Total Disinterest or Temporary?



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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 4:27 am 
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Saw a girl I haven't really hung out with much (she has a boyfriend now, I fucked things up some time ago). Went out to dinner with her, did some light kino (she seemed fine with it, did not seem uncomfortable, just not responsive). She called me an asshole (playfully) as dinner when I said she was starting to look 30 (she's 25) and asked the waitress if I was an asshole. Specified that I was her friend, specifically, to the waitress.

She brought up rejecting me (I didn't do it, had no intention of doing so) and she said something about how she had done it because we had "such similar flaws" or something like that. In reality, it was because I was really awkward around her (she had been actively and heavily flirting with me beforehand, and we've slept together before), and that she did it because we would have never worked out. I just assume this was all a "I'm trying to be nice and rejecting you" (even though, once again, no intention of getting with her).

She then, as I was saying good night, and I agreed with her rejection reason (was going to take it a step further and try to reject her too, but did not get the chance). She said "And also, I have a boyfriend, and he treats me well."


Was this total disinterest, or disinterest because she's attached? I don't intend on hitting on her anytime soon, though I think she thought that. We're moving to relatively the same area (and as far as I know, she is not bringing her boyfriend) and I'd like to reconnect in a few months, and just see if I can start afresh.


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 4:35 am 
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if you already had sex before, and she's still talking to you, she's probably open to having sex again :P


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 4:43 am 
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Eeeehhhhh.

I don't know. It's been a while (like 6 months), and I've acted awkward and weird around her. Though apparently she defended me to a former friend of mine who now hates me. She is happy in her relationship (the guy does treat her well, I have at least that much respect for him, even if he isn't really good for her long term [no ambition, much older than she is, still lives with parents]) though she doesn't intend to take him (at least, last she mentioned to me) when she moves.

She wants me to come to her Xmas party, which I will. Other than that I don't intend on contacting her until she moves. I'll be moving somewhere around (within 300 miles - exact location not important until the fall) of her (she's moving like 2500). Not doing that for her, it was originally planned before she was even moving (in fact, before I freaked her out the second time, she asked me to move with her). When I do that, I intend to visit her, take her on a road trip to her old college town, and just be very chill, and relaxed, and see if she might want me to stay a bit longer.

If not, no big deal.


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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 7:51 pm 
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Quote:
Saw a girl I haven't really hung out with much (she has a boyfriend now, I fucked things up some time ago). Went out to dinner with her, did some light kino (she seemed fine with it, did not seem uncomfortable, just not responsive). She called me an asshole (playfully) as dinner when I said she was starting to look 30 (she's 25) and asked the waitress if I was an asshole. Specified that I was her friend, specifically, to the waitress.

She brought up rejecting me (I didn't do it, had no intention of doing so) and she said something about how she had done it because we had "such similar flaws" or something like that. In reality, it was because I was really awkward around her (she had been actively and heavily flirting with me beforehand, and we've slept together before), and that she did it because we would have never worked out. I just assume this was all a "I'm trying to be nice and rejecting you" (even though, once again, no intention of getting with her).

She then, as I was saying good night, and I agreed with her rejection reason (was going to take it a step further and try to reject her too, but did not get the chance). She said "And also, I have a boyfriend, and he treats me well."


Was this total disinterest, or disinterest because she's attached? I don't intend on hitting on her anytime soon, though I think she thought that. We're moving to relatively the same area (and as far as I know, she is not bringing her boyfriend) and I'd like to reconnect in a few months, and just see if I can start afresh.
Sounds to me like shit-testing till certain extent when bringing the boyfriend situation. Why? Well, I don't know how good of friends you guys are, but why would she go on a date with a guy she's had sex with before while being in a relationship with someone else?

Just think about it...I don't see disinterest at all...

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 9:59 pm 
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We were basically bf/gf for 6 months, except I never actually asked her (she kept trying to get me to ask her for like 6 months. I was oblivious/scared). I competed for her affections against the other guy, but kept getting drunk and acting weird.

I don't know if she was shit testing or not. It seemed like a "He's too nice of a guy for me to break up with, just to see if we'd actually work out" statement, to me.


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