Your game looks good. Especially for just getting back into it. I've had a gf for the last few months, and just got finished polishing the rust off my online stuff, too.
One suggestion. The conversation was a little long, IMO. My preference is to number close quickly as possible.... Then text ASAP after getting the number, continuing the conversation via text.
Another thing I'll point out is your preference for PoF. You seem articulate in your writing. People like that do better on okcupid. It takes more time to write a good profile, and it needs to tuned up a notch from PoF. BUT a lot of the women on there are attractive and educated. So, they also appreciate articulate guys. Not just some dude flexing abs in his mom's bathroom mirror, sitting on a 30K motor bike his mom bought, etc.....
Give it try!
