Ok,

To all those guys out there whose gfs used to be a bit big and have since lost weight....Did you find yourself looking less at and being tempted less by other girls after your gf lost weight and became more attractive?

My gf has beautiful face and love her very much but I don't find her body that attractive because she is carrying a bit too much fat for me personally and I find myself looking at more atractive girls and being tempted by them. I cant say anything to her about it any more because she gets really insecure if I mention it but she still wont lose the weight. Im thinking about going to the gym with her when she moves to my city.

So many things going on in your post JRS! I don't know where to begin.

First off, if you are a slim guy, she will almost certainly lose weight after moving to your town. Weight is highly correlated to who you spend time with.


I'm single now, but when my GFs have lost weight, it has lead me down a path of insecurity. The thought is that if she looks more attractive to other men, she might leave-- which leads to more thoughts of cheating than when she carried more weight.

Obviously not everyone is the same in this regard. If you feel very secure with her, it won't make a huge difference in all likelihood.

Hopefully when she moves to town, you'll feel more like your needs are met and less like you would want to go elsewhere.

I have also found that spending time with people makes you forget about their physical shortcomings. I went out with a GORGEOUS girl who had man-hands for 4 years. 8 months in, I didn't notice them anymore. It will likely be the same, if you grow to love the girl.

Best,

JPow

I agree with the above post. However, I want to build on it a little bit. If you believe that seeing her skinnier, more in shape, and most importantly healthier, then you should be aware of how you bring it up to her. If you go to the gym ask her if she wants to go. If you don't go to the gym then tell ask her about what she thinks about going together. You could even ask her if she wants to walk around the block with you and your dog if you have one. There should be no more hinting than that. In fact, look at it as you inviting her to do something that you want to do. That way you don't come across as being a douchebag, you get to spend time with her, and you get to enjoy seeing her healthier. See how she reacts. Most likely if the relationship is going well then she will want to go no problem. But, if she is the lazy, couch potato, type then I would re-evaluate a little more than her weight because her weight wouldn't be the only problem, it would be her lifestyle. However, if she's the outgoing type and like going out and stuff then you have no problems.

Don't you have a post alreaday 28 replies long saying how you've already broke up with your girlfriend cuz she's fat.

So what your telling everyone here who wasted their time giving you props on your last post is that you're still with her and still crying about how she needs to lose weight... very lame man.

It's time to quit asking for advice to your obvious questions get out and go do something about it if your unhappy.

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Well we split up but got back together yesterday. We decided to work things out because we love each other so much, so now I'm actually wondering if I'm likely to feel happier in the relationship if she loses weight because I still look at other more attractive girls and want to look at my gf that way instead. I didn't address this on my other thread. Its not an obvious question to me because I honestly dont know if her losing weight is likely to make me stop looking at and wanting (physically not emotionally) other girls or not. Thats why I want to hear other peoples experiences regarding this.

Also, how do you suppose I go out and do something about it? Like I said I can't tell her to lose weight, and right now we only see each other every couple of weeks so we can't go to the gym together but that should change in the future.

Kudos Reo, I didn't even connect the dots and I usually do. Umm yeah JRS I still stick to what I said above, but now that I realize that you have posted on this subject before I have to ask what the hell is going on? I thought you wanted out? People, myself included defended your position on going after what you want and then you go right back to it. Honestly I wonder if us giving you advice this time will be taken seriously by you.

I don't really see the big deal. I changed my mind. I obviously wasnt sure about my decision, if I was then I wouldn't have posted my previous thread. I took all your advice on board and thought about it but that doesn't mean I couldn't change my mind about what I had done. A week of splitting up with your gf makes you think a lot and makes you realise what they mean to you. You guys defended my decision to split up with her and I was grateful to hear that but over the past week I realised that even though it was a reasonable reason to split up with her, I now realise that I want to give things another go.

Forgive me for being annoying but when I posted the other thread I had no idea I would change my mind. Your advice was not wasted anyway, it helped clarify what I thought and made me feel less guilty for splitting up with her and it may also be helpful for others in my situation.

As I said, the reason for this post is different from the last and while it may be annoying to you that the last thread no longer concerns me, the question that I asked in this post is still valid and fires concern me and I would be grateful for your advice.