Ok, went out to larger town today, far amount of sets around, only approached 2 partly due to approach anxiety (i can approach, but i really have to focus and push myself, its not natural YET)

and partly due to fact I was looking for a job

scratch that, i coulda approached more if id pushed myself more

anyway, one thing i realised today is that the opener, if direct, really does not matter.
Ive been so focused on getting a good opener and delivering right that ive put too much pressure on it.

Fuck it, today i opened a russian girl with "do you know where XYZ is" she didnt even understand what XYZ was due to language barrier, but she still stopped and talked. Now theres me obsessing over the "perfect opener" and not really having prepared what to do next, so what happens the most i can do is make a little joke out of the situation

So from now on, im going to just fucking assume i have the most banging WINNING opener ever, and say whatever i can think of on spot, and just prepare the transition and DHV'ing

update tomorow

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

ahh.

went out daygaming today in my local town, or trying to at least.

First set I saw, was way ahead but It looked good, 2 girls and 1 guy, but the guy wasnt particularly threatening (like a chav or something) so I thought hey go for it.

Couldnt catch upto them quick enough without actually running so they got away (that sounds bad)

second set I saw, 3HB's with their very angry looking mum. intended to approach until i saw the look on the mums face, pure aggression. looking back now I wish i'd approached anyway, fuck it lol, but I may be in hospital if I did.

Its easy to say oh there wasnt enough sets, but fuck that if im gunna get good at this gotta invest alot of time, so looking back i probs only spent bout an hour in town. from now on im going to make sure I spend at least 3 hours a day daygaming.

Im going to plan exactly where Im going to go, and for how long.

SETS SETS SETS

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

went to town for longer today and planned my route. This time came across 3-4 sets

the first set was in a park, i just asked "this is XYZ park right?" I planned on transitioning but honestly it was just an awful approach altogether. the next few sets after that I didnt go for, I think partly because I didnt prepare enough, and have some limiting beliefs about how it makes me look.

Anyway, I want to start getting some solid routines for when I do approach, enough to talk for at least 5 mins straight. by then the convo should be more natural.

update tomorow

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

in contrast to yesterdays worst ever approach, today I had the best daygame approach ive ever done.

I was in town meeting a friend and a little early, so i thought might aswell see whos around. used opener "do you know wheres a good place to get a part time job round here?" then after this did some teasing and chatted for a minute or 2, at first the HB was a little off put and shrewd just pointing to a shop, then after a few seconds when i negged her (she pointed to shop looking for full time staff, so i teased saying "no im looking for part time, thats why i said 'part time') she opened up and we had a short convo on getting jobs, i then ejected and she wished me gd luck.

From now on, im gunna get openers for every situation i find myself in, at bus stops etc etc, the routine after can generally be the same and will be for now.

update soon

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

+1.. and she may have hot friends.

ok, last night went out to night game, was field with band playing and quite alota people.

was really buzzing for it and figured id just use opener "hey, are you guys social?" in a real energetic manner, this got an equally energetic response from quite a few sets, but most were just pretty much not up for meeting new people or suming! high bitch shield!

thinking about it, i did open a few successfully, but instead of stacking routines i just asked for names and did usual small talk. I think the thing to learn from that is to always have a routine/story ready to go. that way if theyre not into it straight away you've got some leeway.

anyway today im way to knackered but tomorow more daygaming!

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

right just thought id summarize last week in terms of sarging, what I learnt and plans for next week.

In terms of opening numbers, I opened about 20-25 overall, which is what im aiming to do each week, but 15 of these came from one nightgame which i wont have this week, so need to make sure approaching at least 3 times a day

This week, had bad times and good times. done worst daygame aswell as best daygame.

the worst was me just being really shy, approaching awkardly, barely making sense and walking off after 5 secs.

the best was me being confident, approaching well, teasing and getting into decent convo.

What i learnt overall:

- Before I go out, ALWAYS spend a little time getting into state and sorting inner game

- Girls will respond! Its ok to use more lengthy opinion openers as girls will stop and listen even if they dont here you (russian girl) and by saying something interesting im adding value.

- its good to have routines so to prolong interaction, or at least some kind of transition ready. Expect each set to go really well so have these things ready.

-Smile when i approach

- its a game of numbers, approach as much as poss

Aims for next week:

I really wanna have this opening down in next 10 approaches, so that at least one in 5 sets will open well. hopefully would have done this by thursday. After that i want to focus on getting into an interesting convo

update soon!

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

Ah, feeling abit shit and having much more AA recently, or just insecurity. didnt approach yday or today even though went out intending too

also, i feel like my life is imbalanced. Instead of organising stuff to do with mates, im just going out during day for a few hours trying to pickup.

I dont know, it just feels like so much effort for something that should be so natural,

thoughts?

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

If it was easy then every guy would be getting laid by hot ass women every day.

It is not easy, not for us anyway.

Try not thinking so much about the outcome. If you get rejected by a girl, that is a success. If you get her number...great, but when it comes to AA , it is highly unlikely that your gonna number close anyway so, if your still having AA, the outcome of the inital approach is completely unimportant. What is important is that you APPROACH. IF you get a number that is not more succeessful than being rejected. You either approach or you dont.

This was my mentality that helped me overcome AA. (Trust me it was not a quick proccess).

Hope this helps.

cheers drunk romeo definitely true, its gunna be hard work but fuck it what isnt,
earlier i was just stuck in a negative thought cycle,

one good tip i got from AFC daniel is to go out with an intention to do something other than sarge, then obviously approach along the way.

as long as im getting the approaches ill try this

man, this journey is harder than thought. gotta battle with so many different internal things. Aint just picking up girls, its fighting for your right to be high value, with yourself.

update tomorow

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

havnt updated this in a few days, been quite busy

anyways, other day met a few mates in epsom. we went to chill in park as it was a sunny day, and there were HB's everywhere. I suggest we go talk to some of them and a friend agrees.

alot of them were in big groups of guys, but intimidating so we went for only girl sets. just used a genuine opener, said hey we are waiting for a friend, bit bored do you mind if we come talk to you guys? they were abit giggly which ive heard is a good thing, and didnt really know how to react, but defo didnt mind at all.

From here we had a laugh with them, only one decent girl there tbh, she was only a 7, i think it coulda worked out if i had taking control of the situation and started DHV'ing and generally pushing the interaction forward.

I dont think i would have done sucha risky opener if i was on my own, but thats just something i have to work on, until then i plan to use a few opinion openers.

ive been working yesterday and today, but my plan is to go out with friends like a normally would and everytime i see a HB approach, and if not meeting them and feeling the need to get some approaches done, ill do some other activity in a busy place and just approach when i see HB's

one thing im beggining to realise is that the more i approach the much much higher chance ill get something. I want to develop the attitude that everygirl i dont approach i will never see again, so nows my only chance!

update soon

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

just got back from town but didnt approach, and havnt done in past week mainly due to fact been working. Well i approached a few nights ago but i was absolutely plastered so it dont count.

Anyway, ive just gotta keep approaching. Ive recognised id say what is the final nail in the coffin for killing bad beliefs/inner game, i now know im high value, people are friendly and want to talk, and that girls want sex, but have recognised that one major limiting belief i have is that going out and approaching, particularly on my own, is low value. it explains the loss of state when im out on my own during the day i guess, so tonight that is one thing im going to work on.

but either way gotta keep approaching! gotta go do my job in a sec, if i see any HB's i will defo approach, but in mean time if not just gunna have normal convosations with normal everyday people, just to get into swing of talking to new people!

update soon, stay safe those in cities in uk

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

eliminating this limiting belief has reallly realllly helped in terms of approaching.

I mean i still get AA, but i can push through it now much easier. And as a result the other day I got another real good approach down.

Was at park at first and 2 hb's nearish me sitting having lunch break or w.e, but hesitated too much so they left (dam) so im walking around and see this (from a distance) really hot looking girl. blonde, tanned, curvy with just right clothes on too show it off. she was looking hot and she knew it. anyway so im like wow ive got to approach her,

i cross over and walk past, as i do i just go, hey this is abit random but can i ask you a question? (should i just go lemme ask you a question? or would this make them too uncomfortable cos its daygame? or am i thinking too much lol?)

i was surprised at how well she responded, coming close to me smiling and having really open happy BL. so i run the friends bday opener and shes receptive, i tease her on giving a boring answer, just generally have fun. after this dies down i change to a different thread, just a normal one bout where to find a job. we spoke and laughed abit more. This is where looking back I knew i shoulda just gone "hey you seem fun, whats your name" and gone from there, but i didnt. aah well always next time!

I see now how much you can compare this too boxing. The learning and reading of techniques is like shadow boxing and bagwork, getting your techniques right. Inner game is like stamina work, allowing you to actually pull of these techniques without being to out of breath, and the actual field work is like sparring (in a non violent way) at first you just gotta get used to actually doing it before you can improve, you swing wildly and are pretty scared, just relying on instincts. Then as you get more relaxed and experienced you can begin to add in techniques to improve your game.

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

Don't be too negative. That's a really good result! If you want to do better next time, replay the conversation and imagine what you could have said to take the interaction further. It's actually what you've done when you wrote you should have said "hey you seem fun, what's your name"...

Damn, I should try this whole birthday thing... My sister's birthday is coming soon...

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On the Road to Manhood, my new learning journal: http://bit.ly/TEVapM
(My old learning journal http://bit.ly/eYRWL4)

Ahh just got back from town.

Today, was not feeling it. Wasnt too badly out of state, but wasnt feeling it like last few days. I missed first few sets just because of this, yet I was a man determined!

So I kept looking and eventually came across a 2 set. So, I went for it. The AA was the same, I guess when your not in state you just dont enjoy it as much, theres more "oh fuck sake" rather than "ah this will be fun". I did my opener and noticed a few things

1) Girls dont respond aswell when Im not in state - cant blame them, if im not having as much fun they wont be

2) In the first few seconds, body language, how you speak and all communication other than the actual spoken words is key. I noticed this, alot of the time, girls will actually ask you to repeat what you said, your opener, they heard you say it, but just didnt process it. Why? well probably because theyre too busy processing everything else about you, which is natural your a stranger after all.

so aims for next time, I would say something about state, but at this stage ive done everything possible for that, just gotta keep practicing, maybe watch blue print again. Im happy that even though i wasnt in state i still approached, so ill just keep that up. other than that

- Make an effort to improve my way of speaking and body language when I approach.

any good sources for this?

update soon!

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees