| Here is a little method I thought of for people to get over their AA. I feel like people need to feel a little more comfortable when approaching people, let alone women. Sometimes it's best to have a purpose for talking to people to get over our AA. That's the best starting point at least. Because i've noticed that it feels awkward for some people to just say "Hi" to a person, let alone ask them an opinion question. Hopefully this method will make people feel a little more "at home" since it is something most of us have asked strangers before. No one really thinks about it much and it's no big deal.
We think sooooo much about the game, so much about our fears that we cloud out everything else. We really need to start following the 3 second rule because that makes things A LOT easier. But when you're out there knowing that your purpose is sarging and picking up women, it will be the only thing in your head. Your expectations will be high and you'll feel depressed if you don't get up to par or accomplish what you set out to do. So when you're next to that HB and it gets to the 4th second you start to over think things. Then you chicken out you no longer feel comfortable anymore. Does that sound like you? Here are a few steps to cure yourself of AA:
Step 1: Set NO goals except for the one listed in step 2. You need to go out there without expectations. "If you expect too much, you will only find yourself disappointed. When you drop your expectations, it makes every moment special" (You'll feel accomplished, more comfortable, more confident and you'll be proud that you're getting over your AA)
Step 2: Here's what I want you guys to do. Ask a random person what time it is. It doesn't matter where you are, at any part of the day you should just go out there and ask someone what time it is. If you can do 2-3 people a day, it's a great start. don't kill yourself over anything else... there's no rush. If you can do 4-5 people a day... even better. If you seriously can't ask ONE person for the time, I honestly don't know how you're going to get yourself over AA =/. I know that i'd be hating myself if I was right next to an HB and couldn't give myself the courage to talk to her at all. I could at least ask her a simple question. Just follow the 3 second rule, try not to think of anything at all and just ask:
PUA: "Excuse me, Do you know what time it is?"
HB/Random Person: "It's 4:54."
PUA: "Ok, Thanks..."
It's that simple. After a month or so you may have talked to at least 100 people right? You can open a 5 set by asking the time, it's no big deal because you're expected to leave almost instantly after someone gives it to you. I'll bet that during those 100 people, you'll find yourself having small talk with some of those people, maybe they'll extend the topic, maybe you'll think of something else to say. Don't worry too much about it... drop your expectations for now.
Step 3: Hopefully you've approached 20 people in a week, even if it's just that one question. By the 20th person you should try one of these things:
1. Trying a new opener
2. Use a false time constraint and ask another question. For example:
PUA: "one more question, it'll only take a second because i'm late to meet my friends, but what do you think is a more exciting genre of movies, horror or comedy?"
Along with the false time constraint you should also give a reason for asking at some point (preferably earlier on).
PUA: "The reason why I'm asking is because i'm meeting my friends to watch a movie and we're not sure what to watch".
You can then talk about movies, about her favorite genre of movies, or books... maybe subjects in school, etc... you need to lead the conversation!
3. You can comment on a piece of clothing, or an interesting accessory she is wearing. You can neg her on it or compliment her, remember not to think too much about it, just do it to get over your AA... you can think more about the game when you're ready. keep your expectations low...
4. You can even try something like "Hey, you look familiar, did we go to the same high school?" or "Aren't you blah blah blah's friend, you look familiar". (if you use a common name like John, Janice, Rebecca, or Brian you'll probably be asked Brian who? Then you can just talk a little more about your friend and maybe DHV yourself and find out it's the wrong person... because they obviously don't know your friend)
Anything you do to extend the conversation will help a lot. You'll find out there is truly nothing to be scared of because you've talked to so many people and most likely 99% of them will be friendly. By every 20th person you should try making small talk with at least one person. If you can do it early on, maybe by the 15th or 16th person, great... if not, it's still no big deal. Remember have NO EXPECTATIONS and the key is to TRY. If you're out there doing something as simple as asking for the time.. eventually your AA will disappear and you will be following the 3 second rule very easily and confidently. then you can move on to more advanced PUA skills such as real/situational openers, working on DHV stories, routines, etc...
An example of extending the conversation:
PUA: Excuse me, Do you know what time it is?
HB/Random Person: It's 6:45.
PUA: This may sound odd, but can I ask you if you rounded that off? Like is it exactly 6:45 or was it actually 6:43, 6:44 or something. There's a reason I'm asking, I promise...
HB/Random Person: It's exact.
PUA: Oh, I see. Yea, because I've noticed that if I ever ask my friends for the time for some reason the girls always give me the exact time, and the guys will sometimes be way off. they'll round off 7:52 to 8 o clock sometimes haha.
HB/Random Person: *laughs*
PUA: Either my friends are all idiots, or there's some weird phenomenon behind all of this. Hmmmm.... I have a theory, maybe the guys are just trying to end the conversation as soon as possible? Maybe they find it as irrelevant conversation, so they try to end that subject as soon as possible. That way they can go back to talking about sex or sports again haha.
HB/Random Person: *laughs*
PUA: Do you think guys naturally lie more? or do you think women are just naturally more social?
HB/Random Person: *answers question*
If you can extend the conversation that shows that you're getting better, the key is to get over AA, i'm not trying to give you new openers to use because you should think of them on your own... get away from canned material... it'll make you more social, more fun and an actual INDIVIDUAL (not some fake PUA robot who can't think for himself)
Some other possible topics to branch out of if you want:
1.How most likely 9 out of every 10 people around the room probably have cell phones. So it's more and more uncommon for us to get asked the time, isn't that weird?
2.(if they check their phone) Wow that's an interesting cell phone, I noticed it has a camera. Isn't it crazy how much technology is changing. We're basically on our way to having a super computer right in our pocket. As if wanting a camera, cell phone, mp3 player, and AIM all in one place wasn't enough... blah blah blah
3. Hey, that's an interesting sweater/necklace/bracelet. I think I just saw someone else wearing it outside, is that your sister or something? (neg which you can then say it's probably just a very popular item or something)
Hopefully this can help some of you guys get over AA. Just remember you don't want to waste 4-5 months without getting over your AA =/. I mean it may always be there but we need to get at least a little more comfortable with it, right? If you constantly put it off/procrastinate you may find yourself constantly reading field reports, reading books, watching workshops without approaching a single set... do you really want to be THAT guy? It's MUCH more different when we're actually out there trying these things out. We need to be out there motivating each other but more importantly ourselves. The only true person who can make things happen is ourself anyway, so you need to get out there and make things happen. 28,000 days to live... every day counts. _________________ by Casual (Age 20, Upcoming PUA)
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