Smart girl..

She's onto you dude.. She'll probably come around, but tell me seriously.

If you knew that having sex with her, and then dumping her or treating her like 'Vanna White when nobody gets a letter' would break her heart in two would you give a shyt? Or would it just be payback for all the chicks that have stiffed you?

If not then I'd say she's probably better off not getting any. And she knows it.

That's the bottom line from her perspective.

If you hang in there, no doubt at some point you'll get some if you can convince her she's just not your latest piece of meat.

I never blame a girl, especially a young one for being careful about her feelings, her social rep or about the long term health of her body. And having random, multiple sexual partners isn't conducive to either.

The question then becomes, what kind of woman do you want? Top of the food chain, or just easy? Take your pick.

For too many guys, and PUA in particular it's just an ego thing. A notch on their belt.

Like I've said before, nothing inherently wrong with being in the PUA community to help you learn the skills to acquire sex. I think when it crosses the line into selfishness and manipulation with no regard for the other person involved is when it becomes a problem, and even an ethical issue.

Not saying that's the case with you. Just saying some chicks are onto it. And rightfully so. And it makes it hard for the rest of us who become guilty of just being a dog looking to bury the bone until being proven innocent.

Alot of damaged women out here. That wanted to help you out and do the right thing. And alot of guys that do their thinking only with what's hanging between their legs.

I think Meatloaf put this conundrum best, at the 4:00 minute mark.

[youtube]http://youtube.com/watch?v=j0ns8t9iQck[/youtube]

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L.A.- I am C&F and confident. people just say i am an asshole because i almost always have a comment or i play/joke around. I have never crossed the line. I see that with my friends. I am slowly getting rid of the bad ones. The one who used the code around her, i never talk to anymore. I just have a couple more left to get rid of or straighten out. I want to be a Pua, but i am not that involved in the community. I am developing it though.

Starbuck- I hear exactly what you are saying. To answer your question, i would feel pretty bad. One of my biggest things is not to harm another person. I care for her enough that i don't want to see her upset. I gotta work on my issues with commitment though. I know this is gonna come down to an exclusive thing, and i can work with that (it would be a good thing). I can hang in there, that isn't a problem. Sex isn't that big of a deal to me (iv'e gone this long without it). I am so happy she is careful like this. Atleast i know that she takes pride in herself. I like the girls that are at the top. If it was about the easy ones, i wouldn't have even posted on here.

Update: there is a new development in this story. She wants to go out this weekend. I was thinking about having a party. She is coming to it, but she knows what situation she is gonna be in when she comes. She is gonna spend the night, and she is gonna be in bed with me. How do i handle this? Do i go in again, or do i just build tension and see what she does? What do you guys think i should do in the days leading up to this?

I'd just build tension, work on it again and see how she wants to handle it this time. Could be a mood or hormone thing. Without volunteering anything about long term interest.

You could try the honesty route (you just want to bang her), but it's doubtful she's going to go for it without some sort of heavy reassurance on your part. And it doesn't sound like you want that.

This is sort of like going down to the dealership and buying a new car. From a guys perspective you always want a test drive. From a girls perspective, especially a younger and less experienced one it's the Powell doctrine:

"You break it, you own it."

Be careful.

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I will prob go for the tension. If need be i can be honest about my long term intentions. They really are changing. The more i have talked abou this with my close friends and here on the forum, the more i am forced to look at where i stand. I have a fear of commitment, but she actually has the best shot at changing that. She got me out of my comfort zone, and got me to make the first move. That never happens. We get along well, and now she is starting to open up to me. She shared more about herslef last night, then she has in all of our interactions. I would be fine with not making a move on her this weekend.

I love the refrence to the Powell doctrine. lol. That is the best way of summing it up. Ill be carefull, I do not wanna make any waves with this one.

Well, I'm not involved with the community on a local level either. I sarge alone. I pick up girls alone. I take out pivots alone. I don't have other guys with me in the field, although I'm seriously considering enlisting some AFC's next time I'm in the club and helping them to be PUA's if they so desire. Remember, lead the men and the women will follow. Just one of those attraction switches.

And, when she is there for the party, don't ignore her. You should DEFINITELY amp up the attraction. You don't have to go in for the kill, so to speak, but DO amp up the attraction. DON'T STOP DOING THAT. Never stop doing that. But, do keep in mind . . . she may hit a point while you're doing that, that she WANTS you and HAS TO HAVE you, too. So be ready, either way.

EDIT: P.S. You made the remark that you shouldn't be a virgin at this point. Note . . . THERE'S NOTHING WRONG with being a virgin. Just control yourself. Even if you're not a virgin, you still need to control yourself.

I feel you on that. I never actually thought about going in feild with a group of AFC's. I can't wait till i get the chance to work club game, but that is still a couple years away.

I will most deff amp up the attraction. I think i am gonna start it hardcore in a day or two. Like Romeo said about pushing her against the wall and then moving in, but then backing off and playing like it was nothing. Just some things to get me stuck in her mind until this weekend.

I know there is nothing wrong with it. I just say that because i seem to have the strangest luck with full closes. (maybe it's just because i haven't found the right one) Ill give you guys an example, that hopefully will not let people know who i am lol. This girl i had been working on calls me one night and says she wants to have sex. So i am like ok, i am game. I am getting directions to her house, and then my phone just dies. I had never been to her house, i didn't know her number, stores were closed so i couldn't get a charger. I was stuck ass out. Random stuff like that normally happens to me. But like i said, all those time were not supposed to happen. I will prob lose it while in a LTR.

LMAO. OMG, that's just called . . . being prepared, lol.

The thing is, if she ready ready and willing for you THAT night, you shouldn't have a problem hooking up with her now either.

lol, a different girl was involved in that side story. I do have a back story with the girl this whole post is about. I am gonna save you time and just skip to the juicy part of the story. lol. Her best friend, who dated one of my friends; tried to get with me. She thought i had sex with her bestfriend in the bathroom. After that whole mess, i stopped talking to them for a while. My friend had sex with and then dumped the bestfriend. I straighten that out, but then i have another friend who tries to go for this girl. (we are not friends anymore) And here is the messed up part. MY friend that dated this girls bestfriend, comes back to visit and tries to get with her now. So to make that into a intelligent scenario. I go for x, the bestfriend of x goes for me, eventhough she is dating my friend A. Friend A takes her best friends virginity, and then dumps her, Friend B, tries to go for girl x, and dosen't succeed. ( I still wanna know what the hell went on during this time). Then friend A come back into town, and tell girl x, that he always wanted to get with her, but her bestfriend got in the way.

This whole thing is what helped contribute to the whole group of guys being called players and just trying to get with girls and leave them.

Ok, doesn't matter that that side story was about another girl. The fact is, she was ready for you that night, you should be able to get her ready again, UNLESS she was just looking for any dick to fuck that night.

Ummm, why is it a MESS that a girl thought you had fucked her friend in a bathroom?

Ok, now, if I'm understanding this last part right . . . YOUR friend actually took the girl that YOU were after. THAT'S not cool. THAT'S definitely not your friend. It's bro's before hoes, and obviously your friend doesn't adhere to that code. So, your supposed friend is seeing the bestfriend, who is actually coming after you. I would take that girl and fuck her, if it was me, after him going and taking the virginity of the girl you were actually going after, since his girl was coming for you anyway. Then, he takes that girls virginity, the one YOU wanted to begin with, and he fucking dumps her. So, he JUST wanted to pop her cherry and that's it. And, he didn't even give a shit that YOU wanted her. He is flat out an asshole and you don't need him to be associated with you. Is his girl still seeing him? If so, you don't need her acquainence either. If not, I would cut ties with him and start talking to those two girls again.

lol, another misscomunication there. It is easier to understand if you hear it. None of my "friends" had sex with the girl i was going after. They tried to, during the period that i stopped talking to her. I do not associate myself with them anymore though. She kind of helped open my eyes to a lot of there stuff., to one of my friends, who then dumped her after doing that. The girl i am going for lost her virginity to someone i do not know. To my knowledge she dosen't associate with him anymore. Seems like i am gonna end up losing more friends behind this girl though. I have had this vibe the last couple of days (really got to me this morning) that my closest friend might do something relative to this girl that i am going for. He gets a kick out of cockblocking me. He did it before when i was trying to get this girl back to a "better" location. She forgot her jacket at his house (from the weekend), and i told him about it. He tells me to tell her to come over and get it. This sent up a bit of a red flag for me. So i have been telling him that i pick it up from his house or his job. He keeps avoiding this. I can't help but think he plans to pull something.

And this is your "best" friend. I wouldn't want a "worst" friend if that was my best friend.

Oh believe me, he has lost that status. If what i am thinking is correct, he is gonna get something special. We are cool with eachother, but when i have a girl around; he does a total 180. Cockbloks, does stuff that he knows will make me mad, and get really touchy with them. He hasn't been that bad with this girl, but he is almost never around her. I see him like once or twice a week at the most. I am happy that this girl came around, everyone is showing me their true colors. Now i can draw a line between friend and foe. If it makes things better, his last girl friend use to always ask why he couldn't be more like me. lol.