This is VERY difficult to do. Changing oneself AT ITS CORE is something that requires one to unlearn/challenge ones believes and relearn everything from scratch to develop the right mindset that would position oneself for success - be it women, having good friends or the way you approach your career and business.

I know its very difficult because I had to do this at one point in my life - I was may 12yrs old, 15 or may be 19 yrs old - I dont remember but I was very young. A good sportsman, great academically, was a leader of my peer group, in all as I remember a well rounded kid. But, thought I was doing great and that everyone liked me a lot since I didnt have people confronting me and just following me.

However, one day I over heard my 'friends' talking about me in my absence. I dont remember exactly what they were saying but it was unpleasant at the time. The people who followed what I said did that more so out of their lack of willingness to fight back. At home, my dad was constantly cautioning me of my 'Bold' behavior. My teachers were would pass comments that I thought no end of myself.

Quite Honestly, I didnt know what I was doing wrong. Why would everyone be hostile towards me. After all I was good at everything and all that I wanted like any other kid was to be appreciated and liked. After all,being a Good sportsmen + good grades + being surrounded by a lot of people = You are the best and we like you ! - That was my defination - my world

Anyways, I spent sometime trying to understand what I was doing wrong. Mellowed the way I put myself across, became more considerate towards other people, stopped saying anything that would be condescending. Learned to control my mind and any reaction that would show temper. Let others lead sometimes. There are a more things that I did along the way for may be 6 months to a year.

I realized that I was leading in a lot of other things and need not be the leader of my peer group ALL THE TIME.

This helped me get the results I wanted - No longer the guy talked ill about, No longer the guy who was targeted by teachers, didn't have to listen to any hurtful things from my father.

It wasnt easy for me to alter the way I reacted or behaved but it required some thought, modeling my own behavior on people I knew were liked. The change was good but difficult.


This holds true for even PUA - If you are not getting results, try to see what is going wrong, model your behavior at first after someone you'd like to be. Throw away all the believes that you have on what is possible/impossible with women. And walk into this space with an OPEN MIND willing to learn. STOP ALL BAD HABITS just when you are about to commit them - be aware of your surroundings and alter your behavior based on it.