@kasabi.

Thanks for posting kasabi.

You're right about the linear approach. I need to tackle all the facets of the problem at the same time. That's what I'm trying to do. Getting a job for example would allow me to tackle a series or points. Having a better social circle would give me more opportunities to go out too. I do not need it, but it does make things way easier...
I already go out everyday, even if it's just to go to the local mall. It just makes me feel good. I love having interactions with people.
That's something I should be reminded more often. I put a lot of pressure on my shoulders, and when I can't figure it out, I beat myself up since there's nobody else to blame. I'm really demanding when it comes to myself. I have to relax more and take everything less seriously. I spend more time worrying that actually moving forward...

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On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

im kinda inspired by you dude. You came back to a situation where you knew that you might encounter trouble. Now you r there and are feeling lonely and maybe depressed.

I am in this same predictament. I returned to uni after a break and now its awkward unfortunately. I realize after 3 months that i am the only one i can depend on. Im like a killer, trust no one, hit on every hot girl lol

I focused on a few people that i knew that i could not be "great" freinds but good friends until my social situation finds itself again. (i do not want to go into my situation but basically my social circle collapsed due to some major event that was out of my personal control). now i socialize with my acquaintances from last year and now they are my "good" friends.

I really do enjoy spending time with them but of course nothing can be the same as the past and a perfect situation. But this is not what i focus on, i focus on my future with these people, others especially hot chicks

I take steps to cope with getting back on track. You do too. I agree that your first step is to get a job. But while you do that, you need to wake up everyday at the same time and go to the gym in the morning, shower, eat breakfast and then get your day going. I was very depressed because i was lazy and not productive but when i slept 9 hours a night and routinely woke up and went to the gym i felt, looked much better. It also helped me find myself and a job for the summer! I met someone at the gym and they hired me as a lifeguard at the local beach.

Instead of finding jobs at home on the computer or in the newspaper, i recommend going around the city wearing a suit and tie and just walk into certain buisnesses and introduce yourself. You have nothing to lose and with a good swagger, body language, good resume and confidence, you never know. they may even give you an interview!

Good luck bro

J Slay

_________________
Slayin ladies all around the world

You miss 100% of the shots you never take.
- Wayne Gretzky

@J Slay.

Thanks for posting.

I'm not really depressed, but yeah I spend most of my time by myself. I have some friends but it's hard to see them... and I would definitely try to do something FUN for once.
Indeed, I have a "to-do-list" for every day. I work out (at my place though) every 2 days and get out every day to get some social interactions. Laziness can't be totally avoided obviously, but the more I show self-discipline, the more confident I am about myself. I've actually read some stuff about this, I should write a post on this subject.
I should try harder when it comes to get a job, that's sure. The thing is I was not sure where to go or what I really wanted to do or where I wanted to work... All of this got me stuck, I froze. Yet I understand that a job is just a support for a lifestyle. I am not my job. I am more than that. Getting a job will allow me to have a regular flow of money, which is good to travel, find a place to live and finally get things going.

Daniel..

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On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Quick Update.

Here's a quick update on my situation.

A job opportunity.
I got offered another short-term contract from the same communication agency I worked for. It would allow me to get more experience and have a big name on my CV (the client I would be working for basically rules the world and the Internet). My job would be to create a list of ~150 famous people and contact them so that the company can show them their newest updates of their service. I like the idea of being in contact with some celebrities... Yet, I'm all by myself in that contract... and I have no idea how to contact those people. Gotta figure this out before accepting the offer. On another note, this is not the "safe job" I'm looking for to get my life moving forward. I'll see what I do. Technically, this would get me busy until the end of December and I might meet some famous guys... (and I like this idea).

A birthday party.
It will be the only social events in weeks. A friend of mine is organizing her birthday party on Saturday night. I want to show my A-self at that party. I want to have fun, be the life of the party, have fun, have fun and have fun. I need it.

Daniel..

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Daniel, I think you need to take this job offer, with no other plans, it sounds too good to decline. Plus it will be a challenge for you and a hell of a DHV story down the line. Who knows what other great things can come out of it?

All the best!

Txa

_________________
rAFC and yes, I'm a chick.

I have bursts of being a lady, but it doesn't last long.

Daniel, keep it up. The main let emotions more girls.

Quick Update.

Just a very small update on my latest actions.

New hobby.
I've finally bought a guitar. I'm slowly learning the basics thanks to the material I find on the Internet. I actually enjoy learning. Let's see if I can become good at it in the end. I would feel really good about being good (even average actually) at something like this.

Warming up.
As written before, I'm going to a party tonight to celebrate some friends' birthday. I wanna show my best self. This means I need to prepare correctly. I'm going out this afternoon to buy some stuff. I'll warm socially while at the mall. Speak to strangers, ask questions and what's not. It will help me build momentum. As soon as I get back home, I'll prepare the night by writing a plan of actions.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Hey man, just a quick tip from an experienced guitarist. Learning off the internet is much harder and it is unlikely to provide you with a good base. I would really recommend getting some guitar lessons if you can afford them, they are reasonable cheap. If you start learning the correct way, it will be much easier, quicker and you won't have time to learn any bad habits, which you will HAVE TO un-learn later. Trust me on this man, even if it is just a few lessons like about 8, it will help loads at the start.

The internet is a great resource for guitar after you have a little ability, and some of the best guitarists have been complete self taught but these are exceptions to the rule. Randy Rhodes, Ozzy Osbourne's guitarist (for a while) used to get guitar lessons from the best teachers in every city he visited, and he was already amazing. And try to get a good teacher, not a boring grade based one (it really kills the enjoyment of guitar).


Good luck, learning the guitar is a rewarding and challenging experience, and girls love it! Whenever a girl is in my room without fail, when they see my guitar, they will ask me to play them something, and even ask me to sing (which i can't and i don't lol).

@SUB ZERO J010.

Thanks for the advice! I will indeed pay for some lessons as soon as I get a regular job. I'm not expecting to be Jimi Endrix soon, but I want to get at least average at it, and being able to play an entire song! That would already be a great improvement for me.

I'll use some legit videos I've found on the Internet to get comfortable with the guitar and then take some classes.
Indeed. :p I think being able to sing in addition to playing guitar would get you to a 100% ratio... haha

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

DAY 81: going to a birthday party.
Nothing to see here.

Context.
I've not been moving forward in a long time... Even if I see my friends now and then, I do spend most of my time by myself. Yes, it allows me to take care of myself, but it's not particularly a good thing when it comes to the Game. Tonight is the opportunity to get back on tracks.

Goals.
- Have fun.
- Show confidence.
- Be the life of the party.
- Focus on eye-contact and KINO.
- Warm-up.

Strategy.
- Have fun: feeling free to do/say whatever I want, joke around, smile...
- Show confidence: take the lead, eye-contact, KINO... read old field report from my journal, focus on the first 30 minutes, read my notes from Stormy's thread,
- Be the life of the party: open, speak to people, have fun...
- Focus on eye-contact and KINO: look in the eyes when I speak... use KINO gambit.
- Warm-up: warm up in the first 30 minutes, get social interactions.
____________________________________________________________________

Summary (for lazy people): it went okay... I quickly got bored though. There was not a single potential target.

The party.
It took me 2 hours to get there. I wanted to have fun, forget a bit about the whole situation. I knew most of the people there. The were a lot of girls... but no potential target at all... Even though I enjoyed seeing my friends again, I quickly got bored. The main subject of conversation was work. So what do you do now? Look at my new watch, blah blah blah. I tried to change the subject but it came back every time. I took several glasses of Martini to make myself at ease but the party was still pretty boring. I focused a lot on eye-contact, even on KINO but I was certainly not the life of the party. I was bored and tired. I managed to seed another event with my friends though.

____________________________________________________________________
On the strategy.
- Have fun: it was nice to see my friends... but that's pretty much it.
- Show confidence: I think I look confident as soon as I was not getting bored... so I didn't look confident too long...
- Focus on eye-contact and KINO: I did good eye-contact, even some KINO but since there was no target at all...
- Warm-up: I couldn't warm up properly.

On the game.
- I need to push it more, I'm tired of thinking "why didn't I do that?" afterwards
- I'm on my own here. If I want to change my lifestyle, I need to meet people, especially women. I'm tired of going to parties like this.
- I have to stop giving a single shit about what people think about me

Coming next.
- Restaurant with my friends.
- NYE at a friend's party (will be full of girls I don't know)


I got bored pretty quickly.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Hi Daniel,

Long time no speak, I love reading your entries but you seem to be slowing down a lot.

What happened to the old times... pick-up at bus-stops and in the town centre.

I want to hear to you getting back to this, because I want to get motivated to do the same! It's cold out there, because it is closer to Christmas but these are just excuses!

_________________
*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

Guitar is great Daniel.

how do you know when someone is guitarist the moment you first meet them?




They tell you.

DAY 82: going out, number closing and kiss closing.
"you're not obliged to touch my ass to talk to me"

Context.
I've written many times before how much it was hard for me to go out and truly have fun since my social circles are not really into partying. Yet, attraction is all about affirming status and dominance in a given situation, and the best way to do that is to get social interactions flowing. That's what I've tried to do last night. A French friend from Brazil, French natural, was in Paris and invited me to take a drink with some of his friends.

Goals.
- Have fun.
- Show dominance.
- Be the life of the party.
- Focus on eye-contact and KINO.

Strategy.
- Have fun: feeling free to do/say whatever I want, joke around, smile...
- Show confidence: take the lead, eye-contact, KINO... read old field report from my journal, focus on the first 30 minutes, read my notes from Stormy's thread,
- Be the life of the party: open, speak to people, have fun...
- Focus on eye-contact and KINO: look in the eyes when I speak... use KINO gambit.

____________________________________________________________________

Summary (for lazy people): I had fun and managed to have great social interactions with a lot of Brazilians who were at the bar. Speaking fluently Portuguese allowed me to build some value quickly. I've met a lot of people but my game was a bit rusty. I've only taken one number, give mine to a bunch guys and get a kiss close out of the blue.

Having fun and getting started.
French Natural invited several friends to have a drink. One of them was a Brazilian HB8,5, we quickly started to speak Portuguese and get to know each other. She was my friend's target so I didn't push it too much, but I teased her, called her "unfriendly" (which is pretty serious for a Brazilian) and played around. I couldn't really make any connection with her though, she was not giving me the attention I wanted. I just came in, I had no chance to create any value. That was okay though, I've done some KINO and got enough information to come back later, with more "value".

I've met another friend of French Natural, a French HB7,5. We spoke, I did a lot of KINO with her. She's blond and has something really sexual. I had a better experience with her. I had her attention. She saw me speaking fluent Portuguese, guess that helped. I've succeeded in creating some nice connections with her. But again, she was one of French Natural's targets.

The bartender opened a new room where a catching ring was waiting for us. I've put my name on the list to fight (with some ridiculous outfits not to hurt yourself) and won! Obviously.

Being social.
I was already a bit drunk when I realized the bar was actually getting full of Brazilians. The turning point was when I opened a group of Brazilians and started to speak with them. In less than 5 minutes, I've warmed up the pool like a boss. People were watching me talking with 5 or 6 people around me.

The situation changed. The Brazilian friend from French Natural was now coming to me. I noticed she used to have a piercing in the nose (like a lot of Brazilian girls do), I tried to talk her into showing me the one she had on her belly. It was fun but my game was not calibrated I think. French Natural joined me and that's when she asked if we wanted to kiss (we = the three of us). Being half drunk surely helped me accepting that offer. She felt so slutty afterwards that she left the conversation. I started to think it might have been a mistake. I was kissing a girl in front of a room full of potential targets. A quick look around me allowed me to see that nobody noticed anything.

A HB7 Brazilian girl that I've met by opening the set of Brazilians was now speaking to 2 cute girls. I opened the set by speaking Portuguese with her: "your friends really thought I was Brazilian you know"... She laughed, I was in the set. She introduced myself to them. We spoke a bit but they were kind of shy since French was not their first language. I learned they were Swiss (German part) and were in Paris to study French (like the Brazilian girl).

I needed to pee so I've ejected the set and get more social interactions with my friends when I got back. A moment later, I was back in the set. I was sat in a bar chair with a cute blond on my right and a cute Asian-typed girl on my left. We spoke about Paris and all... blah blah... I started to think about the # close. I finally got the cute HB8,5 blond number. It wasn't smooth but well, she was leaving and I needed that number.

Getting slapped.
The bar was now almost empty, I came back to the Brazilian friend of French Natural and started to talk with her. She was obviously a bit drunk, like I was. She told her friend that I called her unfriendly. The latter turned to me and told me I didn't know how to seduce girls. I actually thought that was not bad at all. It works well with girls with humor, you can play around with them. Yet, as I've written before, I had some troubled figuring her out. She was taking stuff too seriously, guess she was shit-testing me. At some point during the conversation, I couldn't hear what she was saying so I put my arm on her back. That's when she took a step back and told me "you're not obliged to touch my ass to talk to me". Whaaat? That's was unfair, I wasn't touching her ass at all: "I was not ..." wait, whatever that's a shit test: "Well now you're really being unfriendly" I said with a smile. She give me a little slap on the face and left like a little girl. I didn't appreciate that but I played it cool again. "Brazilian girls..." I laughed with the witnesses instead of feeling stupid.

I left soon after that. I had to catch the subway. I kissed her goodbye like there was nothing, she did the same. She actually was really friendly when was said goodbye.
____________________________________________________________________

On the strategy.
- Have fun: I did have fun, alcohol and being with my friend helped.
- Show dominance: I got a lot of value out of meeting a lot ...
- Focus on eye-contact and KINO: I did a lot of KINO, even got slapped for that.
- Be the life of the party: I wouldn't say I was the life of the party but I was definitely getting a lot of attention.

On the game.
- It's all about having status in a given situation: being high in the unconscious ladder of the social interaction creates attraction.
- I don't really like bar game: even though I had some success, I don't like this whole little drunk shit testing game.
- I was not on top of my game but managed to get results.
- I should take advantage of the momentum to get more numbers.

Coming next.
- I might go out Friday night with French natural again.
- I've organized a restaurant with some friends Saturday night


I was a bit rusty but I managed to get some results somehow.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Quick Update.

Here's a quick update on the actions following Wednesday night.

Texting Swiss Girl.
I've told her I would text her to give her my number (I had no coverage in the bar). I've sent her a small text on my way home.
Not perfect but I wanted to take advantage of the momentum. I also knew from experience that just texting "hey here's my number" would fail. On another note, I don't think I'm not sure about my game when it comes to her. As far as I remember, I didn't see a lot of IOIs (except that she asked me to call her once she typed her number on my phone). Anyway, I've received a text some minutes later.
I'll try to see her next week.

What's next.
- Brazilian Chick, the Brazilian friend of French Natural, has added me on Facebook and invited me to a party on Friday. Don't know yet if I'm going or not.
- Aside, I've successfully organized a restaurant with friends on Saturday night.
- I would like to get better at day game, following Insert's advice, I would like to focus on getting rejection. I'll update my goals after the holidays.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Quick Update.

Here's a small update about my progress in my journey.

Some good news.
I've just got a job interview for a consultancy firm in Paris. It's not the type of job I was looking for at the beginning but it's really really really well paid and would allow me to move forward. I hope I'll get this job. I've also received a nice letter this morning. I've officially graduated from my business school. That's great news for me. I need to celebrate!

Swiss Girl.
She's texted me this morning:
I told her I was free Sunday afternoon. I have to think where I'll take her... I'm really happy she actually sent this message... A girl that takes initiative, that's something I like. It's also a sign that I did a good job in that bar in the end.

_________________
On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)