about 3-4 months ago i gamed a spanish girl 9.5. In a small town, she's the coolest hottest girl here, totally open to sexual experiences, likes the same style, music, cloths, and we get on really great. She's up for open relationships and 3some's (although we havn't had one yet). We talk for hours. She told me a few times that i'm one of the sexiest guys she's ever met.

I don't have a huge amount of sexual experience, she does. I spent a lot of time researching sexual techniques. My problem was always that I came too quick, but by working out my pm muscles i could last much longer. Through practice, I had a multiple orgasm with her where i came, continued fucking here and came again without loosing my hard on. I can go down on her and give her a clit orgasm followed by a gspot orgasm, and then fuck her after this.

BUT here lyes the problem

About 3 weeks ago, we tried to have a quicky one morning and I couldn't get it up. It was the first time it ever happend me. So i put it down to already having 3 orgasm's the night before. Then, we were in a club one night, and she pulled me into the wheelchair bathroom to fuck. Again I couldn't get it up. We had a few more night of fucking but more and more consistently I couldn't get it up. Last night i couldn't get it up for the whole night. I gave her 5 orgasm's over the night but I didn't even have one myself. My dick just switched off. We're totally open about discussing it. I read the book Sex God Method. This explains that this problem is basically that you can't be anxious and get aroused at the same time and the solution is to relax and switch off your brain. But i was relaxed and still my dick was switched off. It just amazes me that this 9.5 girl that i like so much is on top of me grinding, and i can't for the life of me get it up... A totally crazy situation.

So now we're ending the whole thing because she thinks i'm not attracted to her and I'm not having any orgasm's.

Solutions without stupid comments please!!

Alrighty, let's break this one down....

Please answer some questions.
Do you ever have this problem on your own?
Do you still experience morning wood?
A slight indicator of age would be nice
Did you drink a lot? --> whiskey dick? or drugs of any sort?

If all of these indicate you are a healthy person with a healthy penis, the problem is most likely psychological. (If not then I believe there are exercises or something similar to cone exercises for women)

Would you say her experience is intimidating you?
Is there something else bothering you?
Do get distracted during sex?


Anyways, fix your problems, fix your dick

Hey Olivier,

So, answers to the questions:
I never had the problem on my own before. In the last few weeks, i have had it a few times. Last year, i gave up wanking for a month and I was horney as hell the whole time. I think my sex drive is gone down this year. I don't seem as interested as i used to be. That's probably because it's fucking up my head though. Last week i watched some porn and i couldn't have been more turned on.

Yes i experience morning wood, not every day but quite alot.

Age is 28

I don't drink much, one or 2 beers, I'm in good physical condition.

I would say her experience intimidated me a bit. She always had boyfriends and i know she's really sexual. Before this problem, I was working with an aim of pleasing her so much that she think's i'm the best guy she's ever been in bed with.

The thing that used to bother me was that i would come too quick. Now it's that i know that there's a huge chance that i won't get it up. Another thing is that she's got a really big sex drive and she can just have orgasm after orgasm. There seems to be no limitation.

Yes i get distracted during sex. I know i think alot. In the book 'Sex God Method', immersion is a big chapter where your brain should be switched off and you should be working off instincts. Easier said than done though.

Mainly a psychological problem it seems, a few simple suggestions but might work wonders....

Have sex when your mind is completely blank, for me it's a few hours after working out or in the morning.

If you are stressed out, just accept it. Stress only gets worse when you think oh crap I'm stressed, but if you realize hmmm my palms are sweaty, my heart is racing, mannnn I must be stressed out of my mind....such awareness usually does the trick for me.

Make sure your blood circulation is alright I think I've read it somewhere it's harder to keep it up when you are the one on your back.

If you think your problem is mainly due to the experience difference get something you get confidence from, heck it might even be something completely unrelated to sex. Beat her ass at pingpong, chess or whatever Get your confidence to the max!

If none of this work you could always see a doctor (that's what they are for) and he will either hand you a handful of pills (I highly suggest trying those out at your own first) or have some magical solution I completely overlooked. They gets these questions all the time, just no one likes to talk about it..... It's no really good fluff talk you see