mid game stumble?



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 Post subject: mid game stumble?
PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2011 10:46 am 
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Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2011 9:43 am
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Location: uk
I am new here so am guessing this is a mid game question, I have been single for a while (own choise) now am looking into pu stuff, I am also interested in a woman where I get my plumbing supplies, briefly she has shown IOI's locked eye contact whith a smile, she offered to ring me about an order from work the other day even though it is not her job, very friendly and spends more time at the counter with me than others and sometimes doesnt aknowledge other customers while talking to me. There has been no kino as she works at a counter and I didnt think it would be approriate at her work, alslo she has a b/fbut has said things arent great and they dont see much of each other. just 2 weeks ago I slipped her a note with my number and note saying to ring for a coffee, I went back a few day later but she wasnt there, one of her colleagues told me he didnt think she expected me to give her my number and that was all, I saw her in there a week later but didnt say anything as I wasnt sure what the situation was and would have rather she said something to me. I cant figure out what she is thinking as I am still sure she is interested but may be shit testing me or may have been spooked as she might not have been comfortable enough with me. Any pointers for when I next see her? ie jokey abotu the number/not mention it/carry on flirty and friendly as usual? or try to fix a coffee date. Background I am going indirect approach as has has a b/f with the view to ramping it up on a meet up etc


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2011 1:42 pm 
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Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2010 2:15 pm
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for first instance a cardinal pua rule is that you do not give your number to the girl, you get her number because alot of girls are shy, play hard to get but most importantly they want you to be the man and make the right moves at the right times.

the reasons why she didnt call you are the following.
1) She is shy and not really a direct person to make things happen.
2) She likes you but as a friend and she's too nice to tell you the truth because she doesnt want to hurt your feelings.
3) She's not interested you in the romantic sense because you are not her type and still likes her BF.
4) She is interested in you romantically but doesnt want to disrespect her present relationship with her BF and is confused about the situation and doesnt know what she wants to do and do anything about it.

what i think you should do is to examine the interaction between you and the girl. found out the things you have and which things are missing e.g. if you know you already have attraction then you need to input some deep rapport and kino escalation. keep the rapport going with the girl and then you tell her to give you her number and then you set up a date with her and escalate from there.

here are some notes on attraction, building rapport, and number closing which might be of interest to you as well as some conversational techniques that i use all the time. enjoy.

one thing you should know is when to tease (push pull technique, negging etc). they should only be used if ur target is a 7.5 or above (or the girls who think they are 7.5 or above whereas in actual fact they are not). if you were to tease a girl below that rating, you would end of hurting and insulting them. in exclaimer for using negging and teasing is that one should positively validate their target before they negatively validate them. the reason to do it in this way is because one must hook their target in order to get their attention. so after the positive validation (for a set who is +7.5) you negatively validate them (tease, push) in order to put yourself at a higher level than them because at the beginning they are higher than you. the main reason why it is good to use negging is to challenge the ego of a girl of high calibre which is something that a typical afc does not do. and by doing this, it shows that u r a man that has high standards and does not go for just any girl and this will make the girl more interested and it will compel her to work harder to gain your approval because you have showed disinterest in her, told her that she does not fit your standards (negative validation). girls always want the guys that is surrounded by women and guys which are difficult to get, its a challenge for women to go after those guys.

building rapport is a very interesting process. in order to build a great emotional connection one must choose to talk about things which have deep emotional content. it does not matter what the girl does or likes, you can connect with her even if you have dissimilar interests. as you know all occupations and hobbies are completely different in their complexity, principles and structure, but there is one thing which all of them have in common/share "EMOTIONS". one must be empathetic and show a girl that u understand why she chose to do that job or hobbie by expressing the emotions that one feels when doing that activity, it shows that you're really trying to get to know her, and she will think "wow this is a great guy to talk to, he's making an effort to understand me, but wait, i dont know anything about him" and this will compel her to ask you questions and u can freely express yourself how ever much u want as long as u express urself passionately and positively. all the men dont do this at all and do not understand how much empathy is a powerful force and openly allow themselves to be perceived to see a girl superficially. you can use the concept of 'rapport' to ur advantage as well.

in order for you to build greater rapport with her, get used to asking more open-ended questions e.g. "what have you been up to?" or "What did u get up to today?", my one: "What monkey business did u get up to today?". dont use questions like "wats up hun?", thats a closed-ended question which the girl would simply answer and she wont give u much material to work on in order to reach the hook point.

and connect on her answers in a positive way. dont be afraid to tease her as well. dont be afraid to create impact. when telling a girl about a situation that happened to u on that day or in the week, give more details about it, women love details. it is also good to read the local news paper, women are usually very aware what happens in the world, u should as well. u can get her point of view on something in the news (nothing to do with which celebrity had sex with who) e.g. political, environmental, sociological etc and then she would ask you what u think and you can manipulate the conversation which can lead anywhere u want.

another way u can have an "endless conversation" is the principle of "Question, statement, Question, statement, Q, S, Q, S etc". so u ask an open question, receive the answer, and then make a statement about the last thing she said in order to ask a deeper question. this process can go round in a circle, it can go on for ages.

after you have the girl attracted to you and built rapport, here's how to make sure that you can get a definite number close and afterwards ensure a date in the future.

the way to ask a girl out is by 'offering' not asking permission, never ask "Do you want to go out tonight?" or "will you go out with me?" or "so what time are you free tomorrow?". They are all questions which AFCs do. they make a guy sound needy, desperate, dependent on doing something with her.

so before offering a date, let her know how busy and sociable you are. girls want guys who are difficult to get. usually in rapport with girls, to make sure she does not flake on u after the first meeting, there's a pua principle called 'seeding'. this is when u in plant an invitation in the conversation with her but u havent actually invited her. for example, you could say that "im thinking of going to this really cool bar sometime next week which i heard about". now usually when a guy mentions to a girl about going to a bar, club or party that u know, the girl will always expects the guy to automatically invite her. but what you would do is just to mention the party or the bar and continue on the conversation. this will catch the girl off guard and the girl will be thinking "hey, this guy is pretty cool (depending on the attraction and rapport), but he has just mentioned this party but why is he not asking me out?". she will think this and will be more compelled and desperate for you to ask her and she realises that she needs to work in order to get the invitation. women want to go to things that are hard to get into, exclusive and even more if they are told they cant go. people always want to go to things when they have been told they cant go. sounds so forbiden and interesting.

dont be in the position to be waiting for a girl to call you, women are lazy or busy but definitely unreliable. you make the contact. but when u contact, dont sound like you are too eager to see her, bad sign to show that ur desperate. in between texting a girl, act like u dont care if she ever replies back. i know it sounds crazy, but it does not feel good waiting, checking ur phone every so often seeing if the girl replies. have the frame of mind that u dont care about a reply, then u will feel less anxious, and more focused on ur game.

hope that i have helped. happy gaming dude ;-)


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2011 2:17 pm 
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Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2011 9:43 am
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Location: uk
Thanks for the reply MJ I am pretty sure the situation is 1 or 4. I dont think it is 2 or 3 as I am only offering freindship and coffee at the moment. I think I may need to build a little more rapport and comfort I may have rushed things a bit as we dont get too much time to talk so I may need to make sure when we do the content of the convo is as good as I can get it. She is 8-8.5 so I think a little push/pull may be in order to. Its annoying as I am pretty sure that a half hour coffee date I could speed things along but will just have to work with the time I have. Cheers


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 Post subject: Update
PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 4:47 pm 
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Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2011 9:43 am
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Not really had a chance to speak to her since last post, but things seem a little edgy since asking her for the coffee, no problem as I have other women I am interested in but am competitive so will still try to turn this one around when we get a chance to talk will do some rapport building but it will feel strange not bringing up why she never said anything directly to me. Women !


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PostPosted: Fri Nov 25, 2011 7:13 pm 
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Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2011 9:43 am
Posts: 13
Location: uk
Spoke to her again, she explained she gets loads of blokes every week hitting on her and she doesnt know who the wierdos are, I played a bit asking if she thinks I am a wierdo and she said no, she also said she was shy, I might see her tomorrow so I told her to try to see me when I come in and we could talk, I tried to empathise with her about the guys all hitting on her saying I had just realised it may be something like that, I now need to set myself apart from the "wierdos" I now need to be careful not to push too hard but need to build things up at the same time, I think a coffee at her work may be do-able, any tips guys?


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Nov 28, 2011 12:01 pm 
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Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2010 2:15 pm
Posts: 360
well firstly i wouldnt of asked her if you were a weirdo. because you're setting up an opportunity for her to qualify you by making her have high value which is not the idea on PU. you should be the one to validate and qualify her.

i dont think it is a good idea to have a coffee where she works because she can get easily distracted from one of her co-workers or her boss. you want her to have complete focus on you. so take her to another coffee shop near by.

try and set yourself apart by not doing what they do with your girl. you could ask her what these guys do to her and learn what not to do to her because she's already telling you her dislikes. as she is a shy person it wont be so smart to do too much push and pull but usuallu shy girl are more turned on by a high degree of emotional intimacy because they would relate to deep stuff more. but be alittle bit cheeky as well.

here are some notes about building rapport:

building rapport is a very interesting process. in order to build a great emotional connection one must choose to talk about things which have deep emotional content. it does not matter what the girl does or likes, you can connect with her even if you have dissimilar interests. as you know all occupations and hobbies are completely different in their complexity, principles and structure, but there is one thing which all of them have in common/share "EMOTIONS". one must be empathetic and show a girl that u understand why she chose to do that job or hobbie by expressing the emotions that one feels when doing that activity, it shows that you're really trying to get to know her, and she will think "wow this is a great guy to talk to, he's making an effort to understand me, but wait, i dont know anything about him" and this will compel her to ask you questions and u can freely express yourself how ever much u want as long as u express urself passionately and positively. all the men dont do this at all and do not understand how much empathy is a powerful force and openly allow themselves to be perceived to see a girl superficially. you can use the concept of 'rapport' to ur advantage as well.

in order for you to build greater rapport with her, get used to asking more open-ended questions e.g. "what have you been up to?" or "What did u get up to today?", my one: "What monkey business did u get up to today?". dont use questions like "wats up hun?", thats a closed-ended question which the girl would simply answer and she wont give u much material to work on in order to reach the hook point.

and connect on her answers in a positive way. dont be afraid to tease her as well. dont be afraid to create impact. when telling a girl about a situation that happened to u on that day or in the week, give more details about it, women love details. it is also good to read the local news paper, women are usually very aware what happens in the world, u should as well. u can get her point of view on something in the news (nothing to do with which celebrity had sex with who) e.g. political, environmental, sociological etc and then she would ask you what u think and you can manipulate the conversation which can lead anywhere u want.

another way u can have an "endless conversation" is the principle of "Question, statement, Question, statement, Q, S, Q, S etc". so u ask an open question, receive the answer, and then make a statement about the last thing she said in order to ask a deeper question. this process can go round in a circle, it can go on for ages.

hope that i have helped. happy gaming dude ;-)


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Nov 29, 2011 4:46 pm 
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Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2011 9:43 am
Posts: 13
Location: uk
thanks for that Mickey but I think she is a little wary about meeting up outside her work, by wierdos I think she was probably generalising meaning men that may not be her type, would building rapport talking about how her shyness affects her be good or is it best to keep away from that, it is strange as she covers up her shyness well, she is quick with come backs to some things I say which maybe her defence because she is shy. It is a challenge but fun too


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