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Why put yourself in a context where people will put there negative feelings and biases aside? It’s easy to feel an affinity with someone you just met when you are the novelty or share stereotypical beliefs and values from your home country. You wouldn’t speak to each other back at home and fight the public scrutiny of the social classes for someone you care about? That is if it is real. It’s not easy is it? You have to hide in another world, the shame and guilt would be too much to handle, I know.
Are you trying to find yourself here in the1st world without a drive or are you just filling the void that you call living? It’s warm here isn’t it, but in the back of your mind you do know it’s cold outside you must of heard from someone that knew someone that knew someone. You can pray on the vulnerable here, but is it real? I’m not really fussed about what brand of milk I buy it’s a homogenised product. It wears its heart on its sleeve what I see is what I get, what I drink is what I sweat and what I piss, well that is my business. If you were back home who would you be? The average, another number? What separates you from what’s “normal”? I don’t think you understand WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU? Some it up in one word instead of bragging about your “gift” or simply show me the evidence without bias.
Do you speak another language? No. Do you speak my language? We are speaking the same language? No we are not! You can drink and eat the food then, but you can’t speak at the party. You’re a big fish in a small pond because you have an accent? Yeah the thing I remember most about her was her.. um.. accent. Superficiality, you didn’t notice it did you. You thought it was deep and intense for a second there. I thought it was weak and shallow from the get go. Are you trying to humour me? WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?
Show me something weak and I’m not going to respond. I’m slow to warm up to, I know. I don’t brag about myself, I know. I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve, I know. It’s frustrating? I don’t know. I don’t know what you’re thinking. Like I said I don’t know who you are, but we are just getting to know each other. Maybe we should just have fun? We can have a lot of fun in my world. This world is a cold place during the lows, but when the highs come you will feel euphoria like you’re on ecstasy. Remember don’t lose control when it feels good, we are being judged out here and the environment is real it can kill us anytime. Just enjoy it while it lasts. Don’t try to force it. The biggest high is yet to come. The question is will it be or is it the last?
find a doctor, a Rehab joint or a Councillor. if it helps see all three. Cocaine is a hell of a drug. just sayin
CHAT