Man there were so much information given to you that had you used it (like freezing out), you might of had a chance with her, but for now it's way too late; and like someone else had suggested earlier, even if you get back together it's not going to work out simply because you have not grown up, mentally, although you think you have but your actions says other wise.

like others, and like yourself, i had a bad break up as well; ironically it started to end around March lol, and it ended officially mid june. it was a 5+ year LTR and bro, it tore me apart when it ended. just like you i wanted to get back with her and for about a week only, after the break up i tried to do everything i could to do so, shit let's face it, it was a 5 year old relationship. a week went by, i got nothing but cold responses and after every "response" i felt a sense of shame and hatred towards me because i knew what i was lowering myself and my standards.

the next week i decided that No contact it is, this started in july, and i've maintained no contact until this day; i've deleted her emails, FB, changed phone #s etc, extreme no contact bro. and TRUST ME, if you do the same you'll come to the same understand we all did "she's not worth my time or energy"

try no contact and hopefully you'll start using some logic and realize that she's not Plan A bro. by acting the way you acted u gave her too much power....

My actions say otherwise? In what way? I didn't come across as needy, or as not in control.
Normally I would text her, try to keep her entertained, try to get her to like me.
Now when I run into her, it's just an ex that I can have a little fun with, just some bullshit texting.

Oh, and Mantis-, I've come to a emperical conclusion that when you do not make eye contact more than a second, you gain higher value. You don't care how she looks today.
It's just like having a girlfriend. I then didn't look at ANY girl, and they would ALL look at me like I'm some sort of deer. Ofcourse, sometimes when you make eye contact and the girl would just stare back for hours, it gives me a legitimate in-head boner. But this RARELY happens, most of the times they would look down and feel intimidated. Approaching becomes easier, because you're not putting pressure on them, and believe me, eye contact can have lots of different effects.
(I, for example, can be considered as the more 'dangerous' person in my country, while I'm the nicest and smartest guy around here)

...But I really, and believe me, when you get fucked the way I did, and I'm not talking about any pussy, really now know what went wrong. And maybe I shouldn't get back with her, like what R.C. said: Damn it, always when I read about that pathetic situation, it just demolishes me.
Really, you guys should actually all come over to her and have her stepdad tell you to go away, and her laughing behind the windows. Damn it's still a wave of shame.

Come to think of that, the most important part:

Should I communicate in any way with this girl? When I run into her, and yes I will sometimes, should I just talk to her? Or make it clear that what she did the other time was crossing the line? And have her sincerely apologize for that moment, although it is a girl who thinks with her emotions.

Or just act like I didn't even care and act aloof all the time, keeping in mind that she is just evil and she does not earn me?
(so give short answers and don't ask questions. (although a bit socially unstable...))

Thnx btw

Care to explain this?
I would think since the pressure is on you now, its actually harder to approach?
The pressure is on her, all you do is walk up and talk, she has the decision on what to do (I find this idea entertaining haha).

I think if you've had a fight with a girl you want to game, you should ignore her.
She will eventually come up to you and excuse, or ignore you. If she ignores you shes not worth the time.

If you feel like talking to her like you talk to me (yes, me ) - just a normal convo witha absolutely no feelings involved or any reminders of the past - yea , it's ok to talk to her.Otherwise , don't.

Depending on your relationship 1 thing is certain always. It's either YOUR or HER loss.
You could've been the best person in the world with her and she was just to blind to realize that. It's her loss . If it's the other way around , it's your loss.

Look , my best friend went through a tough break-up with his girl about 3 month ago (he finally had enough of her sh!t) and she was the type of girl to cross the lines I was talking about , she was doing it all the time and in return he loved her even more. He was the ultimate absolute best she could ever want and she never realized it.Well, about 2-3 weeks ago she realized what she lost. She literally BEGGED him to take her back for hours on end finally taking responsability for the shit she used to do and recognizeing how he was the best thing that she ever came across in her life.
The point of this story is that that would've never happened if he texted her or gave her any more atention that he would normaly give any other stranger.


You broke up , that's it. She's just like the next girl to which you may or may not talk , depending on how you feel. She shouldn't have any 'priority' over other people in your life anymore.

Well, now that I've texted her some funny shit, it would be awkard to act distant when I run into her. I will have to have a conversation with her, but more on that below. (girls=girls)

And you're right, it can be one person's loss. But the connection you make with someone depends on both personalities.
I actually KNOW it's HER loss, just by comparing our status in society, if I can state it that way. I guess she knows this, but my AFCness back then was too overwhelming, so she, like every other girl, has had to stop it.

That's my biggest problem/dilemma: Girls are girls. If a girl notices the AFC behaviour, she would do the same as any other girl, that is to end the relation. That's why I can't really blame her for, although it was quite hard, 'breaking' my heart.
It's like I'm blaming her for being a girl.
In my country, my 'kind' of people always try to get every girl, and whistle at every girl, so that's why when I hit on a girl, i'm more like a stereotype, and she doesn't feel any special. That's why going direct here tends to fail. (for me at least)

Let me put it this way: When you're not trying to get eye contact with every (hot) girl, your value goes up. You won't give her attention, because you don't 'need' women. So when you want to open her, she will think: Why isn't this guy only a bit intrigued by my beauty? It could be that he already has a beautiful girlfriend, or he's always surrounded by hot girls, etc. Ofcourse this only applies to indirect openers, and then depending on her personality, you make a decision if you want her or not. So indirect qualifying will make her want to get your attention. (if you got any value)

Omg

I was sitting in the bus again, saw her getting on the bus, not looking at anyone and just sat down.
I thought about texting her something like: ¨haha socially retarded again?¨, but then she would come and talk to me and didnt feel like talking to her, the whole ride, so I thought never mind.

Then at the last stop, I stood up, as almost everyone. She was 8 meters away from me and turned around, having a split second eye contact with me, and then she and ofcourse I went off the bus...

When I got out I turned around one more time to see if she wanted to greet or say something to me, but she didnt, just like I did the last time.

So, life is hard, due to this whole PUA it feels like I'm overthinking everything, but at the same time thinking about the consequences if I didn't overthink...

You just don't get it...

+2 haha.

Why ask advice when ur not gonna take it nyway?
+ its kinda hypocrit texting that lol, i mean u could walk up to her xD

OKAY GUYS!

It has been over a year since I talked to The Horrible Ex-Girlfriend.

Completely moved on and worked on inner game and looks and feel like another, better person.
Probably mostly because of all your support. So ofcourse: thanks guys.

A really, really weird, kind of like Law of Attraction-type of thing happened:

A couple of days ago, on a lonely night, I thought about her for a few seconds: "She was a really nice sympathic girl, and could get along. I don't want her as my GF again, maybe as a fuckbuddy, but I really want to get more beautiful girlfriends. So I thought, maybe we could just be friends of ofcourse FB's.

So a day later, as I was living my life, wanting to keep meeting other girls, suddenly my phone rings: "You have a new message.".
Well, I can tell you it wasn't Santa. She randomly texted me about hearing a song that I(/we) liked. So I negged her, sent a text back with a whole other subject. She then texts back about how I am, so I texted her that I'm doing alright, but didn't sent a text back, which I think was kind of sad/mean. So 20 min later I texted her that I was busy, and how she was with a neg. She texted back and I negged her again, whereafter she sends a complying text. I remember, let her earn your attention so I just left it like that...

I know that a year ago I had a really bad attitude/behaviour and it was too clingy/needy, so I pushed her away. Now I want her to chase me, but I don't want a relationship. I just like the girl to talk to, but I don't want her as a actual girlfriend, just maybe hang out sometimes and make her my FB. I think she secretly wants that too.

Now I'm thinking, when she suddenly texts you, she wants something. And I'm afraid that she's going to diss me again if I randomly ask her to join me for squash or whatever. But what else does she wants from me right now? Should I randomly text her something that reminds me of her or just leave it like this, letting her initiate again?

Whizz.