okay so I'm going to talk a little about my story to get my point across.

I started PUA in college after about one year I hadn't had sex w any girls that didn't come to the campus hoping to have sex that day, that being said one girl. I gamed many many women but it just didn't work out.

Frusterated I put down the PUA thing and instead of sarging all the time and trying to improve my skills w women from what people like Adam lyons gambler and all those people said. instead I began setting goals to improve myself that weren't dependent on how I did w other people, instead of sarging I'd be working out, I found a job as a bartender and began doing cool things...instead of sarging. After being in the real world and doing cool things as opposed to this sarging world I began dating multiple women one of these women ended up being my longest relationship because I liked her, we got along and she was a likable attractive person.

After breaking up with her I got back into PUA for another year, I managed to date one cute girl I met at a club sarging (actually my first day back out). Getting rejected a million times and having sex with some girl every once in a while that was the kind of girl who liked guys who go to bars approaching girls and spend a lot of their time doing that in other words mostly girls who weren't particularly doing cool things in this world. Frusterated I put the PUA thing to bed.

Started working out again improving my resume and began to serve in americorps, I lived for a year with just myself and two beautiful women (by anyones standards) we were all doing cool things in the world and I wasn't spending time sarging instead spending my time actually becoming high value instead of learning in some curveball way how to become it. Never had sex w any of these girls, in fact one of them is a great great friend of mine to this day. I did meet many many women but there wasn't a girl who i really liked, who challenged me, except one girl...

I never tried to game her and never thought about PUA but instead worked on myself and just communicated with her at a point that I really liked her. Long story short she (in my eyes) was the highest value girl I've ever met. She was always inspiring people and helping people had a beautiful laugh was nice ot everyone and everyone loved her, she has a lot of promise of really doing great things as she grows, she told me that she had hoped i would tell her this said she looked up to me and we've kept in contact since. I never had sex with her and she lives across the country now. The point is is that my life story is now a little more beautiful that I know such a beautiful girl looks at me this way, I have her support and if we ever get a chance we'll def give it a try.

However now this is one of the many things i carry with me one the things that nurtures my high value. Since then I started a project in Haiti (I'm very ambitious) and have met a absolutely beautiful girl Yoga instructor, Masters degree, leader of women stands for what she believes in and brings positive energy into a room that everyone loves. This girl really really likes me and is always the one pushing for us to stay in contact, I have noooo game. I avoid game. I only try to do whats reasonable and good in every circumstance and try to do things and work on things that have meaning in this world. I've even told this girl that I used to go to bars to pick up girls but was never really good at it but I also tell her the truth that I'm doing great things and always improving myself in ways that arent interdependent. I carry these good things everywhere I go.

I've met extremely high quality women when focusing on myself and being a normal person in this world jsut trying to make and impact and do good things. I've never met a high quality girl when into the pua sarging, simply because as a human I can only use so much energy, when directing that energy towards being good with women (goals that are dependent on others) I'm wasting valuable value building time, i don't do good but when I direct that energy towards improving myself (going to the gym standing for what i believe in, learning etc.) and bringing these things in the world and expressing them, I become of higher value and carry this high value everywhere I go.

Yes I've had sex w this girl. Since giving up the PUA thing and focusing my efforts on making an actual impact on this world and adding to peoples lives (some beautiful women banging them or not), another thing to note is I've surrounded myself with positive really cool people (men and women) doing cool things in this world (Working for Television, Movies, Peace corps, artists, teachers, CEO's, business owners) all kinds of interesting cool individuals) I have an excellent support system.


The Pua thing is a backwards approach to showing value, what we need to concentrate on is developing ourselves in the real world and becoming high value as opposed to going backwards on a superficial level and trying to learn how ot act like you have value or learning value through others reactions of you.

90% of people who study PU think it's all above routines, openers, DHVs ect... The first book I read or seminar I ripped always talked about making yourself an attractive person first. This includes doing things you like, being a good person, becoming interesting. Never anything about pretending. So you actually took the advice hidden in these forums and in PU material. PU is only suppose to add on to your life like a watch to a wardrobe. People take it to seriously with all the non-sense of sarging 7 days a week and there lives are empty(filled with girls).

On a side note, I'm sure your new life and interacting with women has improved your social skills and comfortability with women.... making you somewhat natural. The purpose of PU is to make this happen aswell.

I read it through a couple of times, and I´ve got to say that I love it!

Good read, deserves respect!

However, it is my firm belief that you need a basic game plan, and I do not like the phrase "high value".

Other than that, it is gold.

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Common sense, moral and humility will get you anywhere.

Thanks common sense I like the little thing you got there about humility.

I'm glad you got the results you were looking for without the use of pickup.

However, if "being yourself" was all it took to get women, NOBODY would need pickup.

So, while it's good that it worked for YOU, there are lots of people who never got a girl just because they worked out or started a project.

Most women won't open you or approach you if you're just out doing regular things. Therefore, I could go to the gym every day and still come home alone, and/or feeling like shit, wondering when I'll EVER get a girl, ASSUMING I was the type that couldn't GET one. (I CAN get girls, I'm just not at the level I'd LIKE to be.)

So remember, just because it worked for you, doesn't mean it'll work for everybody.

_________________
I speak about the things I know, and ask about the things I don't.

Sangoma3, props. I agree with the heart of your message completely. That has been, in my experience and observation, the best way to make yourself of lasting value.

When I first discovered the PU universe, a mere three months or so ago, I instantly got concerned that all the culture does is teach you how to act in a way that will immediately appeal to women. Not so. What you discover from the wisdom of long-time PUAs, is that ultimately our most fulfilling direction in life is one that builds us up as human beings and citizens of the planet.

Now, as far as I am concerned, I have been doing productive, constructive, and interesting things (I work in film and the performing arts) and derive immense satisfaction from the work I do and the people I have met.

However, the one area in my life that feels out of whack are my relationships with women, to which I have turned to the PU culture to learn more about. PU, for me, is all about learning to contextualize the experiences I have and a forum of examples from which to mold my future game plan, tailored to my needs.

Bravo for making a difference in the world!

- Artiste

I agree with most of what you have written. The best way to increase your value is to prove it to the world, not just yourself.

As much as a positive mindset can get you laid, the best way to realise your dreams is with an overall positive image. I don't think this can be achieved with confidence alone.

Thanks for the post, I have recently split with a long term GF and it is usefull to read posts like this.

Everything you do now can be deconstructed into "Game".

Think about it.
You are demonstrating higher value by doing high value things and by trying to make a change. You are building rapport by actually getting to know the girls. No matter how you do it when you kiss it's a K-close. When you fuck it's a F-close.

In a way you are more of a PUA than most people here, that I know.

You see being a pick-up artist isn't about lying to people and acting high value. It is about improving yourself (sometimes through unconventional means) to the point where you don't have to pretend anymore.

When I started pick-up I had to invent most of my DHV stories. After a couple of months, after a couple of relationships and taking up swimming classes, I could tell DHV stories from my own past, from my own experience.

So keep up the good work and best of luck

_________________
Dating - a waste of time and money

P.S. Not a native English speaker

I AM that Guy. i go to the Gym six days a week. look ripped as hell but still dont get girls. i get attention, and if im lucky,i'll have some interaction from women and men but this isnt necessarily anything positive or go very far. im strictly speaking about friendship here so in other words i rarely have any friends and i doubt if i was to disappear one day any one would really care.

i am Being myself. but believe me that's not helpful

I AM that Guy. i go to the Gym six days a week. look ripped as hell but still dont get girls. i get attention, and if im lucky,i'll have some interaction from women and men but this isnt necessarily anything positive or go very far. im strictly speaking about friendship here so in other words i rarely have any friends and i doubt if i was to disappear one day any one would really care.

i am Being myself. but believe me that's not helpful