Hey guys. If you need a quick answer (since I'm on the forum more than most), ask me here. I don't mean quick as in two words, lol, but quick as in time frame. I'm not ALWAYS on here, but I am more than most.

Anyway, I'm not a mPUA, but I will do the best I can to help you. If I can't answer, I will try to contact MY contacts, lol.

Please, don't go on and on and on and on and on with your question, but get to the point. But, at the same time, do give me all the info that would be helpful for me to answer you better.

How do you # close a customer at your work (I am a manager at a grocery store)? I get IOIs from a quite a few customers that come in. I haven't figured out an easy way to go about it. They are attracted to me and interested in me, but because I am at work it is difficult to find a plan of attack in bringing up hanging out.

If you can figure this one out that would be awesome.

Are you around, in view of, your staff?

In general, I'd say do things like making eye contact with the customer, then either motion with your head or with your finger for her to lean her head in, as if you're telling her a secret. Then, compliment something about her, NOT HER LOOKS though. If she gives you more IOI's, which she more than likely will, get her to lean in again and let her know you can't talk right now, because obviously you're at work, but that you'd like to talk to her later.

Of course, what really makes a big difference is whether or not you have your staff watching you. So, fill me in on that.

Last night I went the local Elks Club because they have Salsa dancing on weekends. Anyway Salsa is tonight, but I stay, have a beer and I see this HB8(.5). In Missoula most girls aren't much better but whatever. She has on a short white shirt over a clashy black/aquamarine/white spaghetti strap number. I neg her that it looks 80's blah blah blah, I get to a point that I ask if tips go up when the white shirt comes off. As I am walking out the door I smile and say "Maybe if you were a better bartender, you wouldn't need to rely on your looks for better tips (wink)" As I am walking out the door her gay friend made some comment about me never coming back. I was trying to be half-joking, half-flirting. I am going back to apologize because I feel I may have come off as insulting. If not for Salsa I would not care, but, I since I am going back there I am going to be a man a about it and, depending on how she acts, I will apologize because I don't want women to see me as a dick. I guess I don't know how far to go before a girl sees you as annoying, piggish or both. I would like some feedback. Also, Is apologizing the right thing to do?

In THIS case I'd say yes, apologizing is the right thing to do.

So, the 8(.5) is the bartender then?

With negging you have to watch yourself. There is a fine line between negging and insulting, and if you're not careful it IS easy to step over the line. I've done it myself before.

Basically, the rule of thumb is for an 8, neg maybe once, twice at the most. For a 9 or 10, you can get away with twice. Also, for a 10, you can get away with 3, because the hotter the girl THINKS she is, the more negs it will automatically take to basically bring her down a few notches. But usually, 3 would be a limit anyway, for a really hot girl. You have to realize also that if you say it wrong, it's not a "backhanded compliment" which is what a neg is, but rather something that is offending. If you hit her self-esteem too hard like that, it's gonna easily backfire, which is sounds like this one has done.

Here's a question Tripp, however I don't know how relevant it is now. When I apologize should still act confident so that I don't D so much LV? Rye Lee came down hard, perhaps rightly so, and made me want to apologize all hang-dog like. He said I should even tip her big. I don't know about that because that might betray how confident I really am. I must say, that when I was sarging it felt great. She was in a rush to set up the bar and I know that I had to get her attention. I did, but it could have been done better.

The fact is, you've already lowered your value, otherwise you wouldn't need to apologize to begin with. Being confident is good, but there is a difference between confidence and arrogance too. And arrogance is not a good thing.

It wouldn't hurt to tip her well. Mainly you need to let her know that you are sincere. If you can show her your sincere, that should do the job. Otherwise, you may need to resort to groveling, but if that's the case, you've probably already blown any chances you have with this girl.

I don't think I need to grovel. I figured out last night as I was walking back to school that sincerity is the key. Thanks a bunch.

My reason for saying to give a $5 bill is to show that you know you fucked up and you want to demonstrate that you can show civility. It is sorta grovelling yes, but at this point I think you've blown any chance with this girl, you were basically warned not to come back to her club. I would instead use her as social proof, by admitting you acted wrongly, but you're mature enough to appologize and want to get on her good side so that you can be friends. Being friends with the bartender is great social proof, so I think that's the best outcome from this situation.

Also, I personally neg a decent bit, regardless of looks, but I do it really playfully, so they feel good about themselves because I'm saying things they know I don't really think. I like to tell a girl she looks terrible, or that something is wrong with her outfit, while obviously checking her out, with lustful eyes. She hears me tell her she's bad looking, but she sees me undressing her and doing all sorts of bad things to her in my eyes, so she feels like I've dominated her, so I DLVed her, while still making her enjoy it. I'll have to make a post on advanced forms of negs.

Now I'll stay out of your thread

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

That's right! Damnit! lol

And, for the record, in that situation, I don't think $5 is a major thing. It's a decent tip.

Well I don't have to be in constant view of my staff but I do have to continually check up on them. I have done a lot of things, since I am what I have been told a bit more witty/charming then most, I do compliment a lot of these girls but more in a sarcastic way.

It is hard to explain, but I immediately control the situation if I compliment the girl. I have them blushing, and playing child/innocent like into my hands a lot of times.

The other problem is I do talk to a lot of these girls. I do have time to talk to them. During certain hours of the day i am required to be up front standing and doing virtually nothing for 4 hrs. I just kind of wander around the registers, I am suppose to be talking to customers and helping them find things. Talking to them is part of my job.

I have everything to the point where I don't need to micro manage. I just kind of stand to the side and step in when needed. I have taught most of my staff to be responsible enough that every decision doesn't rely on me.

A lot of my staff is actually more like co-workers then staff, they are in some cases my friend and very supportive. I am visible to the staff sometimes in front conversating, and they don't watch, kinda mind their own.

I just haven't found a well designed way to snag a number and say lets hang out later. Most of it has something to do with the fact that it is my work, and although I am interested, I do not want them to feel uncomfortable shopping there. I talk to about 5 that I would love to hang out with. I just haven't found a situation I was comfortable with # closing. I mean obviously there is a few out there I would love to talk to that I haven't but it is difficult to talk to a customer out of the blue at some moments.

Ok, so if I'm understanding you correctly, the sticking point is that you are afraid that by you asking for their number, you will make them feel too uncomfortable to come back and shop there. Is this right?

Dear Tripp,

I want to high five the cute girl at the local Subways sandwich shop. Problem is, she has on those plastic sanitary gloves. And I do like my sandwiches clean and germ free. Suggestions?

Signed,
Yours Truly,
The-Next-sPUA,
Road2Alpha (I'd like to change my tag sometime, PM if that's not possible and I have to create a new account and pretend I don't know you.)

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afc-challenge-to-the-masters-social-anx ... 10108.html

LOL. Sure. I love to eat at Subway myself. Just pick a time when she's not busy, not customers waiting for her. Then motion her to come closer with your finger. When she does, say, "do me a 'quick' favor." She'll most likely say, "ok." Then say, "take your glove off real quick." When she does you put your hand up and tell her to high five you. That will catch her attention. She'll most likely think you're interesting and DIFFERENT, which are both good things. Considering most guys would never do something like that in a Subway. Hell, if she runs the register, she's supposed to have her gloves off then anyway.

If you're serious about changing your tag, it's no problem.

Tripp, I have a question sir.


Okay, a few months ago I got this girl's number. On the scale a 7.6, and we talked a on the phone a few times, but our schedules just never meshed. Eventually I stopped calling her, and I let the attraction fizzle out.

I see her today, and the attraction is still there, and her ranking has increased a bit to an 8.0. She came around and instantly made that I want you eye contact with me, but I didn't ask for her number again, although it's still in my phone. BTW, I still want to bed this girl.

How do I come off as I guy who just didn't delete her number, as opposed to a guy who may have been saving her number in the hopes of seeing her again?

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i lust for jessica alba, but now since she is preggers. I am lusting for Nicole!!! It's New Year's Day. It was Ben Franklin who said, "Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man."