Wudup players! Bitch is on the keyboard, so get ready to read a very long and pointless introduction about.... wait, I don't have to do that! Every time I want to write a post, I feel like I have to write without reaching no whatsoever kind of goal, but I just realized I didn't had to. I am free. We are all free to do what we want, when we want it!!! Freedom my brothers! The sky is the limit! You can fly on your own, my dear friend!!! WOOOOOOOOW! I just totally realized this shit, and now I'm super happy and excited about it. Lulz face.

Aight, so yesterday night I went sarging with Dunkmeister and Duffman, and we practiced our winging skills. Twas sick! Duff actually got his first k-close! CHEERS BRO!

Anyway, too lazy to write a field report, had 2 num-close and one k-close, pretty good for a night in a very small bar (duh, can't get into big clubs before I'm 18...) Anyway, I found out accidentally a very dumb game that creates a SHIT load of attraction. In french, we call it ''je te tiens par la barbichette'', can't translate it tho.. :O Basically, you just hold your target's chin, and call something like this:

I hold you
You hold me
By our little goatee.
The first one
Of us two
Who will laugh
Will get a wee slap!

But it rhymes in french...
Anyway, if you created enough attraction beforehand you can stare into her eyes for a VERY long time, just saying NUFFIN' AT AWLL!! Then, when you're tired, you just tell her:

(with an intriguing smile) : Aight, this never is going to end, let's call it an even...

Then she laughs or grin (usually... duh)

So you slap her (don't be a freak and hurt her, lulz)

*Optional part : you bury her dead body since you forgot you were holding a super sharp dagger while playing the game.*

Oh, and since I'm too lazy to write a FR, I'll just log my Bitch record of that night:

My second num-close believed me when I said I was a stripper -(can you say this in english, like a stripper, but a man??)- and she paid me tequila shots in exchange of me just basically going caveman with her, and even more than caveman. I actually rubbed my ass on her tits for a good 15 seconds while she was sitting, in front of her friends. I adored it. I am a Real_Bitch Oh, and she was engaged. LULZFACE

Peace my friends!

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Giving a fuck is the first step towards deception.

First off, let me just start by saying, your intros are shit buddy, I hope someday you wake up and realize how not cool they are and how ... oh fuck it I actually love your intros bro.

Anyways, the point here is, like Mystery said, anything that involve childish games is actually good and that's a game I was playing when I was 5. Plus the thing is it involves somewhat Kino as you have to grab the girls chin (sounds somewhat retarded but lets get back on track here).

Like he said, dont actually hit her hard and go banana on her, I dont know for you guys but from where Im from its not well seen to hit a chick. God I get sidetracked easily.

On that note, I just wanted to make Bitch look somewhat good by confirming his methods were working and blahblahblah .... but seriously its a very good game and if you can use it do it, works out great.

Goodnite to everyone in the whole wide world !!!

No way I'm using that game.

Sounds like a good night though, and childish games are great. Im sure that one gives you a lot of success, especially if they already knew it.

I'll sometimes lock eye contact with a girl and see how long she holds it. They almost always give up within ten seconds unless they're ready for a kiss.

Oh, and almost forgot, thousand thumbs up for Dunkmeister's amazing closes and wingman skills. He also is the sexiest dude in green morphsuit (yes, seems like our nights are never over before he does the green man lol)

You should all like Quebec City's Green Man on Facebook (hell yah, thats some ad placement right there, sorry mods )

Will finish with a word for the wise : Bronies before Hoenies (know your memes, internet folks!)

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Giving a fuck is the first step towards deception.