Alright so me and my girlfriend are in college. Needless to say, a lot of stress comes with that from the work we have to do.

Obviously if there's a problem with the relationship, I should talk it out with her and help her fix it.

But if she's stressed out about the work she has to do, should I try to help her out with her stress by trying to ease it? Or should I just say "Good luck, talk to you later" and/or listen to her complain about it and then say "Good luck"

Also...if she has problems with her friends, should I try to give her advice on that? Or should I listen to her complain, give some response to show I was listening, and then move on to another topic?

Thanks.

This PUA thing went too far.

YES you should help your girlfriend with her problems when you can. For fucks sake.

Don'z cross your own bounderies ( for me it's her family problems for example). Other than than that if you're in serious relationship you're expected to help your girl.

No this isn't even PUA-motivated. When I try to help her she gets mad and starts disrespecting me. I'm not having any of that, so I tell her to stop disrespecting me and to deal with it by herself (never in anger, just in a normal and calm tone).

This has happened 3 times so far. So I'm asking if I should just stop trying to help her and leave her to deal with it herself

My bad. I'm sick of questions like "should I call my girlfriend every month or is that to often".

You didn't really mention this in your first post.

I was in same situation with my ex. Best thing is to let her know as soon as she starts talking about her problems that you'll only listen to her if she is interested in your opinion.

That wont stop her from telling you that she's interested in your opinion and be mad at you when you tell her what you think Baby steps.

I don't have any tolerance for "I'm just getting things off my chest". Talk to the wall bitch.

women talk too motherfucking much.

you know it, i know it, we all know it.

you ever see these goddamn hens gabbing away in the fucking grocery aisle? or the damn dollar store? or just about anywhere?

if there is a fucking human ear within shouting distance, a woman is genetically programmed to talk into the fucking thing...

anyway (rant over)

my point is this:

there is a fine line between:

- listening (letting her GENUINELY vent)

and

- enabling (letting her JUSTIFY stupid fucking decisions with your silence or approval)

it's a fine line.

of course it's a good thing to listen. and if your girlfriend has had something GENUINELY (this is the "key" word here) unfortunate, or painful, or difficult happen to her that she DIDN'T DIRECT CHOOSE OR CAUSE...then yes, just let her vent.

however, if she is just stirring drama, or causing bullshit, or clearly THE SOURCE OF HER OWN FUCKING PROBLEMS...do NOT listen to that shit without telling her that she is dead wrong. this is enabling. and it causes two problems. one for her and one for you. the problem that it causes for her, is it allows her to continue to do stupid shit, unchecked, without ever learning, growing, or maturing as a person. the problem that it causes for you, is that SHE KNOWS she is full of shit, and you are just sitting there listening to it, nodding, agreeing...you do that ^...and you will LOSE ALL CREDIBILITY in her eyes.

women say "MEN NEVER LISTEN".

well, i don't think that's the case. i think that men are actually willing to listen, HOWEVER, we just don't want to listen to STUPID BULLSHIT AND LIES from the fucking fairytale realm of chick-insanity.

enough is a god-damned enough.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

just tell her straight out:

i'm not your lapdog, i'm not your mini-me. i am willing to listen, but i am not willing to agree with stupidity and enable you. why? because it fucking insults my intelligence. if you have a problem with this, go find a man with no dick or balls. marry him. because that is what you are basically asking of me...is to be castrated. i'm not going to be fearful to speak my mind.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!