Ok guys how should this be handled...

I was away on holiday for 10 days and everything was fine. Was with my gf the night before I left and everything. Tonight I was meant to be meeting her for the first time since I got back. I've noticed that in the three days that I got back, her texting has been decreased towards me and today she canceled tonight's date saying;

"Alan do you mind if we meet up sun or Mon?? My exs granda had two heart attacks in the last 3 days he's in. Hospital and they are turning his machine off tomorrow so id like to get down to see him tonight xxx"

Ok I'm sure that this is a completely valid excuse so I'm not worried about that.

What does worry me is the fact that I know her ex still loves her and says that "she's the one that got away"! She told me a while ago that she is over him and that he "fucked up". However they were going out for three years so she will have some residual feelings towards him.

I'm worried that this guy will be able to use this as some sort of springboard towards the two of them rekindling their old feelings.


Further background info... He is part of their social group so she will see him regularly. We have been going out 2 months. They broke up about 6 months ago.




How the fuck do I handle this?

Alright dude
Unfortunately there is only one way you can handle it.. and that's to be the bigger man. I know it's not the ideal situation, my ex was best friends with her ex, but there's really nothing you can do about it, especially two months into the relationship! You have no claim over her for the time being.
Obviously, if this continues to happen, then express your annoyance. You're not there to be her entertainment! But tell her she can make it up to you, and go about your business.
Be the bigger man, don't let it bother you, and throw yourself into other things/friends/even women. I personally find it's always good to have some hot women around who are interested in you, it makes her the one being jealous, and gives you options should you end up breaking up with this girl.

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"there is no ordinary life Wyatt, there's just life" Doc Holliday!

Yea I guessed that should be the approach. I've got other women interested but me and my gf don't share social circles so it would be hard for her to notice.

How should I play the texting/calling until Sunday (we have rearranged for Sunday)??

Should I give her space or should I be supportive? If it's the supportive one what should I say that doesn't come across as afc?

"I understand. Do what you need to do, and give me a call when you have some free time."

Then drop it. Do not follow up. She'll get back to you when she has the time.

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- Lux et Veritas -

Forgive me if this comes off a mean but this is some shit you should not deal with man. I played the bigger man before and it is a game you will continue to play. If you are going to do it now you will continue to deal with this. This is a girls game. I relized it was to much far to late when, while in labor, the woman having my child was talking about how her ex was getting married.

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Want to learn how to talk to a woman. Go out in the woods and pet a wild animal, if you come back with both of your hands, you're in.

Would you really WANT a woman that wasn't caring enough to be there for people when they need her?. I would take it as a HUGE red flag if she did otherwise. Your problem of course is wether shes over him or not, but if so wouldn't you want to know about it now instead of later?
Can you get screwed over? Yes, but such is life and better to take a chance with that then deal with a heartless person that's not going to be there for you during the hard times.

It sounds to me like a valid excuse. If you act bitchy against her seeing the ex, then she will think that you are an unsupportive dumbass and the ex will gain more sympathy. However, if she continues cancelling dates with you and giving more time to the ex instead, I would draw the line.

And always beware of ex's playing the "guy in despair" to manipulate her. We had a huge argument with my girl being too close and in frequent contact with one of her ex's. Luckily, I drew the line and she promised me not to initiate or allow contact with him. Right after this, the ex called her out of nowhere and as a coincidence, he had an accident at that time! My girl being the caring and sensitive girl had to call him back two days after to see how he has been and now he's trying to use it as a way to rekindle their old connection.

My conclusion is, trust her and her caring personality but don't play the cool guy when you see something that disturbs you.

Ask yourself...Do I feel like shit when I hear she's going to see her ex? If the answer is yes and you feel it in your stomach, I mean that instant twinge in your gut. Forget her buddy, NEVER go against your first instincts, I have done so on countless occassions, and you know what. Instinct never lies, it's older than though itself and it's lasted in our confused little human bodies all that time for a very good reason. If it doesn't feel right to you, trust yourself, don't put yourself through it. Yes maybe she's a genuinly sweet and caring girl, but at the end of the day, why should you have to put up with that shit when you know fine well what the ex's intentions are.

I'm yet to meet a male/female partnership that exists purely on a friends only basis particularly if there was previous history between them.

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Be the FIRST to sell shovels during a Gold Rush---!___!

Don't text her at all after that sort of thing. Let her decide how she wants to proceed. If she really wants you and cares about you more than her ex, she'll chase you, apologizing for canceling and reschedule. If she doesn't text you back, hit on someone else. She can decide whether or not she wants your time, but you shouldn't have to force it on her.

They will end up having sex. No doubt about it. She's going over to stay with her ex. need I say more.

Oooh yeah if she's spending the night with him or in the area, they probably will. Emotions will be all over the place. Dump her? I'm not sure how to proceed without proof that they got together.

This is a joke, right? She is still friends with her ex, whose grandfather is going to die by being pulled off life support. How you guys automatically assume the two are related is beyond me.

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- Lux et Veritas -

Kind of half a joke? He should be cautious. I wouldn't trust most girls in that situation, but also I personally wouldn't be that bothered if she did get with her ex.

I'd first ask whether they hooked up. She'll probably respond no. Then I'd ask if there are still feelings there. If she says yes, and she might, they hooked up. If she says no, then trust her answer.

My ex talked a lot with her ex when we were dating. Most of the times it's just to make a man jealous. Real men just aren't jealous because it's a sign of fear.

Just care less about it. If a girl's gonna cheat it's most likely because her BF's being jealous and possessive. Don't be that guy.

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Go.

Give her a big ol smooch when she gets back, kiss them crusty lips reeking of semen and dick. Come on maaaan, you're smarter than all of this. And whoever is above me that wrote that silliness, so I guess a woman wouldn't just wanna fuck another guy for the thrill like us guys? Naivety is adorable

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A Tru nigga