im pretty new to the whole pua thing, my mate just lent me 'the game' and i loved it but afterwood it just clicked why this girl from school has been after me for ages even tho i dont like her. it started cause we made out wen we were both drunk at a party, i wasnt that interested in her but she was apparently a bit keen on me so when i saw her next at school i just blew her off, then i felt bad about it so i talked to her casually later but then she started to flirt with me so i gave her negs cause i thought that would turn her off me and this seemed to keep happening in cycles till now where she is a bit scarily obsessed lol. i always just thought she had no self respect but i guess my natural game is just too good :p if i only i could start doing it to the chicks i do like. just wondering if u guys had any similar experiences after u looked back on how u used to try and pick up after learning game

It's not too complicated actually, I had this happen one time in HS with a HB5 who was just not my type.

The key is to think of this as a Choose Your Own Adventure Novel, except in real life. There are three paths to choose from here.

1) Turn off your game by going AFC. Not too hard to do. Don't do this in view of the public. This will get her off your case.

2) Keep it where it's at, she's actually DHVing you in the eyes of the other girls. Nothing wrong with a little flirting, inadvertent or not.

3) Escalate. This is assuming you find her attractive and are interested. Keep doing what you're doing and just get slowly more physical.

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I totally did this with a sweet girl in college who I was not at all attracted to. She was a swimmer.....BIG GIRL....just did not do it for me. I had a lot of classes with her, and I was always joking around with her....busting on her....then ignoring her at other times. She fell HARD. It did not work out well....and I felt really really bad in the end about how broken up she was.

My other experience with these sorts of unexpected consequences is what eventually led me to discovering evolutionary psych, PU, etc....

I worked with this girl who was one of the few true HB9.5+s I have ever known. She was simply amazing.....the type of girl who walks into a club or bar and all the other beuatiful women stop talking and glare at her. Very funny, smart, a bit of a tomboy...she did not like other women much.... very tough exterior, very intimidating in a way, if you did not know her.

She was going through a divorce (All star Alpha hubby who treated her like an accessory), and 'on the rebound' - or so I thought- she got together with another guy at work. I was just crushed at the time. I had missed my chance....but I was such an AFC I would have crashed and burned anway. So I was #1) a total AFC and #2) totally smitten #3) totally stuck in this belief system that she was out of my league anyway #4) a master at hiding how I felt. Pathetic.

This very strange relationship developed. I was totally bummed about her being with this other dude (I was caught up on him being some peon technician while I was a division manager), and she was perceptive enough to see that there was something going on with me (ie I was totally depressed...but hid it very well). I was also interesting enough to her that she kept prodding me...trying to dig deeper. It did not hurt that I was pretty high up in the company as well. Women like to keep those kind of options open you know.... Anyway, she was actually insecure enough about herself to not assume I was bummed over her. She was always trying to hook me up with friends, etc. which never went anywhere because I had zero interest in anything but her....and since I hid that...it just looked like I had no interest in women SHE wanted to set me up with. Secrectly I considered it insulting/pathetic. I did go out with a few women, especially toward the end, which built some jealously...but I'm getting ahead of myself.....

Either way from the start I would joke around with her...bust on her...make fun of her. I NEVER NEVER showed any interest in her at all. I just totally hid that. Man it was killing me. At the same time, I had resigned myself to having no chance....I just had fun with it. Generally whatever she wanted me to do, I would do the opposite just to mess with her.

I travelled a lot for work, but whever I was in the office, it became a daily ritual...she would come into my office at about 3:00 (I had an isolated office) and spend about 1/2 hour just hanging out and joking around. She was always getting these cramps in her neck from kickboxing...and I would freakin give her neck rubs! Sometimes in the middle of a neck massage, I would suddenly kick her out of my office because I had 'things to do'..."quit bothering me woman". Sometimes she would even come into my office at random times with this strange look on her face...drop a major fart...and leave. I had no idea what I was doing at the time, but in many ways it was pure game....but I was gaming beause I was so far down the pathetic AFC scale.

When her cat died....she called me crying. All sorts of emotional things like this she would call me or come see me. Yet I never made a move. At the same time this was going on, I was being courted by a competitor. Finally at lunch one day I tell her I am leaving in 2 months to go to work for another company. 1:30 pm after lunch she calls me from here desk hysterically balling because I am leaving....in 2 months. I start thinking... what the hell is going on here. Still....I held back. Finally the day comes 2 months later. The day before I give notice, I have lunch with her. After lunch sitting in her car I tell her how I feel, tell her that I am leaving because I can not stand dealing with this BS (that and it was a much better job...but I did not tell her that) she starts crying...tells me I can't leave her....we make out like crazy. From there it just gets more and more complicated.... In the end it becomes this giant pathetic crazy drama. At least I got some action out of it. By this time she is moved in with this guy...she knows he is going to ask her to marry him....and she has already decided she would say yes. But now she is telling me that never in her life...ever...has she felt anything like she does for me....not even with her first husband. She never even mentions the guy she is living with! So there is all this pressure on me because she would be leaving her likely husband for the unkown blah blah blah. In the end I just walked away....and she married this guy!

In retrospect everything likely worked out for the better for me in the long run. In my view, she is not a very self aware person and has a lot of issues. We had this tremendous emotional connection, but I am certain it would have been chaos. More importantly in the end it will change my life. Why? Because that whole chain of events made me realize how much your behavior around women really does affect what they feel towards you. It is not how you look, it is not your job, your money. This of course lead to research and study, and eventually PU...where the answers explaining all her craziness...and why she fell so hard for me despite the absurd situation and my mostly AFC ways, could be found.

As an aside, she still calls me once in a while. She does not even seem like the same person anymore. All the things that used to REALLY set her apart (her humour, witiness, quirky outlook on life) seem to be gone. In a way I feel sad. Funny how the tables turn...

Ed, that's beautiful man. I'm speechless.

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I think I've seen that kind of thing before in soap opras. I feel your pain, but I also feel your happiness at having taken a better road. It really is weird how if we ignore women they will do whatever it takes to get our attention. Most of the time anyway. I just can't help wondering, if they all knew about PU, would that really make a difference? I don't think so. I had a girl over the other day with the forum up on my computer, the first thing she saw when she came into my room! We still ended up sleeping together, because I don't think she noticed, but it was incredible! Great stories, very inspiring. Shalom.

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Your Humble Servant and Brother,

Cohath

The constant Negs and blowing off etc. Does this work for all girls? My expirience is that this tends to work better on girls that do have a lot of "Issues" because this is how they are use to being treated, but a girl that has usually come from a steady healthy relational background, does this SPAM still work?

...magnum,

I am not sure I can answer your question. This girl was one of the best people I have ever knows as far as being a good hearted person.

The only physical thing she was remotely insecure about was her weight....and this stemmed from the past. She was a big girl in HS. One those women you look at and say man if she lost 35# she would be a 10. Well....that is how her husband got to know her. He made her come to the gym with him and taught her to workout, eat right, stay fit. Her biggest insecurity was probably overall self value, and I mean this in a good way. She was very demanding of other people...and few fell into her 'worthwhile people' category. When you are hard on other people like that, you are also hard on yourself.

She had issues, but I don't feel she was the classic insecure beauty constantly seeking validation and creating chaos. So why did 'game' type stuff have such a strong effect on her? I think it was because she was just a very very emotional woman...and she hid it with a tough exterior. A chick to the second power when it came to emotion....and that's what a lot of game really is...making women feel that roller coaster of emotion. As I noted before, she also was not that self aware when it came to these emotions. She really felt this crushing guilt when she had all these feelings for me and she was living with this other guy. To this day she tries to deny them. She basically believes she was out of her mind for a while!

It may be that the outwardly cold, harsh women (as long as they are good at heart) are trying to hide the fact that they are so emotional. That barrier is so tough to break through, that you never get the point that you can game them. This was a unique situation. We worked together for 18 months. I was a division manager, and she was the marketing manager....so she did a lot of support work for me (though she in no way worked for me). Basically I could not avoid her....and could not help but get past the initial demeanor that someone who talked to her for 10 minutes in a gym or bar never had a prayer of getting through.

Also, one reason I could bust on her.... for a full year!.... was that she could give as good as she got. She would come right back at you. She loved banter....she had a great sense of humour. Smart. How many 9.5-10s do you know that make fun of themselves? Also, even more than making fun of her....mostly I defied her. In a fun way, I would go out of my way to not do what she wanted me to....and point it out. Again, it was a lot like the stuff David D talks about.

Also, it was not all fun and lighthearted. We had some pretty deep conversations about the crap things that each of us had gone through in life, and there was a pretty deep connection there.

Now this is important... She had very emotional memory associations. She felt like a failure for getting divorced, and once in a while she would see someone who she had some past association with from when she was married. Even though this person might have had nothing to do with her ex...the fact that they were from that time frame would bring back all these memories, and she would get all bummed. It was like a light switch. Certain places also did this to her. Seeing a car like she drove when she was married would depress her..not because she missed the car...but because the memory association made her feel like a failure! This is one thing women do/feel that mystifies men. Women have these memory associations that trigger strong emotions.

The funny thing is I could recognize it sometimes...see it on her face...and know exactly what was going on. She would get this certain look in her eyes...sometimes for only a second...then she would try to hide it. Then I would let her know that I knew what she was feeling...in an empathetic way. This was simply based on something she had just experienced...and how she reacted to it. She would look at me in stunned disbelief and say "how could you know...?". I would just say "I see it in your eyes". I you can do this even once or twice and you will be the 'only person that really knows her'.

Also, don't use this unless you are genuine. It is powerful, and using this when you are not genuine is manipulative....almost cruel

act like a girl. let her chase you and dont give in and brush her off. this makes you look like you have more value in the eyes of other girls