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| strido | PostPosted: Wed Nov 02, 2011 8:29 pm | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Mon Oct 31, 2011 11:01 pm Posts: 29 Location: Los Angeles | | Met the girl online. Agreed to meet up. Mutual cancel 2 weekends ago. This past week she didn't respond for a few days, but finally we reconnected on phone Friday. She initiated that we should meet up on Tuesday night. We both had crazy weekends (my car died/ she had 2 car accidents in 3 days) I saw the status update about accident IM'd her how she was doing, brief small talk, no mention by either of us about date, but she asked if she could call me back the next night. No date and no phone call.
How should I proceed from this point?? I feel like I've been pretty AFC here. Any links to dealing w/ flakes in general would be helpful too as I feel this is a BIG sticking point for me. _________________ I finally chose the red pill
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| detox75 | PostPosted: Thu Nov 03, 2011 12:29 am | |
| Offline | | PUA Forum Leader |  | Joined: Sat Oct 08, 2011 4:56 pm Posts: 1904 Location: Portland, OR | | If you let a girl flake on you it lowers your value in their eyes, whether she had a legit reason for flaking or not. Needless to say ive adopted a fairly simple policy for flakes.
1. If they flake and send some text saying they flaked, and they are sorry (they always send this text) I do not respond for a couple of days and I in no way excuse their behavior. I assume all flaking is fake. I let them know I dont normally tolerate this behavior.
2. I will plan another date with them but its on my terms; likely dinner at my house, so I make it a high pressure sexual situation for them to make up and counteract the DLV of flaking. They very well may not agree to my new date terms, but going on a normal date after you tolerated a flake is already walking into a tainted low value situation.
Now in your specific case it sounded like you were too accommodating after her mishaps. She probably thinks your too easy/desperate/lack of options now and isn't interested any more. Again flaking must be punished, laughed off, or ignored not empathized with or excused. Nice guys finish last
oh and finally the "can I call/text you tomorrow" thing. Whenever a girl postpones and delays a easily accomplished task that she would do if she interested then shes not interested. Never believe this bullshit. The line she gave you is super common and I don't know of one incident where an interested girl has ever used it sincerely.
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| strido | PostPosted: Thu Nov 03, 2011 4:19 am | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Mon Oct 31, 2011 11:01 pm Posts: 29 Location: Los Angeles | | awesome! thanks man. _________________ I finally chose the red pill
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| maxpower82 | PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2012 1:33 pm | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Mon Aug 22, 2011 1:59 pm Posts: 6 Location: Southampton, United-Kingdom | | I got the girl, got her into bed on the second date... she was calling and texting non-stop... we saw each other 2 or 3 times a week for 3 weeks then we went on a weekend away together. Amazing romantic weekend, lots of fun but then after the weekend together, she started to pull away. her 25 messages per day turned to 2 and no phone call. 3 days into it, she told me that she had just been very busy at work and couldnt see me until next week (bullshit excuses since i know she's going out w her friends on friday, so clearly if she wanted she could make time one evening this weekend, saturday or even sunday)
I happen to really like this girl and I tried to avoid "gaming" other girls at the same time for the past 3 weeks that i have been hooking up with her...so I ve cut myself a bit from my other options.
What do I do? how do i reel her back in? Any text message example i can use to get her to stop whatever she's doing to meet up. I know if i see her, she'll be mine again guaranteed, she couldnt keep her hands off me.
We always talk about flaking in the context of a girl you haven't gotten yet, but what happens when you got the girl, she was all over you and now she's taking steps backwards... was it too much too soon? is she a bit scared? should i reassure her or should i move back myself and get back on the case of my outside options?!?
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| detox75 | PostPosted: Sat Feb 04, 2012 5:02 am | |
| Offline | | PUA Forum Leader |  | Joined: Sat Oct 08, 2011 4:56 pm Posts: 1904 Location: Portland, OR | | raising attraction through texts is a fools errand, especially so after you have had numerous contacts. Texting isn't the answer to anything in your situation.
I would freeze her out and re-engage her. However she likely just doesn't like you that much for some reason or she has something else going on. I would be interested in knowing which, but dont expect an honest answer. Unfortunately I dont think you have a lot of great options here. I agree with you that her being "busy" is bullshit.
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