Hi guys,

I'd like to get a feedback on what happened with a girl that I've been dating. It's the second girl that I've been dating (thinking of a relationship) after starting to learn The Game. She's an HB9, teenager - so that explains a lot already but still, it'd be great to hear your thoughts on this:

We met at a festival at the very end of August. (I found out later that she really wanted to meet me - she was at a concert of my band earlier, and etc...). So we were hanging out together a bit at this festival but I didn't make a move there because I wasn't sure if I really want her. But we were flirting a lot and it was great fun.

Afterwards we were meeting - sometimes once, sometimes twice a week, but always with a group of friends. It was fun all the time, but whenever I wanted to set up a proper date - her sister and sister's bf would join us (I don't think it was because my target had told them to - it's just we always hang out together so why not...) , or my target once brought her best female friend along (when we arranged this meeting she told me that she'll bring along her hot friend, because she knows I'm looking for a gf - obviously she said that in a flirty way)

So at that meeting I did something I really regret. I was flirting with both of the girls (a bit more with the friend) so that my target never brings her along again (and indeed she wasn't too delighted with my behaviour). I know that that was an IOI, that she wanted to introduce her best friend to me, but at the same time I couldn't isolate her properly...

Now... apparently I overdid the flirting with the friend that day , because the next day she (the friend) started talking to me on msn and etc... So from that point on I was always trying to direct the conversation onto the topic of my target.

The next time I asked her out, she asked me if I want the friend to go with us, and I thought: ok I am the man and I'm gonna decide how this meeting is gonna look like. So I said no, and we met - just the two of us. The kino was going great and we were already hugging or holding hands, there was no good moment for a kiss though and I really didn't want to force it. Using routines is just not my style. I let everything happen naturally. But later we met her younger sister and my target wanted her to hang out with us from that moment on. But she was still teasing me so I just carried on with the escalation. But still - there was no good moment for a kiss.

I wanted to meet her again before leaving to university in other country for 2 months (that's where I am now) but I texted her too late and she really couldn't go because she promised her best friend that she'll go shopping with her to buy stuff for her birthday. She wanted me to come along with them, but the friend texted her that she doesn't want me to come along because she doesn't like me, and isn't willing to be listening to me ( !!!). Now I also proposed that I'd rearrange my other plans i.e. packing my stuff (which I know is a horrible mistake, but in that situation - I knew that either we're gonna meet before I leave or most likely I'm gonna lose) and she didn't respond to one of my texts eventually and I never wrote to her any more. I thought - ok it's her turn now to initiate a conversation. But she never did - it's been a month since then. (It was the end of September)

So I realise that I was very slow, but on the other hand - she was showing me IOI's all the time - not as many as at the festival, but still.. and she was not letting me meet her 1 to 1 and I wasn't realising at that time that it's possible to KC a girl without isolating if it's done properly. I know I've done some other mistakes but I don't think any of them was serious enough to make her lose all the attraction!

It's true that the frame was that I was chasing her, but it was always very flirty and funny, and she knew (because I demonstrated that once or twice) that I will just walk away if she tries to wrap me around her finger, or if she ignores me.

And I really have a strong suspicion that it's all because of this friend girl - who apparently liked me a bit too much - She might have told my target some false stuff about me or whatever - I'm not sure about this but can you see any other way to explain what happened? Usually I know why I screw up but this time it's very mysterious to me.

One of two things could've went wrong for you bro:

1. From your story, you played it very well up until the obstacle (her best friend). Judging from the story, you made it seem as if they were both the target. You should of isolated asap after you had her best friend's approval. Instead, you had to charm both of them because you did not isolate so the best friend ultimately started to like you (something you do not want if the obstacle's not the target). Work on being the AMOG and just say isolate bro, you already have her best friend's approval, act on it.

2. Just be straight up with the girl if gaming isn't your style. If you want the girl, chase after her. You have already built rapport with the target and had many IOI's, why bother trying to game her even more? Go tell the girl and be the man. By now you should not be afraid of rejection, so just tell her you want her. The longer you freeze her or drag it like you're better than her (in some cases you have to be), the sooner the next PUA/AFC will just game her. I may not really know your situation, but judging from the story, your target is seriously interested; you just need to act on it and not be a douchebag.

So bro, go chase your heart.

Thanks,

Hmmm I've never thought of just telling her but you're totally right - it would work!

But now the friend seems to be deadly offended - like she deleted me from facebook - I know it's all childish - she's a teenager. (And I did try apologising - even if it's not alpha - it's my nature) But most likely my target doesn't know why the friend doesn't like me, or it might be even worse - that the friend told her some false explaination - otherwise she would just normally write to me after a few days wouldn't she? So effectively I have her friend's disapproval.

And yeah I thought of contacting her when I go back home (which will be at the beginning of December) if no other nice girl appears here.

If she really is interested, she won't care about her best friend's approval, you already had it once. She's seen how good of a guy you are, move on from that.

I don't wanna sound like a wimp - asking 3 times if i REALLY should do this - but it's because I didn't expect this kind of advice.

I'm really not sure about this - I'm freezing her out because she messed up - she didn't respond to one of my texts. Now if I just start normally talking to her of out the blue after 1 month - it seems to me a total dlv, and a sign of being desperate.

If I just call her when I come back home, and ask her out, it's better - it's like giving a second chance. But from what you say, I infer that the earlier I do it, the better, but how to do it not to make it feel desperate?

You say "if she really is interested (...)" - if she really is interested it doesn't really matter what I say - she'll be all happy and stuff... But if she really is interested then why hasn't she written to me? Something is stopping her and that's why I'm not sure how I should make my next move.

Yeah, I understand where you're coming from. If she was interested in the first place she would be texting you back. In a lot cases revolving teenage girls, their friends tend to have a lot of influence on them. She could be suffering from girl code, "chicks before dickk". You're in a bit of a situation... I would honestly say it's a lost cause and it wouldn't hurt you anymore to just let her know EVERYTHING. From you wanting her to what you believe is stopping her and what your true intentions were. She could help you clear some damage done to the friend if she does like you. This is the scenario played out at best, not saying this is what you should expect to happen.

Thanks,

Yeah, that's pretty much what I thought. I guess I'll just do what you say, because I have nothing to lose - but when I come back to my country, because ...well obviously I won't say all that to her on msn!

To all of you guys who are reading this:
Don't use jealousy, or any other "unclean" tactics, because there's always someone who gets hurt by them, and this may screw up your whole situation so easily...

Generally time spent together without escalation diminishes a womans attraction to you, she stops romanticizing you and starts seeing you as a friend. You can get it back, but you've put yourself in a slightly awkward position. It probably wasn't anything you did that decreased her attraction towards you, more likely what you didn't do.

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Even the most naturally gifted can learn to become better.

Ask her to spend a day with you, DHV about how your life has been without her (all the positive things that has happened since you guys parted). Just make it seem as if she has left you in the best position because girls are built around emotions. Jealousy is one of them. Show her who's boss.

Thanks for all the respones,

I see that the opinions are mixed so I'll probably contact her when I come back, and see where it goes.

Hi again!

Ok... so it's a bit funny but we were all totally wrong. Here's what happened:

(I've come back to my country just 2 days ago)

2 weeks ago the friend messaged me on msn. "Hey what's up" etc etc. she was asking when I'm coming back, she wanted to talk on SPAM - I didn't want because I had some work to do that day (and also because I didn't want to give her any hope...) and we just chatted, joked a bit, just as if nothing had happened.

A few days ago the target messaged me on msn. It was quite funny - I won't be telling you all this, but basically she sent me something random and then said it wasn't meant to be sent to me - I was like: ok if you say so... - and a few mins later she said that ok the truth was that she wrote to find out what's up I had to go, but next day we chatted like usually - flitry and etc.

Today the friend messaged me and then made a conference with all 3 of us.

If any of you can make any sense of it - I'd totally appreciate that

(Yeah and obviously I'll probably meet her soon and make a move if the chemistry is right)

Amazing brah