Yo... happy weekend guys,

So here's the deal.... there's a guy I work with who acts dominant. For example, he orders the younger guys around ("Do this" not "Can you please..."), he's cocky and funny with them (condescending humour, calling them bitches), if he wants to talk to you he just waves you over (I invariably ignore him until he asks). I've known him for a while, he didn't used to be that way, I honestly just think he's overcompensating for something, though I doubt others see through it.

He's not my boss, and I don't have to deal with him directly much at the moment, but I'd be interested to hear what you guys think is the best way of dealing with this kind of person.

Ok, so if a guy treats you in a dominant way (eg. tells you to do something in a dominant voice tone), here are the options I can think of:

• 1. Just do what he says - obviously a very bad option
  
  2. Refuse and make him ask nicely "say the magic word" - Ok but I don't like this option much - I think it could make me look like a fussy little pussy (like the nerdy guy out of Goldeneye )
  
  3. Non-verbal - look at him with strong body language as if to say, I'm not going anywhere or doing anything - seems like a good idea, though if he keeps pushing the issue I would have to resort to something else
  
  4. Use a cocky and funny slap down - eg. look round room and say "I don't see a dog here... oh, you're talking to me!?" - probably a good idea, but sometimes difficult to think of things like this on the spot

Anyways, interested to hear your wise thoughts as always. Peace!

bro, i think we've all came across characters like this. i certainly have, more than once. the best way to deal with them is to get out your head and just say and do whatever comes into your head. all that amog bullshit is a fake concept. trust me, just be yourself get out of your, say what ever comes into your mind, like you probably did at school. im going on bcos i used to think the same way how can i comeback and all this but just do what i said. the people who are nice and just speak their mind have ALL the friends because they are so open. and yeh add a bit of cocky and funny if it pops into your mind.

I'd say "If you wanna get something done right ya gotta do it yourself, so you better get on that shit."

I have a similiar situation.

This kid I used to be buddies with in high school works at the same place as me. It is a restaurant.

Anyways, he is always making smart ass remarks none of which I can remember but he is loud and definitely an AMOG or trying to be one. He definitely has the social proof with stories he tells and actions he exhibits. I am new to this and am just reading The Game and had read Tyler Durdens way of dealing with an AMOG that afternoon. What I did was call him out on it, this is how the conversation went down

I can't remember exactly what he did or said..but this was my reply

me: Man, you're so good at being an AMOG
him: haha, an anog? what is that?
me: nah man, you're pretty alpha you know that?
him: hell yeah I am
me: yeah, you're so in charge, bro. I mean...I love that ralph lauren perfume you're always wearing...it smells so pretty. *patting him on the back really hard" and that A&F torn up hat? you could totally be one of those guys on the billboard...I mean assuming you're comfortable being naked with other men.


and he just tried diffusing my negs/insults by acting like it was a joke, doing some fake posing, saying he totally would do that etc.


another time he was eating something and said something with his mouth full and I responded

me:holy shit you sound like Bobby Boucher!
girl waitress:omg he does, that movie was so funny
him: quoting a line from that movie


Later on I called him out asking why he was always shit testing me and that how does he react when he gets tooled.

pretty much what I saw and what he said was just play it off, act like it doesn't matter and like you're old friends who are just busting each others chops.

Thanks for the replies. I guess the important thing is your frame of mind. If you're feeling happy and confident and you maintain that without falling into a submissive frame then you're all good. I like the idea of just joking around and being friendly, but not giving in. Cheers!

If you have to do the thing hes asking you to do, Id jump up walk towards him like you own the place and slap him on the shoulder and be like "Yeah sure" and walk away

or

him : dakjdfbkjdfb
you : yeah ?
him :skbgfmngbnf
you : sorry what was that ?
him :skbgfm.....
you : I hear dyou the first time
you : hmmmmm .................. nah rather not

Really, none of those options sound so great. The best thing you can do is just appear completely unfazed by anything he says. Play him down, don't play yourself up. If he asks you to do something which you have right to refuse, just say no. Don't even look up. Just act like he's nothing you're concerned with. If you're in a group situation and he starts talking you down, play along with it. A good example of this is the whole:

Him: (to girls) Haha, he's just compensating because he has a tiny penis
You: Oh yeah, haha. It's practically invisible. Like 3 millimeters or something.

If he affronts you, don't even stand up to his challenge. Just look at him in a bemused way and continue what you're doing. Unless you think of something genuinely funny and original, don't make witty comments or insults. It makes you look like you're trying, which you don't want to do. Just make him look like he isn't a threat to you, at all.