May i have your advice on how to act best in a situation like this?

There is this girl that has been my friend for so long. Recently, we got really close and kissed at a party. We both want to have a relationship.
However, she has been together with another guy for 1 year who lives abroad. Their relationship is kind of over.
Girl tells me stuff like this:

• "I like my ex boyfriend." (She used the term "love" but in a friendly manner)

• "My ex boyfriend will visit the town in a month and i must talk to him and tell him that it's over."

• "You and i should take things slow until i get over certain emotional things first. We shouldn't have sex too quick."

• "Things will get okay between you and me once i talk with my ex"

Am i being fooled here? How should i act to demonstrate value and win her at the same time?

Tell her to come back and see you when she is done with the ex. Could she not tell him it's over via phone?

Sorry dude... just wouldn't put up with that.

She is behaving like a junkie, if she sees her boyfriend, they are going to do something... she is being all inocent and naive, but is only act.

You were the guy she "hopes" to love...

The ex is the idiot she loves...

And all that crappy lets take it slowly, I really doubt she will be taking slowy with her ex when she sees, but i might be wrong.

Advice Be cool dont show any insecurities.

games like that make me want to dial 1-800-smackabitch

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

I think your avatar makes this extra funny. Everytime I see anything by you I read it in my head with a Lil Jon voice.

I have nothing to add to this thread lol. Sorry.

Oh wait.....yeah I think girl is a lost cause. Quote me on this, in a month when her boyfriend comes back, they will magically re-kindle the relationship! Leaving you high and dry without pussy for another 4 months! Enjoy.

James Bond would not put up with this shit.

Q: "How should i act to demonstrate value and win her at the same time?"

A: Sleep with other attractive women. This girl is not taking you seriously. By sleeping with other women, you will be able to re-approach the situation from a position of abundance. I mean, seriously, why should you have to wait for her to get her crap straightened out? You are a quality guy with options (i.e. you've found these forums).. guys with options don't wait on girls for weeks in order to have sex.

-Wolf

It's hard to tell. I do agree with most points here, but on the other hand maybe the girl doesn't want to turn out a slut and cheat on her BF with you. If she actually sees you as LTR material she won't put out easily and she certainly doesn't want to look like a cheating slut in front of you. So if you end up in bed you have to take the guilt and ASD away.
In any case, let her know you're not the kind of guy who she can manipulate. Step back a little, don't show you're angry or confused, just step back, be less available, yes game other women. Still act cocky and funny and seductive with her, escalate normally and if she puts the brakes on, freeze her out for a bit. Just don't act like you're waiting for her. Good luck!

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rAFC and yes, I'm a chick.

I have bursts of being a lady, but it doesn't last long.

bwahahaha

you paraphrased the word "love" out and inserted "like".

lol, wtf

i can't take this topic seriously after reading that.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

shes not over her ex, stay away, at least say let me know when your ready to take things to the next level

this...
if she said love its kinda important dude.

she isnt over her ex, you have to get over it.

to show value and have a chance you have to act like you dont care. give her all the time she needs, be flirty and sexual but make sure she realises you dont need anything from her. even if she wasnt still kinda with her ex she probably would not be ready for something with you. give her time and space, unless you really like the girl its almost certainly much better to just move on.

Thanks a lot! Yesterday, I tried to be calm and cool when i talked to her, mostly inspired from The White Knight and Snake Dr.'s advices. And I had sex with her!


Ok, it was the worst sex ever. She told me she never gets wet, she doesn't like foreplay, she never had orgasm by another guy. I felt like fu.king a sandbag. But i think i got her now, she texts me often with a lot of smileys and kisses.

This is how it happened:

I was at her place and she asked me to massage her back. In the heat of the massage, i placed some kissed on her neck and back. She pushed me back reminded me that -it is not the right time-. Then, i said to her to get over her past relationship and come back to me later on and we can have a healthy start. She was kind of shocked. She looked into my eyes and told me (with teary eyes, wtf) "Are'nt we going to see each other now?". I said "we won't see each other cause i see sex as one of the key elements of a healthy relationship and all i want is to have a healthy relationship with you." I made a move to stand, she pulled me to bed...

hhh'wut? hhh'wut? yyyeaahh! ohhhkaaay!!!

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

...and why, exactly, are you excited about bagging this sand bag?

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- Lux et Veritas -

maybe she wants to be smacked around

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Congrats mate, you did a great job there!!

Others give you a hard time here, but you got what you wanted, you are the man!

First times with a new girl can suck sometimes, practice makes perfect!!