I was with my ex for 2 years, and we had a great connection. We did everything together, camping, the beach, hiking, traveled, cooked dinners together, played video games.. After a little over a year we started to clash.. My jealousy and insecurity from failed past relationships came to a head, she has always been independent and has space issues. Yet she thrives on attention. She also has a low self esteem.

Anyways, I have been trying like hell to move on, and do the whole pua thing, and honestly it's been a good run. I've been meeting a lot of really cool girls, my confidence is coming back, I'm feeling sexier and stronger. However, I cannot get her out of my mind. I am in love with her, I knew it and I know it now.. I have to let go, but there's a long story that I can't get into and I;ve explained it in more detail in an earlier post.

To put it out there, I wouldn't leave her alone the last time we broke up, she wanted space and I didn't follow the NC rule like I had previously when we split up. She came back to me that time.. If you've seen "Good Luck Chuck" our relationship was almost identical, my ex is OBSESSED with penguins and I was obsessed with her being around me. When we split up I didn't believe it was over for good, because she could never make up her mind. She kept giving me mixed signals.. Well safe to say, I wouldn't stop calling and texting her and randomly showing up at her place. One morning I woke up to a protection order.

30 days went by NC (obviously) and I went to court. She looked depressed, like she didn't want to be there either, she told them she wanted to extend the order but when the judge said for 2 years or 1, she thought long and hard about it and I could tell she didn't realize what she had gotten into. She said "a year I guess is ok" all sad looking down at her feet. She could've gotten 2 years... I know in my heart that she didn't want it to be this way, I know she wanted to teach me a lesson and probably was hoping to extend it for another 30 days or so..

So I haven't seen her, and can't have contact directly or indirectly until 12/2/2012. UNLESS she has it lifted, and that would mean she would have to go to court herself, stand before the judge and tell him or why she wants it lifted. I know my ex, she does love me that hasn't changed. But she is too proud and nervous to do that.

What do I do? Moving on is really my only option. I'm still blocked on FB from her so neither of us can see each other, our posts, nothing... So little quotes, videos, etc won't do anything.. I am a graffiti artist of many years and thought about doing a big mural that says "I miss you" near where she works that she may see... Maybe do a big cartoony penguin!? I feel lost without her. No amount of ass from HB's is going to take her off my mind. I'm love sick and need help...

Some may not want to help me, but I am 31 years old, I AM NOT GOING TO BREAK THE LAW. I am big boy and need any advice you may have that could help me if there's a snow cones chance in hell that she still loves me and will cmoe back. What could I do?

Please help this time guys, please!?

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It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not.

I was obsessed with her being around me...

This is when you screwed everything up for the future.
I know it is hard, 'm experiencing something similar, only I stopped in time as in at the point the said I don't even want to be friends with you anymore at this moment. (I dumped her, because I needed space, wanted her back but she moved on.... you get the story).
If you gone to court versus her, you screwed it all up.
You should stay out of her live, get a grib on yours, maybe in a year, 2, 3.. 20 you'll meet her again .. but at least you won't be obsessed anymore.
If you can't meet her in a "normal way" you won't have a future anyway so stay out of there. Don't do special stuff as graffitting something for her, she will only feel more pushed and scared.

Basic idea, move on.

I'm guessing by the amount of views and no replies this is a subject that people are avoiding. 99% of the men out there will tell me to move on, that I'm crazy for even thinking about rekindling something with this girl, or that I'm just plain nuts...

Haha, I don't blame any of you for thinking these things.. Here is a quote by Mr. Friedrich Nietzsche that I feel sums up my situation-
"There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness".

I am not in any way going to reach out to her, because doing so will potentially land my ass in jail. I may be out of my mind in love with this girl, but I'm not stupid. At least not that stupid.. So, working out, going out, meeting people, taking up new activities and hobbies will help a little to get me through this dark time. But I am wondering how I can attract her back..

On a side note, she didn't get the order because I'm a psycho stalker. She did it for her own reasons, and I'm almost positive she felt that it's the only way she can get over me. Which sucks that she would actually go that route to put me out of her life... She didn't want it permanently, she could've went the whole two years, but didn't. She may lift it, but who knows!?

Please guys, think outside the box on this one, throw me a line or something... I know that some of you have been here... Love makes us do crazy things...

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It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not.

You are asking for hope. I am only stating there isn't.
Not in the next year... or whatever.
You can always try in 2 years (if you still think she is amazing then) ask if she wants to go have a drink. But at this moment you came to a point you are just screwed.
You'll feel pain, think about her 24/7 ... but that is just love.
If you want, join the chat and 'll speak with you in private

There arent lines enough. If atraction and love was that simple, the world would be full of natural puas...

Iknow you dont want this advice but

The best advice, is boost your ego, have fun... and some day you will forget her.

Maybe in the meantime she will see how much fun, and how much girls you have in your life , that she will start rationalize, and thinking she did a bad move breaking up with you. But you got to move.

If you chase her... you are just asking for suffering, and losing the respect for you.

My experience tells me , that they find there way home sooner or later. if you do things rights.

But to be honest for her to ask protection order... I doubt that this girl will ever comeback.

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Oh! You've gotta be kidding me!

The only way to get her back is to do what snake doctor said.

I got my ex back eventually when I was in your shoes, probably even felt even worse than you do now.

I got her back due to pua, but I was also geting better girls so I kissed her and rejected her.

Just goes to show, you will get over it. You need this in your life. This moment. Cherish it and embrace it because believe it or not it's the best thing that could ever happen to you.

you sound like my dad after my mom left him. my question to you is, did she ever make you any sandwiches? and if so, were they good? as far as how to get over her goes... try picking up a sport or something. bettering myself usually did the trick for me.

My friends, thank you for your words of advice.. It's not easy..
I just can't see why she would really go the distance to put an order on me, when I know that she only did it to distance herself from me. She was addicted to me like a drug, and as long as I was around, within arms reach of a cellphone she couldn't resist me. She always used to say that I was manipulating her!?
I don't know if it was some of the PUA stuff I had been studying over the course of the last few years or not.. Maybe I was subconsciously!?

It's been all in all 4 months since we broke up, and only since before Thanksgiving (I know right) when I was served with papers.. I could've fought it in court. There was no abuse, protection from what?? Her uncontrollable urges, and inability to just clean break. The saddest part of all of this is you are all right. Maybe in a few years if ever, we will be a part of each others lives again. I've already forgiven her, because honestly I was acting ridiculous like "Good Luck Chuck".. Smothering the shit out of her.. She did what she felt she had to I guess..
I would be her friend if anything because I truly love her that much, take my word for it.. I'm 31 years old and have been around the dating/relationship block many times and have never felt this toward anyone, ever. And I've chased rejection, I've felt the burn... This is more.. Like her and I met at the wrong time in our lives.

I've been out and about, and my game is strong as hell.. I don't know if psychologically being in love and dwelling on one woman is giving me the ability to not give a shit about whether or not other girls like me. But it's working.. I am literally, no joke, juggling 7-8 girls, 4 of which I've F-Closed already and the rest to come.. It's all fun and is a sure confidence boost, but it doesn't fill that void.

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It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not.

I would be her friend if anything because I truly love her that much, take my word for it.. I'm 31 years old and have been around the dating/relationship block many times and have never felt this toward anyone, ever. And I've chased rejection, I've felt the burn... This is more.. Like her and I met at the wrong time in our lives.

=> Don't.
Getting friends in the worst you can do right now.
In a few years that may be a plan but not now. You may think you have it all under control but you probably don't. And I doubt friendzoning yourself is a great move for the long run?

You sound like a cool guy, I don't know what was in your head to be so obsessive to earn that protection order. It doesn't look good. You may have had a good thing, but if it has come to the protection order, you must admit it's over. The graffiti idea is great, a big, romantic statement etc. I don't know if it'll help at this point. She has moved on and there is nothing you can do. If it'll set your mind to rest, do the graffiti, but decide that's the last thing you'll do in order to salvage things with her. I hope you realize it's really a long shot. Snake Doctor is right. Just learn your lesson and don't make the same mistake when the next special girl comes along, and she will eventually, trust me, even if you can't see it now.

Good luck!

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rAFC and yes, I'm a chick.

I have bursts of being a lady, but it doesn't last long.

"Sometimes we want to be surrounded by the things we love..."

She was my best friend, my lover, and partner in crime.. I got jealous, and overly possesive for valid reasons. Probably a bit overboard, but it was just.

Thank you for your support.. I may throw something up on the wall. I know nobodies ever done that for her, a lot of things were her first with me.. What we had was very special, I know in my heart she misses me, I just know it.

I see women that have been beaten lifting orders all the time. Why not for me? I didn't do anything but get a bit too clingy (big mistake). She will eventually see she made a grave mistake..

As did I...

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It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not.

Oh boy

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Ok, i'm going to be direct to you.

There are millions of girls where you can have the same attraction with. It's attraction, it naturally happens between male and female.

Most relationships end after 2 yrs, that's when the natural attraction fades, the other years, are based on memory + comfort.

You haven't fucked another girl.

Your inner game sucks. You like her so much, because she was the only one who liked you back. And now she's gone... Bye confidence boost. (That's why you get jealous, out of Scarcity, you used her to get confidence)

-> You don't believe there are other girls for you

now... go actually fuck other girls, not just meet, fuck them.

Go fuck 5 good looking girls and re-read your post here. You'll laugh at it.

ook.. I'm going to be even more direct.

The only person you need to get over is yourself.

This woman does not want to be with you. She doesn't want to hear from you. You are blocked from her phone, her Facebook, and her life for a reason.

You keep telling yourself this; and you're just deluding yourself to the fact that you should take everyone's advice here and just move on.

Forcing yourself on her in any way is just going to get you into trouble.

is this guy for real?