I ned to stop being scared of the approach..ideas pls



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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 12:32 pm 
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I have the problem of being scared to approach women,not all the time but most. I ussually do well after the aproach but this is my biggest problem right now.I do well when I am drunk and loose all my fear of rejection and looking stupid but unfortunatly I cant be drunk all the time.I have thought about just walking up to random women where I live but its an army base so pretty much every women here is either still in high school or married.Any ideas greatly apreciated
Grande

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 12:40 pm 
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you just need to alter your mentality..from what i gather from your post you almost feel like you need to be drunk to not fear the approach which is a self-perpetuating prophecy..try to scope out the people who live nearby you, find someone who from first glance looks approachable, and then engage in casual conversation with that person (even if you are not intending to hook up with her)..then with that mentality in mind start approaching other women, and try your best to conceal your apprehension with a bit of light-hearted comedy without making yourself look like a pretender..it takes some practice but eventually it should come like second nature to you, and you will be able to approach girls non-inebriated successfully

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 1:32 pm 
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I will try this,it was an idea I had in my head already just wanted a second opinion.Only problem is I still don't have a clue what to say...
I will think of something thanks.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 7:46 pm 
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Great news!!

I just # closed a 5.She was an old co worker but I did it sober which for me is an amazing feat.I am ussually too scared to talk to women sober and here I did great.True I cheated a litle bit and used some1 I used to work with but we dont know each other that well anyways.I dont really plan to call her because last I remember she is a total bitch but who knows.I just wanted to break this fear I have and I of talking to women when im not in a pub and drunk.I passed my own 1st test!! Thats all I care about right now,is the aproach everything else Im pretty good at.I may go back to talk to her more because she looked at me like I was her superman saving her from the lame boring guys she was with.She begged me not to leave but I told her I would be back later.So I may just do that after I post this.Just wanted to share my good enough 1st success with you guys

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 8:24 pm 
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the way u interact with females is as simple as how u perceive yurself, u just need to work on yur confidence, wen u can approach women and say to yurself "so where should i take her for a date after i get those digits" then u will have no problem.


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 9:51 pm 
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Quote:
the way u interact with females is as simple as how u perceive yurself, u just need to work on yur confidence, wen u can approach women and say to yurself "so where should i take her for a date after i get those digits" then u will have no problem.


WOW that is an awsome way to put it.
That 5 is still here but with her BF.I stopped hanging out with her when he arrived.At 1st I felt like a chump for leaving but now an hour later. She wont stop looking at me while in her BF arms... I winked a time or 2 and keep waving her over to hang with me but she resist untill he goes to the bathroom or w/e.Then she darts over as soon as he isout of sight.Im proud of myself.She isnt that good looking or even interesting.
I think Im in good shape and could take this where I want to because it is only the opener hat has always plagued me,not the rest(easy part for me)

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 9:59 pm 
Great job on passing your own 1st test. That was a big step!


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 10:02 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
the way u interact with females is as simple as how u perceive yurself, u just need to work on yur confidence, wen u can approach women and say to yurself "so where should i take her for a date after i get those digits" then u will have no problem.


WOW that is an awsome way to put it.
That 5 is still here but with her BF.I stopped hanging out with her when he arrived.At 1st I felt like a chump for leaving but now an hour later. She wont stop looking at me while in her BF arms... I winked a time or 2 and keep waving her over to hang with me but she resist untill he goes to the bathroom or w/e.Then she darts over as soon as he isout of sight.Im proud of myself.She isnt that good looking or even interesting.
I think Im in good shape and could take this where I want to because it is only the opener hat has always plagued me,not the rest(easy part for me)
Well just be carefull there guy. If she has a BF and shes running off to you while he isnt looking there may be a chance that shes sucked you & her BF into her frame where she feels valued that 2 guys are wanting her attention. Personally Id be friends w/ the BF and totally ignore her. Plus given the chance game some girls infront of her.

As far as having the right frame & mentality when gaming I personally would think to myself:
"so where should SHE take ME for a date after she willingly gives those digits"

Congrats on opening & closing w/o alcoholic help.

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