I read this great article on CNN's website today that I thought I would share. It gives some great insight to kissing and the different male and female perspectives on it as well. To view the article in it's complete form go to
http://www.cnn.com/2007/LIVING/personal ... index.html
Here are some highlights to it.
"For men, kissing is more often used as a means to an end -- namely, to gain sexual access. Men also are more likely to literally kiss and make up, using kissing to attempt reconciliation.
Women on the other hand use kissing as a mate-assessment technique, Gallup notes. They subconsciously evaluate mating potential from the chemicals in their partner's saliva and breath, for instance.
Women also use kissing as a bonding gesture, as well as to monitor the status of the relationship. If her partner's kissing frequency or technique suddenly changes, that perhaps is a sign of his waning interest.
Other gender differences uncovered by Gallup's research:
• Men show a greater preference for tongue contact and open-mouth kisses.
• Men are more willing than women to have sex with someone without kissing, as well as to have sex with someone they are not attracted to or consider to be a bad kisser.
• Women place more importance on kissing throughout a relationship, whereas men place less importance on it as the relationship progresses."
Improve your kiss
If you've ever been told to kiss off after smooching someone beneath the holiday mistletoe, fear not. Like other skills, one's kissing technique can be improved upon. Michael Christian, author of "The Art of Kissing" (under the pen name William Cane), offers classes, and there's a myriad of how-to books and DVDs.
To improve your technique, Christian suggests switching up your repertoire with different types of kisses:
• Vacuum kiss, in which you suck the air out of your partner's mouth while kissing
• Neck kiss, in which you kiss up and down your partner's neck
• "Lip-o-suction," in which you kiss the upper lip while your partner kisses the lower lip, and then you reverse.
Bad kisses, on the other hand, are relatively easy to pinpoint. "Bad kisses trigger the gag reflex," Christian says. "Bad kisses are also static and repetitious. Varying the speed, intensity and style can help."
Spontaneity also can help you get out of a slump.
"The best kisses are always the ones that happen accidentally,"
I think there is something to be learned from this. First off, this article clearly outlines how much importance when place on kissing. Also the differences in how men and women view the act of kissing. As the article also states, "Bad kissers have little chance of getting to second base."
I'll further state that although important, don't work this up in your mind to be too big of a deal. It's not your end objective only the gateway to it. It's a critical step, but don't let your fears prevent you from doing it.
CHAT
