Hey guys. I've noticed a big ass sticking point that I have.

So I can usually get a girl attracted, IOI's are there, and I qualify her.

My frame is quite strong in the first 5-7 minutes, but then it wavers massively. Why? Because I don't take this attraction anywhere, and the girl notices that I am now trying hard, or am needy. I have to think of stuff to say to continue the convo, instead of just having a natural conversation. And so...I remain in attraction phase for way too long, as I don't switch to building connection and comfort with her.

And I want her to feel very comfortable with me, to the point that I can move her around the venue or even bounce her.

How do you build comfort without looking like you're trying to build comfort? And how do you keep frame control over the girl? I know building commonalities is a big thing, but how do you actually do that? What I'm saying is, is that I want the girl to feel that "click" where she thinks "he and I sincerely get along. I understand him and he understands me...plus Im attracted!"

Thanks guys.

Bump anyone?

To get comfortable with someone, you gotta have those same interests or genuinely respect her perspective. Often people say something, and I actually find it very fascinating that someone can see it from that perspective. Then I increase my eye contact and compliment them on it. (don't exxagerate)

I think being really comfortable with someone is when you're together and the (awkward) silence that occurs isn't so awkward anymore.
That's usually achieved when an awkward silence can't even be reached.

I know it sounds contradictive, but eventually everyone has an awkward silence with that other person.