I have low libido.. GF is getting a bit annoyed/upset...



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PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2012 12:14 pm 
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Hey guys..

Me and my girl have been going out for 2 years and 3 months. Over the last 8 months or so my sex drive (libido) has been low. By low I mean I only 'truly' want to have sex around once a week. I have googled it but couldn't find any consistent information. I'm 19, fit and healthy. I am at the same University as my girl but she is in the year below.

One thing I should point out: During periods of stress (exams) I can never get an erection. I went to the doctors and had some tests but my hormone levels are fine so apparently there is nothing 'physically' wrong with me.

Any dudes have some advice. It's hurting my girl and I'm unsure what to do? Is wanting to have sex once a week normal when i'm 19?

Regards
Hero


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2012 1:03 pm 
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I'd say it has nothing to do with your actual libido and has more to do with attraction and all that chemistry in your brain. Do you find yourself attracted to other girls?
This always happened to me in LTRs, especially if the girl was always up for sex, also usually after 2 or 3 years of being together. I just didn't want it more than every once in a while. Not even once a week, after 4 years or so, more like once a month. Even though the sex was good, once it happened I did enjoy a lot, but the wish wasn't there. But I did get really horny and wanting to have sex with other people though. Never cheated, but did in my mind. I see this happening with many male friends too, when we have honest conversations. I realized then that the reason behind my low libido was dissatisfaction with the relationship itself. There was like this mental block I couldn't pinpoint. But I remember on occasions when I had some deep conversations with my gf and some of the things that were unconsciously bothering me were resolved, I instantly felt attraction for her and wanted to have sex. Maybe try looking for the reasons in other areas of your relationship. Feeling pressured to want sex more isn't gonna help either.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2012 2:42 pm 
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Or Perhaps you are having some sort of pression.

Stress can be the issue here.

But are you still atracted to your g/f?

2 years is a long time.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2012 5:23 pm 
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I suggest you get your shit sorted out. If you don't fuck your woman, somebody else will.


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2012 5:27 pm 
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Quote:
I'd say it has nothing to do with your actual libido and has more to do with attraction and all that chemistry in your brain. Do you find yourself attracted to other girls?
This always happened to me in LTRs, especially if the girl was always up for sex, also usually after 2 or 3 years of being together. I just didn't want it more than every once in a while. Not even once a week, after 4 years or so, more like once a month. Even though the sex was good, once it happened I did enjoy a lot, but the wish wasn't there. But I did get really horny and wanting to have sex with other people though. Never cheated, but did in my mind. I see this happening with many male friends too, when we have honest conversations. I realized then that the reason behind my low libido was dissatisfaction with the relationship itself. There was like this mental block I couldn't pinpoint. But I remember on occasions when I had some deep conversations with my gf and some of the things that were unconsciously bothering me were resolved, I instantly felt attraction for her and wanted to have sex. Maybe try looking for the reasons in other areas of your relationship. Feeling pressured to want sex more isn't gonna help either.
Thanks again. Appreciate a girls point of view. I agree that when I do want it I get totally up for it. But this only happens once a week or so as I said.

With regards to satisfaction. 95% of the time I feel completely satisfied but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be single. Im in Uni and im only 19 so there is a tiny part of me that would like to be more adventurous. But she is amazing and i'm almost scared that I could never meet anyone like her again. She is a gem to me. It would kill her if I broke up. What you think? really I thank you


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2012 6:24 pm 
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Dating for 2 yrs sounds like you've been dating since highschool. College is a time to explore new women and figure out what types you like. But if you really like this girl then that's fine too.

If you're having problem getting it up why not have her give you a bj first then put the condom on.
Maybe its time to look into a getting a hotter girlfriend. But in the end you're going to have to get it together she's only going to put up with it for so long.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2012 9:55 pm 
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Quote:
Thanks again. Appreciate a girls point of view. I agree that when I do want it I get totally up for it. But this only happens once a week or so as I said.

With regards to satisfaction. 95% of the time I feel completely satisfied but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be single. Im in Uni and im only 19 so there is a tiny part of me that would like to be more adventurous. But she is amazing and i'm almost scared that I could never meet anyone like her again. She is a gem to me. It would kill her if I broke up. What you think? really I thank you
Don't break up if you love this girl, there's no point in that. I do assure you, you will meet another girl like that, if you do break up however. It won't be the end of the world. Maybe just try to relax and realize that whatever happens was meant to be.
About the sex thing, does she like receiving oral? If so, you can just orally please her without wanting anything in return. If you do get horny during it, and fuck her as well, it's a bonus. What about your fantasies? Are they being fulfilled? Maybe you just need to spice it up a bit, Idk.
In any case, assure her your low libido has nothing to do with her, if it really doesn't, blame it on the stress and let things flow in their natural course. If you are ready to take care of her sexual needs, despite not feeling the need yourself, this should relieve the situation and you should feel less pressure. Just make sure she knows it's not her fault (if it isn't).

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 22, 2012 10:42 pm 
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If you 19 and only wanting it once a week I wouldn't consider that normal. When I was that age I was hitting it a few times a week. Maybe 4-5 a week.

Have her watch porn with you. Role play. Call her a different name. Do it in other areas other than your bedroom. (Dressing rooms, swimming pools, in the bathroom of a bar, car or her parents house, have her meet you during your class in a bathroom for a quickie). Just something to break the monogamous schedule that your on. Get some sex toys. Just make it exciting.

You think she wants it bad now.. wait till she gets in her late 20's and early 30's. Hold on for a ride.


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 7:11 am 
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Well Hero99, i think this is problem of erectile dysfunction. First try to dig out the cause of it.javascript:emoticon(':D')


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 9:33 am 
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The 5 G's

-Ginkgo Biloba 120-240 mg a day.
-Green Tea 250-600 mg a day. Can be the capsules or the tea itself.
-Ginger Caps 500-1000 mg a day.
-Oderized Garlic 5-10 mg a day (equal to 500mg of garlic clove). 2x a day
-Gibseng. Preferably American Ginseng. 100-200 mg a day.

Start with the lowest dosage values and cycle on 2 weeks on 1 week off. After 3 months increase dosage and cycle periods if needed.

Wil cost about a hundred bucks for a 2-3 month supply.

Thank me later


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 5:15 pm 
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Go to your doc, get blood work done to see were your test levels are at, are you tired often? hows your muscle tone? hows your mood?


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2012 11:15 pm 
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1.Take zinc 100mg a day for maybe 5-7days. Makes you horny as all hell, at least it did for me!
2.Do some heavy lifting if you have a gym near you, helps raise test levels a bit, shit like that.
3.Drink a lot of water, 50+oz a day, helps with every bodily function including stress.
4.Do you drink a lot of caffeine? Take NSAIDs alot (ibuprofen, tylenol, etc) either of these things can make it pretty damn hard to get it up if you use them for prolonged periods.
5.Heavy/ moderate drinking or moderate/heavy marijuana use CAN lower libido a lot, doesn't happen to everybody, but it sure can. Do you party a lot? If so maybe cut down.
6.Blood tests, as previously suggested.
7.Eat a lot of bananas, chocolate, and honey. All of these can help raise libido!
8.Experiment with different sex positions, rougher/lighter, etc. You get my drift.
9. If you find this manifesting itself more and more as a psychological issue viagra works wonders! I took it twice to get over my psychological ED with current girlfriend and things have been perfect since.
10. Have sex immediately when you wake up when you have "morning wood", it'll stay up 95% of the time.
11. Take skullcap 300-900mg daily for 2-4 weeks. Can buy it as a supplement, helps reduce anxiety but gotta stick with it.
12. Bring it up with your girlfriend if you haven't already. It might just be that your hormone levels have dropped, sometimes you body changes, and with some time it could go right back to normal!
13. Don't masturbate at all. Will help as well.
Hopefully something helps best of luck to ya man!

14.Oh and do you smoke cigarettes? I quit smoking and after a week my erections were so much fucking better its ridiculous. Smoking can be a boner killer for some people, not all but some.


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