I offered to pick her up from the airport as she as still trying to figure out a ride situation. On the ride back from the airport she was giving me hugs, resting her head on my shoulder, and holding my hand the whole way home.

We get back to her house and we're talking some more, then we go up to her room and she gets in her bed because she wants to sleep, but then has me give her a hug, which led to her kissing my neck, and then us making out. But then she stops me and says she doesn't want to lead me on. LEAD me on?!! That's what she was doing the whole time!! And she keeps saying that she wants to take things one day at a time.

I don't get it, everything seems so good, but then stuff like that happens. She seems so conflicted inside her head and it's left me very confused. I can't figure if all that just happened was a good thing or a bad thing? I think I am going to keep my distance for a little bit and keep her wanting more. I think I should've been the one to stop the kissing, but I wasn't thinking like that because I wanted to escalate to the next level. But one thing I am not going to do is chase her. I am going to keep her making the moves, but now I need to be the one to put a stop to her moves. I don't want her to think that she can do whatever she wants whenever she wants on her terms. I want things to be on my terms.

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Tryna "Wife" Them Bad Girls

As my brother always says "Women are crazy. Find the least crazy one and marry her."

I think wolfwood was right in saying she may be a freak. It's not healthy for you to be with her. Give another girl a chance, and if you're still with this one, be more dominating and in control but don't overdo it like last time. Learn to calibrate better to the situation.

She is manipulating you ,be proud of yourself and dump that bitch

Yeah I really do want to just move on from her, but it has been difficult for me. I can't figure out why I have such strong feelings and emotions towards. I've been with so many girls who are more attractive. Why this one? For some reason she is in my head and will not go away. And I've been meeting lots of girls and getting numbers while we've been apart, but it doesn't change the way I feel. I'm still hung up on her.

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Tryna "Wife" Them Bad Girls