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impress her by making her feel good, making her laugh, taking interest in her life. not by talking about yourself and making pointless jokes or comments. like i said make it about her.
I always thought it was best to strive for a balance but at the same time to go with the flow of the conversation. I am not saying not to ask her about her self, but you also don't want to interview her as well. As far as making pointless jokes/comments goes I find such things to be part of the "dance". Not saying I use it all the time, but I find humor and chit chat works quite well online as good online game is brief and short so that you can meet in person as that is the goal right?
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i know the pua stuff says to have the mind set of not impressing her, but that would just be denial, and make you a shifty validation seeking wuss. it's to have the confidence to know you can make her feel good no matter what it makes you look like. of course you want to impress her. that's why you're here. duh. it's a primitive drive to want to have people like you. it will never go away.
You are right we want people to accept us in general. Tho I found trying to impress people tends to not work, yes we naturally want to but there is a difference of doing it naturally verses doing it naturally and letting people see who we are.
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you don't want it to. psh "have a i don't give a shit attitude" b.s. what a great way to fill you with anxiety and make an unconfident, unsocial, bitch.
I don't think you get what that means. Such an attitude it more dealing with people that care more of how others view them. You talk about how we want others to like us and what have you well there are those that very much care of how others like us and how they view us a bit too much you can say. This view/attitude is more to deal with that as not everyone is going to like you that is a fact. Your not going to win over every girl which is why I very much question your 90% success rate. Besides the more you care about what others think of you the less of a backbone you will have and the more you want to "serve" others so that they will like you. Not giving a shit does the opposite as long as you don't take it too far.
Yes okay, i understand a lot of what you are saying and i guess i do that to. my point is to take interest, you can never show to much interest. that's what i mean by it being about her. yeah don't impress her by making talking about yourself or showing off is true. don't make it about you.
But it's the whole don't give a shit thing. i mean it's not that i don't give a shit it's just that i'm confident that i'm deserving of her and that makes me confident that i'm able to show as much interest as i want, i don't feel like i need to do things to make myself look good, but i enjoy doing things that make her feel good. so that's why i don't believe in not giving a shit, i think these self help gurus are giving a lot of people the wrong impression, by accident or on purpose. yeah it's easy to look at someone successful and say "he doesn't give a shit" but he does. he put a lot of effort into it, got familiar with it, and now has the confidence to know what he's doing. he still gives a shit, it's just that he knows what hes doing so he doesn't look worried.