Has anyone here with severe anxiety (approach, social or otherwise) tried seeing a psychologist/psychiatrist. Were you able to over come your anxiety issues without medication?

I had really REALLY bad anxiety. To the point where I thought I was having a heart attack. Even went to the hospital for it.

Then I met a really awesome natural. I just talked about it with him, discussions were not always on women but life in general. Never had anxiety since then, besides the usual mild aa.
And no medication. Pm if you want and ill tell you some more of your interested.

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I'm walking on sunshine! ;D

Luffy why not just post some of that advice here?

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Ha, because I was walking and on my way somewhere.

Well for one, I eventually realized what I was feeling was completely mental and self induced. I was told to replace the negative thoughts and feelings with positive ones.
To breathe nice and slowly. And just continue to tell myself that I feel great, I feel great, I feel great (not kidding it really works). The guy sort of figured out who and how I was, amazing skill.

Then I came across another post talking about a book called The Secret. Literally changed my attitude towards everything completely. I really do feel that I draw in whatever I feel. And you may call it stupid or whatever but it works for me. I have proof that its worked for me many times, but that would take to long to talk about.

I highly recommend reading it and I'm sure many others here would agree with me.

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I'm walking on sunshine! ;D

Thanks Luffy- I don't feel anxiety all the time, mostly when it comes to interacting with other people. I think in the back of my head there is always a voice that is spouting the opinion that I couldn't possibly be good enough for whatever person (really doesn't matter who that person is). Even when I'm dating someone I have wait for them to give me the green light for things like initiating sex. As you can imagine, this way of thinking is hindering PUA (and life, for that matter). I think I will absolutely need some sort of help to progress.

I had major AA. I was not able to approach girls. When I did, I would bail in a minutes or so even if is going great.

Part of it was being in my head too much. Get out your head, and just be in the moment. And also, you have to get to a point where you have fun talking to women. Get these 2 things down, your gonna be like me when your out. Kid in a candy store. Every time I see a cute girl, instead of fearing, I get excited and open.

If your getting negative self messages like not good enough then your not being present because in the absence of presence is the old negative message of you.
try listening and interacting based on her reactions in the moment not what outcome you want or dont want beforehand drop all outcomes or ego and humble yourself enough to accept your weakness over the situation, then your interactions will be more congruent and not some schtick or persona, if you give schtick girl will sometimes give you her bitch schtick.


try letting your minds thoughts just drift from thought to thought starving the AA of any attention or thought and it subsides and behave like the non anxious you regardless of how you feel..
watch some comedy before you go out or focus on breathing properly ..
End of the day you fear women that are all gonna die,she might look good but she sees her face age too.
youll have to learn by exposure for the most part so stop looking for answers after this thread and get some exposure before deciding to look for more info..
just a few tips..good luck with it bro...

Edit: as far as therapy for AA it dosent work in my experience because your reinforcing that the meaningless anxious sensations has value it dosent,your life is not in danger, the more you talk about it the worse it gets..ignore it..Divert Distract=reset.

I can assure 100% that you don't need need medication. Just take your time, start by talking to a shop assistant or something like that and just start by asking her
" How is your day going? " There is no way in hell they are going to be rude.
Try to do that evey day, when you feel a little bit more confident you can start by stopping girls in the street and ask them for an address. Like I said just take your time, do it 10 times every day and you will see the results.

I did with a friend of mine and after only one month doing it he was able to stop girls in the streets and give them compliments.

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Winners have simply formed the habit of doing things losers do not like to do 18/03/12

[quote="FCgame"]I can assure 100% that you don't need need medication. Just take your time, start by talking to a shop assistant or something like that and just start by asking her
" How is your day going? " There is no way in hell they are going to be rude.
Try to do that evey day, when you feel a little bit more confident you can start by stopping girls in the street and ask them for an address. Like I said just take your time, do it 10 times every day and you will see the results.

I did with a friend of mine and after only one month doing it he was able to stop girls in the streets and give them compliments.[/quote]

Well, I have severe AA and I am trying to get rid of it for a long long time. All these things like NLP, tapes and all the other stuff people suggest are not helpful. At this moment I realize that the advice you just gave is the only advice that can really cure anyone from severe AA.

How do I know it ? Well, a year ago I had a week off. Duing that week I decided to approach for 3 days in a row. The first day I couldn't approach. But I allowed my wing to open some woman in a shop and make her think I am gay and looking for earrings. The next day, I wanted to approach but I couldn't. But then my wing advised me to just approach someone, not necessarily a woman. I started opening and old couple ... this gave me some momentum and at the end of the day I had approached 6 times. My last set was a 2-set with 1 really cute girl in it. The day after I went to a city I didn't know. When I came out of the train station I opened 3 people (2 men and 1 woman) and asked them where the center was. I met my wing in the centre and we continued approaching. It still costed me to approach. But as time passed by, approaching went easier. At the end of the day I opened 10 times. After my 9th approach I managed to open a 2-set drinking at a table. One of the 2 girls was really behaving like a pain in the ass, but I didn't really care. I started ignoring her and could easily keep my frame and continued the conversation with the friend. At that particular moment I felt a confidence like I have never felt before in my life.

But then I started working again and stopped approaching. Those 3 days thought me a lof things about AA:

- If you are scared to approach women ... start approaching men asking them simple directions. After a few times this will give you momentum which reduces the fear of approaching a woman.

- If you keep approaching consistent day after day you will feel your confidence raising every day.

- During the same day ... the more people you approach, the more confident you get.

- If you approach enough people during the same day, you will suddenly experience a spike of confidence and get a little bit of a "I don't care state of mind.".

- If you stop practicing, your confidence will go away and you will get AA again.

If I overlook these points and my past experiences with approaching, I should actually be really ashamed of myself for still having AA. With this knowledge I should have beaten AA a long time ago. I realize that my lazyness is the reason for still having AA. OK, at this moment I am at my work. I know that after work I should go to the city center and at least approach 3 people (preferably 3 women). And I do feel tired because I am almost 8 hours working. This feeling of tiredness is actually holding me back now. I should find a way to get over this lazy feeling such that I will go to the city center after work.

FCgame is sooooo right. Consistency is key. And it doesn't matter if you approach 1 or 100 girls. It all depends on the amount of fear you have. You should not try to open 20 women direct if your fear is really big. Your goal should be to consistently expand your comfort zone a little bit. Now, I just got to do this. AA is my own bloody mistake.

AMEN BROTHER!!! Fuck me ! That's a good response!

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Winners have simply formed the habit of doing things losers do not like to do 18/03/12

According to Mystery, fear of approach goes back to cavemen times.

If u approached a woman back then, and she didnt like u for some reason, u would either get beat up by the other cavemen, or u would be ridiculed by the woman herself to the other cavewomen. She would tell them how lame u were, and then
u wouldnt be able to approach anybody ever again cause u were cut off.

I guess that's true, we fear w woman will run and tell other people that we asked them out and it will get around to others that we failed.

To be honest, since day one, I never feared approaching. I do fear it somewhat in a big crowd, like on a dance floor or a crowded club.

I think it's not even the fear of the woman as much as it is being embarrased in front of others.

But what little fear i had, i was able to get passed that easily enough. not sure it makes a difference, if the woman wants u she wants u, if she dont, well

But, I would try approaching at safer levels first. How hard can it be to walk up to a girl in a supermarket and say "hi" Sure might walk away fast, but most will smile back.

if u dont know the word desensitation, look it up. its the gradual ability to tolerate something that was not tolerated before. Prostitutes, start off feeling really scared and really low in the beginning, but over time it becomes like sneezing or farting, no problems at all.

So if u start small, saying hi to women in safe places, u can build up over time, and eventually get over the fear.

Good Luck

[quote="40 year old virgins broth"]According to Mystery, fear of approach goes back to cavemen times.
[/quote]
That is Mystery's version of the world. But this is not scientifically proven. According to me this is complete bullshit. If this would be hardwired people wouldn't be capable of overcoming the fear. I have met extremely shy people afraid of talking to people in general that today have almost no fear to escalate hard on really hot women. As a kid I wasn't afraid to talk to girls. On the contrary, I only used to hang out with girls. I talked to them with no fear at all. So how can the fear by hardwired ?

Fear is the result of your life story. If you get bitten by a dog as a kid, you will probably fear dogs if you grow up. If you don't get bitten by a dog as a kid, you will probably not be scared of dogs.

Well I dont view Mystery as a scientist, although he thinks he is. But I think he's lukewarm there.

Im gonna have to disagree with u though, i think humans have innate fears that we are born with.

Some are worse than others, but just about everybody shits their pants while standing on the ledge of a skyscraper building. Instincts tell us we are dead if we fall.

fear of the unknown is pretty primative too.

but u CAN train yourself to not fear it, we are capable of amazing things we can adapt to almost anything, like low oxygen or low food supply, so adapting to fear of approach should be doable too.

[quote="40 year old virgins broth"]
Well I dont view Mystery as a scientist, although he thinks he is. But I think he's lukewarm there.

Im gonna have to disagree with u though, i think humans have innate fears that we are born with.

Some are worse than others, but just about everybody shits their pants while standing on the ledge of a skyscraper building. Instincts tell us we are dead if we fall.

fear of the unknown is pretty primative too.

but u CAN train yourself to not fear it, we are capable of amazing things we can adapt to almost anything, like low oxygen or low food supply, so adapting to fear of approach should be doable too.[/quote]

Yep, and you are saying exactly the same as I do and telling Mystery is wrong. Mystery says that AA is a fear from cavemen days. If a woman rejects you, no other woman would ever want you. It is biologically hardwired. That is bullshit.

Fear of women is not hardwired. It becomes hardwired if you don't get exposed enough to them or if you have many bad experiences with women during childhood. AA is partly fear of the unknown ... but this is not the only reason. I know people that read about game, went infield, had almost no AA, approached 1000 women, had 0 succes ... and guess what ? Now, suddenly they have AA.

As a kid I didn't fear women. Why ? Because they had no special value to me. I saw women and men as equal because I wasn't attracted to them. I started to get this fear once I felt attraction for women. If you feel attracted to a girl, you want something from her ... if you don't get it, you are going to think there is something wrong with you. And that gives you a bad feeling. This is what triggers AA. The day I lose my penis I will not fear talking to women anymore.

well we are hardwired to hunt animals, but somwehre along the line somebody decided it was inhumane to kill animals, so many stopped.

but back in caveman times any animal that came by was lunch.

it's nature verses nuture.

I dont believe all cases of AA result from bad experiences, there isnt one human who wasnt scared to approach somewhere along the line.

Nobody who never feared dying

Nobody who never had stage fright, or got nervous.

Do all these things result from bad experiences or are they innate, normal