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I know what you mean and that "oneitis" is a no no.
What if though you feel there is this chance? Like she saw me give it a shot but it doesn't mean I have to give up. We get on well, seem jealous when people are around one eachother and have attraction.
Or am I missing something? is there no way back after failed kiss close? I think she was flattered and was worried I was embarrased. I wasn't, I just hope that maybe when she is isolated properly, things will come together. She said she wanted to speak to me today so I migh give it a go with a flirty txt a bit later, but I don't want to come across too interested.
The circumstances of your relationship with this girl are too strange to have a great shot at anything. The fact that you've known each other for so long without kissing doesn't bode well.
That said, you probably still have a chance. She's still comfortable investing time into you and had no LJBF speech.
My advice is to give her some space, keep gaming her a little but try to find other girls to be around. A little jealousy might do her good and your best game is always going to come from a state of abundance.