http://www.okcupid.com/profile/sonic172

I don't get it, I've shortened it down a bit more, taken out some of the details to add more mystery but it's not going well at all,

Also does anyone use any NLP in there messages?

Your profile doesn't really give any tangible information about you. It's almost like you're dodging most of the questions. It's almost too short now, too.

Try to be funny while also including solid information. For example, if you REALLY like food (do not actually put this in your profile - everyone likes food so that would be stupid), you could say something like:

"When it comes to food I'm pretty much a walking trash compactor. If you stabbed my mother and then handed me a cupcake, it would take me way longer than it should to come to a decision as to which should get my attention first."

Thanks for the input, I've added a bit more into it, changed the food bit and tried to make it a bit funnier,

Improvement?

The only thing that stuck out for me was the age range for woman was between 18-25 and your 21. Now there is nothing wrong with you wanting to go out with an 18 year old! However, if you change it to your looking for 20-25 year old girls it may give the impression that your more mature! I'm not saying that you are not mature! Plus if you do end up messaging a girl of 19 and you hit it off, you can say "I don't normally chat to someone who is 19 but there was something different/more mature about you"

Just my 2 cents

Cheers, this has been updated, will it restrict who can message me though?

I don't think it restricts who messages you! Have you tried messaging people with the new profile? Any success?

I've had a couple of replies, interest seems to disappear after a couple of messages though, it's hard to maintain momentum

maybe i'm just a pessimist but that thing about eating x2 your body weight, if i read that on a girls profile i reckon i would be wondering if it was some fat girl using a fake pic. i liked the going to the moon, bring your coat bit tho, thats a nice touch.

Geez where to start?

You need more pictures! Pictures are worth a lot if you say you are into something like DJing then get more pictures of you doing that. If you say you like to play basketball then get pictures of you doing that being active and backing up what you say in your profile. Pictures with your guy friends are good with women are good too cause it shows you have healthy relationships with girls.

You need to fill out the rest of your profile the stuff on religion and smoking and things.... When you don't it looks like you are hiding things.

You don't tell us a lot about you really. There are a few things about what you like to do and you eat a lot and stuff but you don't really tell us what you are like. What is your personality like spend a little time talking about it.

Tell the reader who you are after. You talk a little about the type of girl you like but it's three sentences. Remember you want to give a description that is not too specific but gives enough that she knows she is the type of girl that you are after!

You also need a sentence that grabs the readers attention.

That's all the tips I have for you at the moment. GOOD LUCK!

Okay updated,

Should I ditch the "casual sex" thing in what I'm looking for?

Yes, definitely.

Yes - BUT if that is what you are looking for you need to tell her that 1 on 1. That is not to be put online really. Set the expectations in person when you're on your date so that she doesn't come into it thinking you're after a relationship.

What do you consider not going well? Over the long term you're only going to get a 30%-50% open rate anyway.

I think the biggest problem is that site is a lousy dating site. Most people I suspect go on there just to answer all those questions and quizzes. There matching system is jacked up too.

POF is easier, but you're also going to find more low quality women.

Clist is even easier, but you may have trouble getting them to remove your information when you no longer want to have an ad up and the women are some of the least attractive. Not to mention it is full of junk these days.

Match is probably your best bet for a dating site, but you will run into more serious, relationship minded women and it isn't free.

Fb (or similar) is your best bet for sites that aren't strictly dating sites.

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Hi, I'm A. Fahren and I'm an author. I love to travel, socialize, and am hopelessly addicted to movies. That's about it.

I seem to be doing a lot better now thanks for the input, I've used the same info for my POF account and seem to be getting a few people message me which is pretty cool!

I think the bio is too generic. Not enough individual personality shines through.

Also, I think the pic is hurting you. It's a little too "nice" and says to me "i hope you like me"

Get an action shot or something with a little more attitude. The picture should say "i don't give a fuck" more than "check me out".

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"Would it be wrong to join sexaholics anonymous to pick-up chicks?" "...yes, and stop eating that baby."

-Psych3r-