My GF has feelings for another man, how do I make it stop?



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PostPosted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 5:45 am 
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My mind wasnt straight in my last topic, so now when my mind is made up, I ask you:

My GF has a crush on a friend of mine, he wont fuck her and she wont fuck him because of me, but this is destroying our relationship.

They talk a lot online, and she sees him when we go out together, sometimes they go out without me (but not alone).

She has feeling for him, but she is still in love with me. How do I make her forget about him?!


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 6:42 am 
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“If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they're yours; if they don't they never were.”

That's pretty much the quote my man, if she's interested in your friend, you may as well just let them discover each other. It's not fair on anyone to be in such an awkward situation, especially yourself (as shown by you posting this thread).

My man, this situation cannot be changed by your doings easily, (while in a mature and friendly manner) over the feelings towards your friend. It sucks bro but if you're holding everyone back by being with your girl while she might feel something for your mate, you're just holding everyone back. If she really loves you, she'll most likely come back to you.

Pce ~


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 7:57 am 
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..


Last edited by PUA-Paris on Tue Oct 25, 2011 1:49 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 9:47 am 
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Quote:
“If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they're yours; if they don't they never were.”

That's pretty much the quote my man, if she's interested in your friend, you may as well just let them discover each other. It's not fair on anyone to be in such an awkward situation, especially yourself (as shown by you posting this thread).

My man, this situation cannot be changed by your doings easily, (while in a mature and friendly manner) over the feelings towards your friend. It sucks bro but if you're holding everyone back by being with your girl while she might feel something for your mate, you're just holding everyone back. If she really loves you, she'll most likely come back to you.

Pce ~
good advice!

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 10:17 am 
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This is where I get harsh.
This might be hard to hear.
But I mean well.

If a girl has feelings for another guy and you have to ask others what to do... it means you aren't enough for her.
It means you cannot handle her.

You see, even if someone gave you stellar advice or an effective gambit... it'd mean you get to keep her by a cheat. Which in itself is fine, weren't it for the fact that you'll run into similar problems in the future.

You'll start pulling harder, She'll start rethinking the relationship even more.
It's going to hurt your butt.
-------
You aren't enough for her, yet. So tell her this.

"I can't handle you. Yet."

It's a powerful thing to say. It's flattering, honest, but most of all: It says you aren't the weak type. You're a guy with prospect.

Such a comment by itself will ensure that 'a part of her' has you on it.
(Don't go into explanations outside of "I'd like to grow some more."
------
Start doing what you did before meeting her. Go out and meet other women.
The idea of 'you' will start festering inside of her. She'll remember you differently. Adding grand ideas of how great you used to be.

You'll be wearing capes in her daydreams.

This new guy might be fucking her... but you'll be fucking her in the head. Lovingly, of course ;)

Anyway, that's what I did.
I've seen it been done a couple of times (less intentionally) by others.
It's the best advice I can give you.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 10:41 am 
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standard female psychology ...

this is how all woman are ..

they all have their self-interest and own codes .. they dump you for some other dick without hesitation

all tips i read from other guys is just pure manipulation .. do this and this to save the relationship blabla...

are you talking to other woman like she does with this guy ?

believe me it has nothing to do with love...

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 11:47 pm 
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Ok so I had a talk with my GF and I broke up with her and told her I dont want us to be friends and see each other any more.
She took it real hard, she said she loves me.
If she will come back to me after a while, how do I deal with the guy? I cant tell her no to talk to him anymore, they talk on the phone every day, what do I do if she DOES come back?


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 11:49 pm 
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Quote:
believe me it has nothing to do with love...
Believe me... 'love' and this willingness to drop a man to get with another... are intertwined so snugly, it's hard to see where one stops and the other begins.

Our definition of worth triggers feelings instantly. And yes, most of them are universal. All women have them.

So there's me agreeing, copying and tweaking your input.

Cheers gast.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 25, 2011 1:18 am 
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seriously?
you want a girl back that has 'feelings' with your so called 'friend'?

i think you should reevaluate your social circle because this guy was a real friend we wouldnt be doing this shit to you.

as for her if she is clearly interested in him and going out with him behind your back you need to get rid of her.

honestly. just dump her man.
please.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 25, 2011 10:59 am 
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set her up and put her on that show "Cheaters"

that will help your healing process

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2011 2:37 pm 
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Quote:
set her up and put her on that show "Cheaters"

that will help your healing process
Meh, I prefer good old Jerry!

Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

Man that dwarf on the show was the bomb


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2011 2:43 pm 
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To OP,

DeAngelo said it, attraction isn't a choice. Over the course of your relationship, your girlfriend will have attraction for a lot of other guys, just like you will have attraction for other HBs. This doesn't mean that they will make out (if they do, lose both the friend and the girl, you'll be better off).

There isn't much you can do to kill attraction. What you can do is create a stronger attraction with yourself. I won't go into much detail, lots of material on these forums, but start working on attraction (without trying to buy her, I mean no flower/gift/etc).

And if all else fails, I heard Mack 2.0 works as a hitman.

Cheers!


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2011 4:34 am 
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They are both disrespecting you dude! You should have planned to avoid these sorts of contingencies before this stage. Think about all the times you guys were hanging out together as mutual friends and all the times you let your guard down- that’s when they started building the bond between each other.

I admire your strength if you can let them be together and still be friends with them, but for that to happen you will have to go out and find a girl who thinks the world of YOU and not your mates.

Don’t feel cynical about all women after this. You just have to start again. I guarantee when you learn from your mistakes your next relationship will feel like destiny.

Cheer yourself up find some cool peeps to hangout with.

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you can fake it till you make it, but if it feels REAL go with the flow!


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2011 7:21 pm 
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Thank you all guys, your comments cheered me up a lot.

The matter has been solved, I have moved on and I actually feel great lately.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 27, 2011 7:44 pm 
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Good job! Time heals all wounds!

If this ever happens agian, hopefully never, you as a human being can tell the bitch she ain't allowed to see this person anymore and if she has a problem, then she can fuck off. You put yourself through some real big bullshit, not cool to yourself. Nobody is this whole situation cared about your feelings, not even you. I also would have told my "friend" to fuck himself.


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