Do you only approach after you get an IOI?



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PostPosted: Thu Jul 28, 2011 3:07 am 
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I, myself, have been trying to get IOIs before approaching. I go to the mall, library, gym, park, school. BUT, I almost NEVER get any IOIs from girls. I will project IOIs on girls though wherever I go. Ill always stare at girls and see if they stare back. Almost none do. They just keep walking and staring forward. So should I not approach? Or is it because theyre busy shopping, etc?

Mystery seem to jump right in before getting IOIs, after looking at his show.

I seem to take this personally like its a rejection. Especially when they look the other way when I stare at them. Or when they walk away.

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Last edited by peel on Thu Jul 28, 2011 3:30 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 28, 2011 3:30 am 
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Most of the time I don't get one, since the approach is made within the first 3 seconds. It's just too awkward to stand around for a while then make the approach 5 minutes later.


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 28, 2011 3:33 am 
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lol, ever think maybe they JUST DONT SEE YOU? just because every girl in the world doesnt look at you doesnt mean they woulnt like your personality, your looks, style ect. Usually i recommend against staring-thats creepy XD. and do the 3 second rule too. women dont always give IOI's based on looks so just cuz a girl doesnt present herself on a silver platter doesnt mean you should give up.


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 28, 2011 3:39 am 
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Mystery got attention. He was an attention whore and he dressed like a clown in feather boas, fuzzy tophats, make up, nail polish etc etc etc etc and he is 6 and half feet tall. If some 61/2' tall guy in a tophat and feather boa and platform shoes is coming out you, you are going to look and some people are going to be fascinated enough by a freak that they want to know more.

Most normal guys are invisable. If you are an average guy and don't do anything to draw attention to yourself you are invisable. If you are tall, muscular, dress really well and are way above average looking you will probably garner attention and IOIs before meeting someone or speaking to them. If you are not those things you are invisable.

And worse yet if you are "staring" at them and not approaching and not talking to them you will creep them out.

That's the bad news.

The good news is women are attracted to so much more than simply physical appearance. You may be invisable but when you approach someone and engage them, if you can hold their attention for even a few moments you will become visable. If you approach well and seem like the kind of person they are interested in they may become attracted even if you were completely invisable a few minutes before.

In many ways that is what PUA is. it is teaching normal average invisable guys how to approach and engage someone in a manner that will allow you to hold their attention long enough (which may only be a few minutes or sometimes even seconds) to see that you are a decent person worthy of their consideration.

You are making a mistake if you are going out and only showing people your body but not engaging them and showing them your personality and true self.


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 28, 2011 3:46 am 
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Oh and I was going to mention this. You very rarely if ever will get pre-approach IOIs unless you are unusually good looking.

If you wait for IOIs to happen before you approach, you will never get the chance to approach. You have to take the initiative and approach and engage and then at some point the IOIs may start coming.

The good news is just the simple act of approaching and engaging a woman (as long as you aren't being rude or obnoxious or being a dick) is in and of it'sself often attractive to women.

Other than truly model/movie star caliber people, guys are just not visually striking and do not garner instant attraction on simply their appearance.

Men select women on how they look, women select men on what they do (do as in performing what their capabilities are, not necessarily what their actual occupation is)


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 28, 2011 3:47 am 
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HELL NO man. Don't ever waste your time dicking around looking for IOIs.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 28, 2011 4:31 pm 
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approach invites are not needed, but if you want to improve the amount of approach invites i suggest the following first check out this thread and read the part about approach invites, so you can tell when your getting one
patterns-i-have-noticed-vt96463.html

next, if you want to improve the amount of them you get try the following,
1)get into state (happy mood)

2)pick something to think of that will sub-communicate an attractive confident quality
(for example, I AM SO FUCKING CHARMING, NO GIRL COULD RESIST *can be anything that will positively effect your sub-communications*) just repeat this over and over in your head until you are truly believing in it

3)slow your movements down, relax, walk slower, try to actually feel powerful as you move, like all your movements are very powerful and you are important,

4)do not check out girls, just focus on what you are focusing on, do not react to anything, if a girl passes your vision, do not flintch of look away everything that holds your attention does so because you choose so, you are not reactive, you do not look away or at anything too quickly unless it garners your attention and rightfully deserves it

5)dress in an attractive manner, dress in a manner that would be attractive to those that you would like to attract, also all out pea-cocking (the more you stand out) the more attention you will receive (forced looks, not necessarily attraction just attention)

6)do your hair nice don't keep it plain, get a haircut and style it, just groom yourself in general

NOW DO NOT DIRECTLY STARE, JUST CHECK YOUR PERIPHERALS FOR GIRLS LOOKING IN YOUR DIRECTION, WHEN YOU NOTICE IT, SLOWLY TURN YOUR HEAD LEADING WITH YOUR EYES TOWARDS THE GIRL LOOKING IN YOUR DIRECTION, LOOK FOR THE INVITE, THE MORE YOU ARE ACTUALLY PAYING ATTENTION AND CONSCIOUSLY TRYING TO NOTICE THE INVITES THE MORE YOU WILL SEE THEM,

just think though of when you are walking and another guy who is bigger and more intimidating then you snaps his head at you and stares at you quick, the natural reaction is to look away fast, same for girls but they are even more timid and less confident (usually)

anyways i hope this helps you


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 6:34 am 
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Any other feedback?
I found no matter how much effort I put into looks and body language, my pre-IOIs barely increase
Thanks guys though I think imma just grow some balls

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Just trying to meet a 10.


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 7:16 am 
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Quote:
Any other feedback?
I found no matter how much effort I put into looks and body language, my pre-IOIs barely increase
Thanks guys though I think imma just grow some balls
the better looking and more well dressed you are (to fit a girls sterotypical type) the more approach invites you will get, stop looking for them, improve yourself the best you can, and just approach, don't worry about this shit, just hit the gym and dress better, and start going for it, invite or no invite


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 7:37 am 
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If you're really a nobody in the mass than above average peacocking is your only option. It takes confidence, girls will call you out on it (so prepare the answers beforehand), but it guarantees you attention.
I myself am no Mystery when it comes to peacocking but I will make sure there's always something I'm wearing for women to touch, feel or comment on. They love it (and then they call me out on it. On which the answer always is "Yes I'm vain."

Peacocking is by absolutely not necessary to score, but it can be a little aid.


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